Yes, the world is fucked up, it's okay, ignore those people, stand by what you believe.
Funny enough we have arguments on here but we still respect each other...I do for you at least.
My father does not accept my sexuality. He found out around one year ago. He says I don't love him, he says I don't give a shit about him, he says I never listen to him. He makes me feel awful about that. I know who I am and what I want, but he keeps saying these things, and they're not truth. I have stopped talking to a lot of friends since this whole thing has started. I'm only 17, so there's nothing I can do. There's nothing more I can tell him. While my friends are having fun and living their lives, I'm still at this situation. Everyone is living their lives, except me. It's been one year and he still doesn't accept my preference, and sometimes I think he'll never do. Yeap, I don't love my life.
My father does not accept my sexuality. He found out around one year ago. He says I don't love him, he says I don't give a shit about him, h… moree says I never listen to him. He makes me feel awful about that. I know who I am and what I want, but he keeps saying these things, and they're not truth. I have stopped talking to a lot of friends since this whole thing has started. I'm only 17, so there's nothing I can do. There's nothing more I can tell him. While my friends are having fun and living their lives, I'm still at this situation. Everyone is living their lives, except me. It's been one year and he still doesn't accept my preference, and sometimes I think he'll never do. Yeap, I don't love my life.
I worry about everything, no matter how small or insignificant.
I can't talk to people. Seeing new people practically makes me shut down, and it can easily take well over a month for me to actually say something to someone I don't know.
I tend to be very sarcastic, and not a lot of people around here understand sarcasm that well, so some of the people I open up to consider me a jackass and won't have anything to do with me if they can help it.
So, I'm an introvert, and I have quite a lot of problems when socializing, just because I'm kind of awkward and inexperienced at that. My male friends (colleagues, acquaintances, etc) take my manner of speech and the way I usually talk about stuff pretty normally, but, with my female acquaintances it can get really awkward, and therefore I don't really talk to them often, just to avoid confusion or potential unpleasantness. I most likely have Asperger's Syndrome, however, it's self-diagnosed, mostly because I apply for a lot of associated symptoms. Also, possibly due to my lack of social skills, or simply the way I am, I can often be rude and abrasive to people, even when I don't exactly want that. Always was a pain in the ass for me.
And, due to, in part, the previous paragraph, I'm socially awkward and, I guess, quite shy in real life. I can talk to people I'm acquainted with with little to no problem, but with some random strangers, or with people I've met very recently? Hell no. Also, I consider myself a coward, mostly due to my indecisiveness and unwillingness to take actions that can either be beneficial or end in failure. I'm afraid of being rejected, and, therefore, I never go forward with, for example, trying to start a relationship. I start listing cons, and the idea gets shelved pretty quickly. And I know that I might end up regretting not taking action before something I could do no longer gives me an opportunity to do so, but, I just tell myself "So be it".
Due to everything aforementioned, I also have a low self-esteem. I don't consider myself funny, or good-looking (since I'm actually a bit overweight, not to mention that I don't consider myself handsome, at all), or interesting, or anything worthwhile. I don't think I can do anything right, and I don't consider myself qualified for almost anything. While others have said often that I actually have some useful skills or abilities, I usually end up not believing them, or thinking they praise me way too much, since I've done nothing outstanding.
I could go on and on about it, but I figured I've already written enough. The confession is over, padre, give my thy absolution.
@sprocket23
Please, don't do that. You are - strong. It seems that each of us in this world thought about it. Almost everyone stupidity c… moreommitted in childhood, which then regretted, and I'm including. But the main thing that you regret. You are realized their mistakes, not all who have committed no fault of their own, but because of the other.
Do not say that. We need you. If you want, I can be your friend here. I have seen many support you and I am not alone. You can relying on us whenever you want. We're all friends here. Sometimes good people do bad things. Because bad things happen to everyone.
Sorry for my bad English, if that. I am from Ukraine and I'm glad to be here with you guys
Good to know. Well, nice to meet you. I don't see many Ukrainians around here (have only ever seen two, you included), so, it's good to meet some of my countrymen on the forums.
Good to know. Well, nice to meet you. I don't see many Ukrainians around here (have only ever seen two, you included), so, it's good to meet some of my countrymen on the forums.
Yeah, it's kind of surprising. I thought I'd never meet anyone from Ukraine around here.
Most people I've seen around from post-Soviet states were Russians, but, the most I've spoken to were decent people, in my opinion.
I never felt anything when a few people I knew died as well, not sure what that says about me.
Part of PTSD, you know how many people i know that died. The deadening of your feelings, that is what i mean when i say i don't care, I don't know how anymore.
I have quite bad depression, anti depressants don't do anything. It makes everything boring and miserable, can't concentrate on anything. So… moremething happened to me in my childhood which has fucked me over for life, sex is ruined for me, I can barely talk to people properly, I flinch like a twat whenever anybody comes near me. I'm just sick of it all, I've put up with this shit my whole life it feels like. I just wish I was conscious of how bloody wrong it was as a kid, how could I have not fucking said or done something? I could've fucking ended it. I just went along with it like a fucking retard who thought it was normal.
I think i got mine thinking back when my brother was knifed in front of me in a robbery, that is when i believe i started acting "crazy." Ever since then, i don't let people get 24 inches close to me to avoid being stabbed. It messed me up for a while, i kept seeing the blood, now i just close my eyes. I think my PTSD actually helped me in a way, when i was in Iraq, it made me the most uncaring asshole around. I knew guys just come over, die a few weeks later, everyone else would be broken up, not me. I didn't feel anything, couldn't.
You can't tell me one person who had only good on his mind for his whole life, we're all "monsters", only that it's not a monster, it's just an average human.
My PTSD was bad for a while, it made a me very mean person for a few years, just recently i been trying to adjust my attitude, so i don't get asked the following:
What is wrong with George?
Why is he acting that way?
Why are you so mean!?
You don't care about me!
I think the biggest problem i have now is i say something from my "crazy" brain, i don't mean it to be insulting but normal people take it as i am being insulting or mean.
I just usually keep my thoughts, opinions to my self now adays, to protect myself from making another person angry at me.
This is difficult for me to say but hopefully one day it may help another person either here on this forum or in real life, who may be dealing with the same bs.
I have severe trust and commitment issues. I can't tell you how many boyfriends I've gone through over the last few years. (I'm male) I'm currently in a relationship now with the most wonderful, caring and understanding man. He takes his time with me and does not expect too much, considering he knows a bit from my past.
I was sexually violated at a young age by my mother's boyfriend at the time. My mother did not believe me because at the time, this guy was providing the majority of the income; she was afraid if I said anything, they would take him away and we'd be on the streets. This happened for a year until she came home and found me naked and unconscience in the bathtub. I don't remember much of that day, to be honest. It was as if I was asleep.
I did need an operation because of torn muscles and bleeding near my rectum. He was arrested, convicted and sent to prison; my mother lost the house but my aunt thankfully took us in. I've been to many therapists and have talked about it but since then, I have a hard time trusting people. I can't be around large crowds, I never had many friends because of this or hung out at random homes due to this fear. Going to school was difficult and dating was hard, as stated above. Besides my current BF, there is ONE friend I go to and confide in. He's the only one I really trust. Why? Bout the only one that didn't label me as a 'freak' 'loser' or told me 'to get over it....it happened a long time ago, dude.'
I hate being this way and I do have my good days but the bad sadly win each time.
It was to start this thread off...You know if you actually fucking read then you would realize this.
Now i'm not going to respond to anything else you say because this is a place of helping others and if you're going to start saying i'm only wanting people to feel sorry for Me on a thread where everyone is posting their problems then you need to leave.
It was to start this thread off...You know if you actually fucking read then you would realize this.
Now i'm not going to respond to anyt… morehing else you say because this is a place of helping others and if you're going to start saying i'm only wanting people to feel sorry for Me on a thread where everyone is posting their problems then you need to leave.
Seriously, what the fuck, read from now on.
Also, these should be considered virtues.. But oh well, I'm brutally honest and I tend to follow my ethics above all else. These two, man, they brought me some trouble. Also, I'm very loyal to those I consider close to me, which aslo has brought me more burden than bliss. So many times have I been let down because of these.
God fucking damn it. On top of all that, I'm someone that acts on emotions too quickly, which is a bad thing I know but I just can't fucking help it, and because of it I end up making decisions I later lament.
I remember one time I tried protecting someone that would later become my girlfriend, from a guy that used to be my friend. Anyways long story short, we had an argument. I took her side, and I stopped talking to that fuck. He kept throwing threats my way, luckily never had the balls to actually do anything. Some time passed, everyhting was just dandy when all of a sudden she started talking to him. More and more each day, and I just fucking stood there watching. I stood up to him because of her and this is what I get? No, fuck both of you. Ughhh.
Just one of many god damn shitty situations I have brought upon my self. And I know this all sounds just fucking pathetic but I thought it would help, venting and shit.
I'm mostly quiet. Fast to call someone an ass.
Also, these should be considered virtues.. But oh well, I'm brutally honest and I tend to … morefollow my ethics above all else. These two, man, they brought me some trouble. Also, I'm very loyal to those I consider close to me, which aslo has brought me more burden than bliss. So many times have I been let down because of these.
God fucking damn it. On top of all that, I'm someone that acts on emotions too quickly, which is a bad thing I know but I just can't fucking help it, and because of it I end up making decisions I later lament.
I remember one time I tried protecting someone that would later become my girlfriend, from a guy that used to be my friend. Anyways long story short, we had an argument. I took her side, and I stopped talking to that fuck. He kept throwing threats my way, luckily never had the balls to actually do anything. Some time passed, everyhting was just dandy when all of … [view original content]
I have chrones disease, it usually doesn't bother me but every once in awhile it comes back up. The medicine I'm on destroys my Immune system, so im Very vulnerable to diseases and illnesses. I also have a minor case of insomnia as of now.
Sorry for being a dick yesterday, I was in a mood and wanted to take it out on someone. I normally stay off the forum when I'm being stupid to avoid stuff like this
It was to start this thread off...You know if you actually fucking read then you would realize this.
Now i'm not going to respond to anyt… morehing else you say because this is a place of helping others and if you're going to start saying i'm only wanting people to feel sorry for Me on a thread where everyone is posting their problems then you need to leave.
Seriously, what the fuck, read from now on.
Comments
I respect almost everyone on here, with only one exception I can think of off the top of my head, so yeah the feeling's mutual.
Good, although we don't agree with each others views I respect you and respect your views, don't let anything I say tell you otherwise.
My father does not accept my sexuality. He found out around one year ago. He says I don't love him, he says I don't give a shit about him, he says I never listen to him. He makes me feel awful about that. I know who I am and what I want, but he keeps saying these things, and they're not truth. I have stopped talking to a lot of friends since this whole thing has started. I'm only 17, so there's nothing I can do. There's nothing more I can tell him. While my friends are having fun and living their lives, I'm still at this situation. Everyone is living their lives, except me. It's been one year and he still doesn't accept my preference, and sometimes I think he'll never do. Yeap, I don't love my life.
Just... Forget about him... I'm guessing that you have a very strong attachment to him so this would be hard. I'm sorry for your position.
Yes, I love him. I can't just forget about him. But thanks man. It's nice talk to someone else, it makes me feel better.
I can understand...It's hard when a person you love just gives up on you...This is a place to get our feelings out.
Literally the same.
I think I got Autodysomophobia, I'm always in constant fear of smelling bad.
Lazy ass son of a bitch
Stubborn
Paranoid
Anger
Short attention span
I worry about everything, no matter how small or insignificant.
I can't talk to people. Seeing new people practically makes me shut down, and it can easily take well over a month for me to actually say something to someone I don't know.
I tend to be very sarcastic, and not a lot of people around here understand sarcasm that well, so some of the people I open up to consider me a jackass and won't have anything to do with me if they can help it.
I have a confession to make, padre.
So, I'm an introvert, and I have quite a lot of problems when socializing, just because I'm kind of awkward and inexperienced at that. My male friends (colleagues, acquaintances, etc) take my manner of speech and the way I usually talk about stuff pretty normally, but, with my female acquaintances it can get really awkward, and therefore I don't really talk to them often, just to avoid confusion or potential unpleasantness. I most likely have Asperger's Syndrome, however, it's self-diagnosed, mostly because I apply for a lot of associated symptoms. Also, possibly due to my lack of social skills, or simply the way I am, I can often be rude and abrasive to people, even when I don't exactly want that. Always was a pain in the ass for me.
And, due to, in part, the previous paragraph, I'm socially awkward and, I guess, quite shy in real life. I can talk to people I'm acquainted with with little to no problem, but with some random strangers, or with people I've met very recently? Hell no. Also, I consider myself a coward, mostly due to my indecisiveness and unwillingness to take actions that can either be beneficial or end in failure. I'm afraid of being rejected, and, therefore, I never go forward with, for example, trying to start a relationship. I start listing cons, and the idea gets shelved pretty quickly. And I know that I might end up regretting not taking action before something I could do no longer gives me an opportunity to do so, but, I just tell myself "So be it".
Due to everything aforementioned, I also have a low self-esteem. I don't consider myself funny, or good-looking (since I'm actually a bit overweight, not to mention that I don't consider myself handsome, at all), or interesting, or anything worthwhile. I don't think I can do anything right, and I don't consider myself qualified for almost anything. While others have said often that I actually have some useful skills or abilities, I usually end up not believing them, or thinking they praise me way too much, since I've done nothing outstanding.
I could go on and on about it, but I figured I've already written enough. The confession is over, padre, give my thy absolution.
Sigh.
Partially same.
Almost 100% the same.
Kind of like you.
Oh, you are? Nice. So am I.
Amazing! 0_0
From which you city?
Good ol' Kiev. You?
Volyn region.
Good to know. Well, nice to meet you. I don't see many Ukrainians around here (have only ever seen two, you included), so, it's good to meet some of my countrymen on the forums.
Me too, my native countryman.
You are the first person I met with Ukrainian here: D
Yeah, it's kind of surprising. I thought I'd never meet anyone from Ukraine around here.
Most people I've seen around from post-Soviet states were Russians, but, the most I've spoken to were decent people, in my opinion.
That's good
really? how does this effect your life.
Part of PTSD, you know how many people i know that died. The deadening of your feelings, that is what i mean when i say i don't care, I don't know how anymore.
I am sure you understand.
I had a lot of bad things happen to me as a kid too, sucks doesn't it. I feel your pain.
I think i got mine thinking back when my brother was knifed in front of me in a robbery, that is when i believe i started acting "crazy." Ever since then, i don't let people get 24 inches close to me to avoid being stabbed. It messed me up for a while, i kept seeing the blood, now i just close my eyes. I think my PTSD actually helped me in a way, when i was in Iraq, it made me the most uncaring asshole around. I knew guys just come over, die a few weeks later, everyone else would be broken up, not me. I didn't feel anything, couldn't.
You can't tell me one person who had only good on his mind for his whole life, we're all "monsters", only that it's not a monster, it's just an average human.
My PTSD was bad for a while, it made a me very mean person for a few years, just recently i been trying to adjust my attitude, so i don't get asked the following:
What is wrong with George?
Why is he acting that way?
Why are you so mean!?
You don't care about me!
I think the biggest problem i have now is i say something from my "crazy" brain, i don't mean it to be insulting but normal people take it as i am being insulting or mean.
I just usually keep my thoughts, opinions to my self now adays, to protect myself from making another person angry at me.
I completely isolate myself from other people, and I don't interact with anyone around me at all. I feel like if I do, I'll just be made fun of.
I have this problem of getting stressed out and panicking easily if things don't go my way or just don't go right.
This is difficult for me to say but hopefully one day it may help another person either here on this forum or in real life, who may be dealing with the same bs.
I have severe trust and commitment issues. I can't tell you how many boyfriends I've gone through over the last few years. (I'm male) I'm currently in a relationship now with the most wonderful, caring and understanding man.
He takes his time with me and does not expect too much, considering he knows a bit from my past.
I was sexually violated at a young age by my mother's boyfriend at the time. My mother did not believe me because at the time, this guy was providing the majority of the income; she was afraid if I said anything, they would take him away and we'd be on the streets. This happened for a year until she came home and found me naked and unconscience in the bathtub. I don't remember much of that day, to be honest. It was as if I was asleep.
I did need an operation because of torn muscles and bleeding near my rectum. He was arrested, convicted and sent to prison; my mother lost the house but my aunt thankfully took us in. I've been to many therapists and have talked about it but since then, I have a hard time trusting people. I can't be around large crowds, I never had many friends because of this or hung out at random homes due to this fear. Going to school was difficult and dating was hard, as stated above. Besides my current BF, there is ONE friend I go to and confide in. He's the only one I really trust. Why? Bout the only one that didn't label me as a 'freak' 'loser' or told me 'to get over it....it happened a long time ago, dude.'
I hate being this way and I do have my good days but the bad sadly win each time.
Then why did you write a massive paragraph about yourself if you didn't want help? Or did you just want people to read it and feel sorry for you?
It was to start this thread off...You know if you actually fucking read then you would realize this.
Now i'm not going to respond to anything else you say because this is a place of helping others and if you're going to start saying i'm only wanting people to feel sorry for Me on a thread where everyone is posting their problems then you need to leave.
Seriously, what the fuck, read from now on.
Maybe that's my problem, I can't read.
I'm mostly quiet. Fast to call someone an ass.
Also, these should be considered virtues.. But oh well, I'm brutally honest and I tend to follow my ethics above all else. These two, man, they brought me some trouble. Also, I'm very loyal to those I consider close to me, which aslo has brought me more burden than bliss. So many times have I been let down because of these.
God fucking damn it. On top of all that, I'm someone that acts on emotions too quickly, which is a bad thing I know but I just can't fucking help it, and because of it I end up making decisions I later lament.
I remember one time I tried protecting someone that would later become my girlfriend, from a guy that used to be my friend. Anyways long story short, we had an argument. I took her side, and I stopped talking to that fuck. He kept throwing threats my way, luckily never had the balls to actually do anything. Some time passed, everyhting was just dandy when all of a sudden she started talking to him. More and more each day, and I just fucking stood there watching. I stood up to him because of her and this is what I get? No, fuck both of you. Ughhh.
Just one of many god damn shitty situations I have brought upon my self. And I know this all sounds just fucking pathetic but I thought it would help, venting and shit.
Not your fault. What can you do?
You tell me.
I do realise it's just a figure of speech, but ya know.. So is this.
I have chrones disease, it usually doesn't bother me but every once in awhile it comes back up. The medicine I'm on destroys my Immune system, so im Very vulnerable to diseases and illnesses. I also have a minor case of insomnia as of now.
Sorry for being a dick yesterday, I was in a mood and wanted to take it out on someone. I normally stay off the forum when I'm being stupid to avoid stuff like this
how bad is it?