What come to your mind when you hear the phrase: "Be a Man?"
Does it sound honorable?
Does it sound sexist?
I see it as an honorable statement.
■ A man makes decisions, good or bad, and goes after what he wants in life, instead of waiting for someone else to hand it to him.
■ A man changes the undesirable things that he can, and accepts the bad things he can't change and deals with them to the best of his ability, instead of crying and complaining about it.
■ A man tries his best at everything, even if it is mundane, and even if he does not succeed at it.
■ A man stands up for his principles and beliefs, even when his they're are not popular.
■ A man will apologize when he has done something or said something that is wrong.
But he will not apologize for speaking the truth.
It's one thing to apologize to someone when you're wrong.
But when the truth offends someone, that is their problem, not yours.
■ A man is willing to accept accountability for his actions, both the good and bad, and is willing to take responsibility for them.
For example, if a man gets a woman pregnant, instead of running away, he accepts what he has done, and then he stays and takes care of the human being he helped create.
He shows integrity and does what needs to be done, even when it costs him personally.
This is what marks a true man!
And that is why I find the phrase: "Be A Man", to be an honorable statement.
But what does the statement: "Be A Man," mean to you?
And before you post your response, please remember to be civil and Respectful.
Thank You!
Comments
I see it as a statement that's supposed to make a man act like one, especially in a moment of severe indecisiveness.
It's a phrase that has been used too frequently, and nearly lost it's meaning. To me it used to mean do what you have to do, accept the outcome, don't complain about it. But now it just seems like something people say when they want someone to do something. I really only hear it when someone is trying to get someone to do something they don't want to, whether the phrase should actually apply or not. It's more of a joke to me now.
You have absolutely no situational awareness, do you? Amazing.
But seriously, in the idiomatic sense; it means to soldier through a difficult situation with grim determination.
Based on the description you gave it sounds like the statement could be altered to, "be a decent person."
have a penis
I find it kinda sexist. People should stop telling others what they SHOULD be and try to help them become who they are.
Have you heard of the term "transgender"?
oops i forgot
I see the phrase "Be a man" as being yourself, because I can't think of how acting like someone else is manly.
When I think "Be a man", the first thing that comes to mind is the movie Mulan.
What do I think? I think that it implies a sense of ruthlessness, a message that favours dominance over empathy and is used as a reason to toss aside human emotions. I think of sayings like:
"Don't cry."
"Man up."
"Don't be a pussy."
I think it's demeaning. It's essentially saying "You're not good enough how you are, you have to be what I say you should be."
You're amazing.
Hahaha. Been having a shitty day, but at least it can end on a good note.
Really true, gotta hate people who treat others like there feelings dont matter.
I always thought of it as
"Tuffen up in a difficult situation"
I find it archaic and annoying. All the attributes you listed are not synonymous with "man."
Right.
The word that comes to mind when someone says that to me is "Narrow minded" (I know its 2 words but whatever!)
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Thank you very much.
I like #35.
Difficult to say. As Gender roles are not being so strictly defined anymore, and people are allowed to hold certain traits without being considered a deviant of their sex, that's a bit to hard to define.
I think when some people say, "be a man" to someone, we're telling them to buck up and do what needs to be done! I think of a soldier, someone whom fights or anyone whom has actually earned the right to be called a man make the term a more positive one. But again, as gender roles are changing and certain traits are not longer strictly defined as being associated with a certain gender, it doesn't carry as much weight but maybe more controversy.
Just like saying, 'like a girl' is no longer being seen as being weak or silly. Young girls who hear this will fight with all their heart and pursue whatever they want with passion and zeal. But when society and often times friends and family then make them believe that being a girl means they should be more dainty and even wimpy, they change from pursuing things passionately to pursuing the things 'girls' are supposed to like.
In general, we need to treat people like people first and foremost. Forget gender when it comes to how we respect others. Everyone deserves equal respect until proven otherwise, just like a douchebag boy doesn't deserve the same respect as a hardworking woman, and vice versa a bitchy girl doesn't deserve the same respect as a hardworking man.
Men and women can both hold positive and negative traits, lets quit associating certain traits exclusively with a certain gender. Both men and women can be strong, just like both men and women can be weak.
There are two different connotations to the phrase. There's "Be a man [as opposed to a woman]," which has sexist implications because it's referring to positive qualities like bravery and toughness as though they're uniquely male. But then there's "Be a man [as opposed to a boy]," which is more about the maturity and responsibility that comes with adulthood.
If you're using the phrase to tell a woman to be more assertive, that would strike me as patronizing and chauvinist. But if you're using the phrase to tell an 18 year old that he has a responsibility towards the child that he fathered with a girl, then I don't have a problem with it. It's all about context.
It's an insult.
Oh, so men can't cry? Men can't be weak? Men can't be scared?
Those are all the times people tell me to "man up", and I tell them "fuck off". If you see men as emotionless powerhouses, that's your mentality and I don't care, as long as you don't expect me to be the same I won't give a crap.
"Be a man" is just you basically saying that I'm not good enough for you. You know what? I don't care. When a woman says it, it hurts me even more.
People expect too much from men... at least me...
I'm not a machine without feelings and giant muscles. It just hurts me when people tell me to "Be a man". Because it makes me feel like I'm worthless and not good enough.
Sorry, I just felt like saying this for some reason.
I agree with you. I also think that the stereotype that women are supposed to be emotional and soft and men should be the opposite is so dumb. I am an emotional person by nature, but I know lots of women who can go through breakups like a freaking boss, just like I know guys who will break down and cry.
Well whenever I hear that I think "What an asshole"
Yeah, the stereotype that women are all emotional and soft is dumb as hell. Same reasons, different stereotype.
It all just boils down to peoples views on genders hundreds of years ago, we're way more advanced now, yet we can't get rid of a stupid thing like stereotypes.
I myself am an emotional guy, and the instant a tear runs down my face I'm viewed as "not a man". Like for example if I get injured emotionally or physically I literally just can't stop the tears, I can maybe hold them in for a bit and act like nothing happened but I can't stop it for a long time.
Well said.
A term that use to really mean something .
"man up!"
me: "fuck you i can't grow a penis"
They are manly traits, and should be traits that all men strive towards.
Age doesn't necessarily make a boy into a man.
What makes boy into a man is by how they conduct themselves.
Of course, these qualities, such as integrity and responsibility, are also things that women should strive towards.
And it's actually these traits, that make civilized society possible.
That's also true.
A man does what needs to be done, even when it is anything but convenient.
Even if he is sick as a dog, or in great pain, if something needs to be done, and if others are depending on him to do it, he does it.
Honestly I just think of Steven Regal.
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There's no such thing as manly traits... the only difference between a man and a woman is what they have between their legs.
Some men strive towards those suposed stereotypical manly traits and I'm not stoping them, all I'm saying is men do not HAVE to strive towards them, men can do whatever the hell they please and they don't have to give into societys stupid stereotypes to be considered men.
The only thing that makes you a man is a dick, end of discussion.
There's always surgery?...
okay I'm leaving
I won't ever undergo surgery to be accepted by people.
That's the spirit.
To me it's just an expression that will become sexist only if the person saying it intends it to. Also, most if not all things you stated that man can do can also be achieved by women.
For example when you say:
That is not something only men do, women do it too. That's actually how they managed to obtain rights and improve their status in the society.
I personally don't get offended by the expression "Be a Man" but it all depends the context in which it is used. If you're only saying it to convey the message that if you're not a man you suck then I don't think it's right. As if the perfect form of human beings is the man and women are flawed and weak and useless. Women are brave and are capable of defending their beliefs with as much passion and determination as a man because all human beings have a brain and have the opportunity to develop it and develop their own beliefs and personality. A quick example would be some women in the middle-east that chose to be part of the army that defends their country against terrorists. These women get injured and are risking their lives just like the men, just for that it would be terribly unfair to claim that women are less capable and have less determination than men.