Please don't be scared to reach out! Most people fail to because they're scared of how their families will react, and while that's okay, sometimes depression gets worse from being pent up. Try taking a small step and tell one person you truly trust, and if you feel the need, tell others too.
If that person chose other people over her family, maybe she's uncomfortable and doesn't know how to handle these situations. Or more likely, she's just being ignorant from not knowing what depression is like. If she's close to you, have a serious talk with her, but otherwise it might be best to let her have her space.
When you call a suicide/depression hotline, there's will be someone at the other end who's willing to lend a listening ear and talk with you. They're trained for this topic, and unless you tell them you're feeling dangerously suicidal, they won't do anything crazy like send an ambulance. At the end of the call, they might refer you to the closest therapy center if you still feel bothered, but that's about it. Here's a hotline specifically for depression too: 1-630-482-9696.
Don't feel afraid to find a new therapist, especially if your current one is giving you bad advice. If they want to see you back at the office and you don't want to go, ignore them; they can't force you to do therapy again. Try https://www.betterhelp.com/. BetterHelp is an anonymous therapy session with professional.
I hope that my story might have helped you some, and again, I'm here if you need to talk.
Wow, thank you very much for sharing your personal experience with me. I appreciate your heartfelt words.
I'm sorry that you have also g… moreone through some very rough experiences and down times... but I'm very glad to know you've been able to pull yourself out of it and hang on.
I guess when I recovered from this pit of depression/anxiety the first time, I believed that I would never have to face that again. In the end, I came out of it feeling like I had a real support system in my life that I could rely on. But then, when it happened again, they all suddenly go away. Or it feels like it at least. I'm too scared to reach out, too scared to try and end up finding that those people will shun me. And that the person who recently hurt me has chosen other people over her own family...
I've never reached out to the suicide hotline. I'm honestly too scared to, and I never felt as if my life was in danger that badly. What happens if you call … [view original content]
I'm really frustrated with social media and how most other people my age get their news and world perspective from Facebook, where most articles are just aiming to get hits and are mostly misleading, biased, or completely false.
There used to be these kinder surprise things from about 2002
Football crazy chocolate mad
Grab a power pod and play football with the l… moreads
Theres a micro star in every pack
A hero in your hand
They're the greatest players from the best teams in the land
I dont even like football
I don't know. But it's a funny game. You'll spend some time playing it and not thinking about existential crisis. I guess you won't find solution to your problem here.
You could do something good for youreselfe like buy something you wanted for a longer time or watch some tv show you like ore play a game you enjoied or do something you are good at, by doing this you will apprecciate yourself for being good at it and maybe you are getting appreciation from other people too. I myself like to write character for the forum of thrones fanfiction or just watch my favorite show. Maybe these things can help
you need to accept and love yourself
honestly, I don't have the faintest idea of how to start doing that. And yeah, actually you wer… moree right on point with saying I sabotaged it.
I remember her telling me I start trouble with her just to feel something. Goddamn, looking back and thinking hard about it, I was (still?) an emotional trainwreck.
Still..with all our fights I never did anything like she did to me. Least I'm loyal. and holy fucking shit. I just realized something. I pushed her away. She's just as fucked up as me, but still I'm the instigator. I remember now. I told her that she's just lying to herself about loving me. At times, I manipulated her..and she did the same to me.
I was so impulsive with her around. It was 3AM one night, we were texting (we talked and texted everyday for 9-13 hours a day minimum), and she said she was hungry. She loved McDonalds. I actually shut off my phone, bought some and went to her house. S… [view original content]
Ih had the same problem with my big brother, he was always better in everything and never had to do anything for school or other things it always came to him. But as time passed on and live got harder he suddenly did not do so well becaus he did not know how to work hard for something and that hit him really hard whereas I on the other hand who had to work hard for everything ( and always will) did not have much prorblem dealing with things like managing money and just working to accomplish something. What I am trying to say is keep on working hard, it wont be easy but because you always had to do it you are having a big advantege over those guys. And also there will always be something you are better at then them you may not have found it yet but you will.
My friends ganges up on me and removed me from our class chat. Damn.
It seems, when they have take me as a substitute, and treat me badly… more when their other, some even more popular friends turn up.
When the more extroverted friends do something cheeky, the teachers do not punish. But when I do, i get punished.
Why is it so unfair? Why are they the ones that gets the better things? 2 even got better grades than me. Why am I fated to always lose to them?
Ih had the same problem with my big brother, he was always better in everything and never had to do anything for school or other things it a… morelways came to him. But as time passed on and live got harder he suddenly did not do so well becaus he did not know how to work hard for something and that hit him really hard whereas I on the other hand who had to work hard for everything ( and always will) did not have much prorblem dealing with things like managing money and just working to accomplish something. What I am trying to say is keep on working hard, it wont be easy but because you always had to do it you are having a big advantege over those guys. And also there will always be something you are better at then them you may not have found it yet but you will.
My friends ganges up on me and removed me from our class chat. Damn.
It seems, when they have take me as a substitute, and treat me badly… more when their other, some even more popular friends turn up.
When the more extroverted friends do something cheeky, the teachers do not punish. But when I do, i get punished.
Why is it so unfair? Why are they the ones that gets the better things? 2 even got better grades than me. Why am I fated to always lose to them?
If you have been insulted every time, it is time to consider the posibility that the common factor is what is igniting the insults—you.
T… morehis does not mean that you are undeniably the reason, since I could not say that given that we have barely interacted; but you have got to analyze what is happening with an impartial view, dropping any impulse to justify yourself. Going by the information you've given, that is the only potential way to prevent receiving more insults during discussions.
For being "friends", they don't sound very friendly. If you can find a way to let go and be friendly yourself, that's something you'll have that they don't. There's nothing you have to gain by comparing yourself to others- you'll become too proud or not proud enough with no balance between the two- but judge yourself by what you want to become. Maybe your teachers are harder on you because they expect more from you as far as your impact on society goes. In other words, they're hard on you because they believe in you. I can't say for sure, but if your peers are causing more stress than they're worth, you'd best find some replacements. Hope things look up!
For being "friends", they don't sound very friendly. If you can find a way to let go and be friendly yourself, that's something you'll have … morethat they don't. There's nothing you have to gain by comparing yourself to others- you'll become too proud or not proud enough with no balance between the two- but judge yourself by what you want to become. Maybe your teachers are harder on you because they expect more from you as far as your impact on society goes. In other words, they're hard on you because they believe in you. I can't say for sure, but if your peers are causing more stress than they're worth, you'd best find some replacements. Hope things look up!
Mobile..release dates..it's bonkers they release a game on one day 22nd November and change mobile/android from 22nd to coming soon..with no explanation. All I'm asking is when is it coming and they're ignoring the fact.
I'm in the living room by myself for Thanksgiving because I wanted to avoid the inevitable political arguments that will ensue and my douchebag cousin, we'll call him Brandon, comes into the room. With his girlfriend. His annual girlfriend, since he has a new one every single year because he's a fucking player. I just wanna look her in the eye, break out my best Rebecca voice and go, "I wouldn't get comfortable if I were you."
Seriously. I wouldn't.
It's a new girl every year. I can guarantee you there will be a completely different lady friend sitting on the same loveseat in 2017.
Brandon, why do you have to be such a douchebag that feels the need to constantly brag about things despite peaking in middle school?
Better yet, what the fuck is up with your tires being too big for your truck? Why is that considered even considered cool? When was it ever cool? Are you compensating for something??
Jesus Christ in a haystack in the middle of snowstorm, how in god's name do we have the same blood?!
Pant Pant
Okay... Okay...I feel better now. I'm so happy this thread exists.
Edit: This dumb bastard also brought his gun. HIS GUN.TO THANKSGIVING DINNER.WHAT THE FUCK?
Motherfucker.
I'm in the living room by myself for Thanksgiving because I wanted to avoid the inevitable political arguments that will en… moresue and my douchebag cousin, we'll call him Brandon, comes into the room. With his girlfriend. His annual girlfriend, since he has a new one every single year because he's a fucking player. I just wanna look her in the eye, break out my best Rebecca voice and go, "I wouldn't get comfortable if I were you."
Seriously. I wouldn't.
It's a new girl every year. I can guarantee you there will be a completely different lady friend sitting on the same loveseat in 2017.
Brandon, why do you have to be such a douchebag that feels the need to constantly brag about things despite peaking in middle school?
Better yet, what the fuck is up with your tires being too big for your truck? Why is that considered even considered cool? When was it ever cool? Are you compensating for something??
Jesus Christ i… [view original content]
Here in Florida, bringing your gun to thanksgiving dinner is normal, as we eat in the woods and hunt for our food the same day.
I'm kidding obviously, but guns here are common. I have 4 in my house right now. I don't see the big deal of wanting to show off a gun. (Unless he brought it loaded/pointing it at people.)
Motherfucker.
I'm in the living room by myself for Thanksgiving because I wanted to avoid the inevitable political arguments that will en… moresue and my douchebag cousin, we'll call him Brandon, comes into the room. With his girlfriend. His annual girlfriend, since he has a new one every single year because he's a fucking player. I just wanna look her in the eye, break out my best Rebecca voice and go, "I wouldn't get comfortable if I were you."
Seriously. I wouldn't.
It's a new girl every year. I can guarantee you there will be a completely different lady friend sitting on the same loveseat in 2017.
Brandon, why do you have to be such a douchebag that feels the need to constantly brag about things despite peaking in middle school?
Better yet, what the fuck is up with your tires being too big for your truck? Why is that considered even considered cool? When was it ever cool? Are you compensating for something??
Jesus Christ i… [view original content]
Motherfucker.
I'm in the living room by myself for Thanksgiving because I wanted to avoid the inevitable political arguments that will en… moresue and my douchebag cousin, we'll call him Brandon, comes into the room. With his girlfriend. His annual girlfriend, since he has a new one every single year because he's a fucking player. I just wanna look her in the eye, break out my best Rebecca voice and go, "I wouldn't get comfortable if I were you."
Seriously. I wouldn't.
It's a new girl every year. I can guarantee you there will be a completely different lady friend sitting on the same loveseat in 2017.
Brandon, why do you have to be such a douchebag that feels the need to constantly brag about things despite peaking in middle school?
Better yet, what the fuck is up with your tires being too big for your truck? Why is that considered even considered cool? When was it ever cool? Are you compensating for something??
Jesus Christ i… [view original content]
Here in Florida, bringing your gun to thanksgiving dinner is normal, as we eat in the woods and hunt for our food the same day.
I'm kiddi… moreng obviously, but guns here are common. I have 4 in my house right now. I don't see the big deal of wanting to show off a gun. (Unless he brought it loaded/pointing it at people.)
Motherfucker.
I'm in the living room by myself for Thanksgiving because I wanted to avoid the inevitable political arguments that will en… moresue and my douchebag cousin, we'll call him Brandon, comes into the room. With his girlfriend. His annual girlfriend, since he has a new one every single year because he's a fucking player. I just wanna look her in the eye, break out my best Rebecca voice and go, "I wouldn't get comfortable if I were you."
Seriously. I wouldn't.
It's a new girl every year. I can guarantee you there will be a completely different lady friend sitting on the same loveseat in 2017.
Brandon, why do you have to be such a douchebag that feels the need to constantly brag about things despite peaking in middle school?
Better yet, what the fuck is up with your tires being too big for your truck? Why is that considered even considered cool? When was it ever cool? Are you compensating for something??
Jesus Christ i… [view original content]
You are such a sweetheart MarijaaNo7... ;A; I'm honestly suprised people have remembered me enough to show any concern. But I really appreci… moreate your kind, supportive, and sweet words as well as kind quirky self.
Before finding friendship, or relationship of any kind with someone, you have to improve relationship with yourself, buddy. You are not worthless, nobody is worthless, stop tearing yourself apart. You judge yourself so hard because you know what's going on in your head 24/7 and compare yourself to others. Nahhh.
This is so true. ;A; I judge myself way to harshly, I always have. But not it's gotten to the point where somethings gotta give, and I have to change. And you're right, about everything. About standing on my own two feet and living my life, controlling my emotions and how I react to the things around me.
I also just realized how short and temporary everything is as well this summer, and it's definitely change… [view original content]
My living situation isn't that great at the moment. There are two people in my life who will ask me about how things are going with my roomies, and if I tell them my honest feelings, they'll tell me I have no right to be upset about the stuff that's going on in my place. They tell me how I'm allowed to feel about the situation. It's extremely frustrating. I'm entitled to my feelings. I know that if I try to tell them that they'll argue with me until the end of time. I could argue my point until I'm blue in the face, and they'll still tell me I'm wrong. After 7 months of it I'm starting to get to the point where I'm feeling bitter and angry towards them. I'm to the point where I'm ready to cut them out of my life because I feel like a silent exit would be better than going out in a ball of flames.
Or, you could just treat the how-things-are-going requests as polite conversation instead of something requiring an honest answer. Kind of like when the store clerk asks how you are doing today, he really doesn't want to hear, "I'M DYING INSIDE!"
Or, you could reply like, "Well, they haven't murdered me in my sleep yet, so things aren't too bad!"
Or find new roomies that you can feel free to tell the questioners good things about.
My living situation isn't that great at the moment. There are two people in my life who will ask me about how things are going with my roomi… morees, and if I tell them my honest feelings, they'll tell me I have no right to be upset about the stuff that's going on in my place. They tell me how I'm allowed to feel about the situation. It's extremely frustrating. I'm entitled to my feelings. I know that if I try to tell them that they'll argue with me until the end of time. I could argue my point until I'm blue in the face, and they'll still tell me I'm wrong. After 7 months of it I'm starting to get to the point where I'm feeling bitter and angry towards them. I'm to the point where I'm ready to cut them out of my life because I feel like a silent exit would be better than going out in a ball of flames.
Or, you could just treat the how-things-are-going requests as polite conversation instead of something requiring an honest answer. Kind of like when the store clerk asks how you are doing today, he really doesn't want to hear, "I'M DYING INSIDE!" Or, you could reply like, "Well, they haven't murdered me in my sleep yet, so things aren't too bad!"
I've tried giving them the generic answer multiple times to avoid dealing with the situation, but they'll poke and prod until they get my real feelings out. When I do tell them how I really feel they'll go into the same song and dance. I feel that if they can't handle my true feelings, they should lay off and stop bugging me about it when we see each other. I'd rather talk about mundane things like how the weather is outside vs. having that same conversation about what's going on at my apartment. And, as a side note, I worked two years as a cashier for a big retail chain. I met a lot of people during that time, and I personally didn't mind people being honest with me about their day.
Or find new roomies that you can feel free to tell the questioners good things about.
I plan on it, but for now I'm unfortunately locked into a lease for a little while still. Someday I'll be able to ride into the sunset and be free.
Well, that is an option.
Or, you could just treat the how-things-are-going requests as polite conversation instead of something requiring… more an honest answer. Kind of like when the store clerk asks how you are doing today, he really doesn't want to hear, "I'M DYING INSIDE!"
Or, you could reply like, "Well, they haven't murdered me in my sleep yet, so things aren't too bad!"
Or find new roomies that you can feel free to tell the questioners good things about.
This is a very moving story you have shared with us about yourself, I really appreciate your sincerity and honesty. Thank you so much, really.
I often wonder if things will really get better, sometimes they do and I feel great, but then one little thing sets me back so bad all I can do is curl up in bed and want to cry and mope, I can't do anything and can hardly function. I'm too scared to do anything, and that's the worst part. I'm too scared to try and make things better, to go out and meet new people, I'm scared to put myself out there because I'm certain people will simply hate me.
I really do appreciate your kind words and help. Thank you.
Hello @SupernovaeHollay,
I'm really sorry to hear about your story. I just want to let you know that I've been there, and I want to share… more my own personal story as well, if you don't mind?
In 2012, the economy in our country started to collapse to the point of most citizens being forced to move to another country. Eventually we figured out that United Kingdom would be the best option, and we decided to settle on London. Ever since I moved on the new city, unfortunately, a lot of problems started to raise up. I couldn't get used to my surroundings. I couldn't speak clearly because my English wasn't fluent, it was very far from that. I didn't know how and where to go. I couldn't go to the gym, do parkour or anything like that which I loved. I was forced to stay in my house with a computer and nothing else. I lost all of my friends. I don't want to sound cocky, but I was always on the "popular crowd" and had plenty of friends, but only few … [view original content]
My living situation isn't that great at the moment. There are two people in my life who will ask me about how things are going with my roomi… morees, and if I tell them my honest feelings, they'll tell me I have no right to be upset about the stuff that's going on in my place. They tell me how I'm allowed to feel about the situation. It's extremely frustrating. I'm entitled to my feelings. I know that if I try to tell them that they'll argue with me until the end of time. I could argue my point until I'm blue in the face, and they'll still tell me I'm wrong. After 7 months of it I'm starting to get to the point where I'm feeling bitter and angry towards them. I'm to the point where I'm ready to cut them out of my life because I feel like a silent exit would be better than going out in a ball of flames.
It's about time, I've been waiting for your answer! Don't worry about being late, it's fine.
"I often wonder if things will really get better, sometimes they do and I feel great, but then one little thing sets me back so bad all I can do is curl up in bed and want to cry and mope, I can't do anything and can hardly function."
It's good. Our surroundings make us react in a certain way, but each of us handles them differently. Sometimes there are feelings that you can't carry for long and you need to let them go. That's okay. Please do not feel sorry or ashamed because of your feelings. Try to focus on the positive side of life. Life has it's ups and it's downs. You can't always win, but you can't always lose!
"I'm too scared to do anything, and that's the worst part. I'm too scared to try and make things better, to go out and meet new people"
It's time to walk out of your comfort zone, then. By changing nothing, nothing changes. Don't think twice and just do it!
"I'm scared to put myself out there because I'm certain people will simply hate me."
Why don't you let them tell you that?
You're welcome, I'm so glad I could help you. Please keep me posted!
I am so sorry about the late response.
This is a very moving story you have shared with us about yourself, I really appreciate your since… morerity and honesty. Thank you so much, really.
I often wonder if things will really get better, sometimes they do and I feel great, but then one little thing sets me back so bad all I can do is curl up in bed and want to cry and mope, I can't do anything and can hardly function. I'm too scared to do anything, and that's the worst part. I'm too scared to try and make things better, to go out and meet new people, I'm scared to put myself out there because I'm certain people will simply hate me.
I really do appreciate your kind words and help. Thank you.
Comments
Please don't be scared to reach out! Most people fail to because they're scared of how their families will react, and while that's okay, sometimes depression gets worse from being pent up. Try taking a small step and tell one person you truly trust, and if you feel the need, tell others too.
If that person chose other people over her family, maybe she's uncomfortable and doesn't know how to handle these situations. Or more likely, she's just being ignorant from not knowing what depression is like. If she's close to you, have a serious talk with her, but otherwise it might be best to let her have her space.
When you call a suicide/depression hotline, there's will be someone at the other end who's willing to lend a listening ear and talk with you. They're trained for this topic, and unless you tell them you're feeling dangerously suicidal, they won't do anything crazy like send an ambulance. At the end of the call, they might refer you to the closest therapy center if you still feel bothered, but that's about it. Here's a hotline specifically for depression too: 1-630-482-9696.
Don't feel afraid to find a new therapist, especially if your current one is giving you bad advice. If they want to see you back at the office and you don't want to go, ignore them; they can't force you to do therapy again. Try https://www.betterhelp.com/. BetterHelp is an anonymous therapy session with professional.
I hope that my story might have helped you some, and again, I'm here if you need to talk.
R.I.P. Biebz.
Ignore my posting time being roughly 15 minutes before the documented time there.
Now this is going to be stuck in my head now
Im annoyed how ive got the manager i dont like on christmas day just wonderful
That means the manager's manager doesn't like him, either.
Wear a Santa hat and see if that makes him jollier.
I don't know. But it's a funny game. You'll spend some time playing it and not thinking about existential crisis. I guess you won't find solution to your problem here.
My friends ganges up on me and removed me from our class chat. Damn.
It seems, when they have take me as a substitute, and treat me badly when their other, some even more popular friends turn up.
When the more extroverted friends do something cheeky, the teachers do not punish. But when I do, i get punished.
Why is it so unfair? Why are they the ones that gets the better things? 2 even got better grades than me. Why am I fated to always lose to them?
You could do something good for youreselfe like buy something you wanted for a longer time or watch some tv show you like ore play a game you enjoied or do something you are good at, by doing this you will apprecciate yourself for being good at it and maybe you are getting appreciation from other people too. I myself like to write character for the forum of thrones fanfiction or just watch my favorite show. Maybe these things can help
Ih had the same problem with my big brother, he was always better in everything and never had to do anything for school or other things it always came to him. But as time passed on and live got harder he suddenly did not do so well becaus he did not know how to work hard for something and that hit him really hard whereas I on the other hand who had to work hard for everything ( and always will) did not have much prorblem dealing with things like managing money and just working to accomplish something. What I am trying to say is keep on working hard, it wont be easy but because you always had to do it you are having a big advantege over those guys. And also there will always be something you are better at then them you may not have found it yet but you will.
But it's my friends now. Not someone close like a brother, who would always side you and help you.
Sounds like you need new friends.
Or people could just stop insulting people? Which comes first- the chicken, or the egg?
For being "friends", they don't sound very friendly. If you can find a way to let go and be friendly yourself, that's something you'll have that they don't. There's nothing you have to gain by comparing yourself to others- you'll become too proud or not proud enough with no balance between the two- but judge yourself by what you want to become. Maybe your teachers are harder on you because they expect more from you as far as your impact on society goes. In other words, they're hard on you because they believe in you. I can't say for sure, but if your peers are causing more stress than they're worth, you'd best find some replacements. Hope things look up!
The people I find interesting and I can relate to and have fun are all like thaat. For some reason.
Yes, the teachers do expect more from me. But that's totally different. TEACHERS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE NEUTRAL AND FAIR.
Can't find those I can have fun with except for these.
Too idealistic.
How will you get everyone to stop insulting others?
I hate...telltales support/customer service so much!!!!! Arghhh....
What's wrong with it?
They seem to answer my questions fast.
Answering questions on facebook/twitter forums about release dates for Batman are blatantly ignoring the issue, and it's not just me.
What issue? The performance issues?
Mobile..release dates..it's bonkers they release a game on one day 22nd November and change mobile/android from 22nd to coming soon..with no explanation. All I'm asking is when is it coming and they're ignoring the fact.
My internet sucks ASSSSSSSSSSSS
Motherfucker.
I'm in the living room by myself for Thanksgiving because I wanted to avoid the inevitable political arguments that will ensue and my douchebag cousin, we'll call him Brandon, comes into the room. With his girlfriend. His annual girlfriend, since he has a new one every single year because he's a fucking player. I just wanna look her in the eye, break out my best Rebecca voice and go, "I wouldn't get comfortable if I were you."
Seriously. I wouldn't.
It's a new girl every year. I can guarantee you there will be a completely different lady friend sitting on the same loveseat in 2017.
Brandon, why do you have to be such a douchebag that feels the need to constantly brag about things despite peaking in middle school?
Better yet, what the fuck is up with your tires being too big for your truck? Why is that considered even considered cool? When was it ever cool? Are you compensating for something??
Jesus Christ in a haystack in the middle of snowstorm, how in god's name do we have the same blood?!
Pant
Pant
Okay... Okay...I feel better now. I'm so happy this thread exists.
Edit: This dumb bastard also brought his gun. HIS GUN. TO THANKSGIVING DINNER. WHAT THE FUCK?
Why the FUCK would someone bring a gun to Thanksgiving?
But anyways, I'm sorry to hear your Thanksgiving isn't going good.
Here in Florida, bringing your gun to thanksgiving dinner is normal, as we eat in the woods and hunt for our food the same day.
I'm kidding obviously, but guns here are common. I have 4 in my house right now. I don't see the big deal of wanting to show off a gun. (Unless he brought it loaded/pointing it at people.)
Has Brandon not killed you yet?
No gunshot wounds for me. But I ate too much
All good mate. Food heals all wounds
Indeed it does.
Welcome to my world, mate. I gotta use TWC all the fucking time.
nvm, didn't read correctly.
Are these actual girlfriends or the kind of girlfriend you pay for?
Lol, they're legit girlfriends. They just don't last long.
This has happened 5 years in a row.
Sorry for the late reply;---; I haven't checked my feed in 3 years.
YOURE MAKING ME BLUSH OMG THANKS >///<
Just keep going!
My living situation isn't that great at the moment. There are two people in my life who will ask me about how things are going with my roomies, and if I tell them my honest feelings, they'll tell me I have no right to be upset about the stuff that's going on in my place. They tell me how I'm allowed to feel about the situation. It's extremely frustrating. I'm entitled to my feelings.
I know that if I try to tell them that they'll argue with me until the end of time. I could argue my point until I'm blue in the face, and they'll still tell me I'm wrong. 
After 7 months of it I'm starting to get to the point where I'm feeling bitter and angry towards them. I'm to the point where I'm ready to cut them out of my life because I feel like a silent exit would be better than going out in a ball of flames.
Well, that is an option.
Or, you could just treat the how-things-are-going requests as polite conversation instead of something requiring an honest answer. Kind of like when the store clerk asks how you are doing today, he really doesn't want to hear, "I'M DYING INSIDE!"
Or, you could reply like, "Well, they haven't murdered me in my sleep yet, so things aren't too bad!"
Or find new roomies that you can feel free to tell the questioners good things about.
I've tried giving them the generic answer multiple times to avoid dealing with the situation, but they'll poke and prod until they get my real feelings out. When I do tell them how I really feel they'll go into the same song and dance. I feel that if they can't handle my true feelings, they should lay off and stop bugging me about it when we see each other. I'd rather talk about mundane things like how the weather is outside vs. having that same conversation about what's going on at my apartment. And, as a side note, I worked two years as a cashier for a big retail chain. I met a lot of people during that time, and I personally didn't mind people being honest with me about their day.
I plan on it, but for now I'm unfortunately locked into a lease for a little while still. Someday I'll be able to ride into the sunset and be free.
I am so sorry about the late response.
This is a very moving story you have shared with us about yourself, I really appreciate your sincerity and honesty. Thank you so much, really.
I often wonder if things will really get better, sometimes they do and I feel great, but then one little thing sets me back so bad all I can do is curl up in bed and want to cry and mope, I can't do anything and can hardly function. I'm too scared to do anything, and that's the worst part. I'm too scared to try and make things better, to go out and meet new people, I'm scared to put myself out there because I'm certain people will simply hate me.
I really do appreciate your kind words and help. Thank you.
Welp, simple solution:
...Kill your roomies.
8)
It's about time, I've been waiting for your answer! Don't worry about being late, it's fine.
"I often wonder if things will really get better, sometimes they do and I feel great, but then one little thing sets me back so bad all I can do is curl up in bed and want to cry and mope, I can't do anything and can hardly function."
It's good. Our surroundings make us react in a certain way, but each of us handles them differently. Sometimes there are feelings that you can't carry for long and you need to let them go. That's okay. Please do not feel sorry or ashamed because of your feelings. Try to focus on the positive side of life. Life has it's ups and it's downs. You can't always win, but you can't always lose!
"I'm too scared to do anything, and that's the worst part. I'm too scared to try and make things better, to go out and meet new people"
It's time to walk out of your comfort zone, then. By changing nothing, nothing changes. Don't think twice and just do it!
"I'm scared to put myself out there because I'm certain people will simply hate me."
Why don't you let them tell you that?
You're welcome, I'm so glad I could help you.
Please keep me posted!