Monkey Island Caption Contest #7: A Rubber Chicken with a Caption in the Middle

Welcome to the 7th Monkey Island caption contest. Here are last week's winners:
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Governor: Guard!!
Guard: Yes sir?
Governor: What...what is that?
Guard: It appears to be your foot sir.
Governor: My what?!
Guard: Your foot sir.
Governor: Interesting. And what does a foot do?
Guard: It's used for walking sir.
Governor: Walking you say?
Guard: Yes sir.
Governor: I see...
*pauses*
Governor: Can I eat it?
Guard: I'm afraid not sir.
This week in Secrets in the World of Monkey Island! The Secret Underneath Governor Phatt's Blankets!

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Guybrush: Oh no!
Phatt: Are you terrified? Are you gonna break into tears knowing that the Dread Pirate LeChuck is back?
Guybrush: No. I'm terrified of how fat your gut is.
Phatt: Oh, that's not my stomach.
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Guybrush: And then he pulled away the blankets!

What could it be! A llama? An orthodontist!? Stay tuned to find out.

The winners get:
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An avatar of a facepalming monkey!

The Hall of Fame:
puzzlebox x2
hplikelike x2
Thriftweed Fancy Pants x2
SilverWolfPet x1
skitty85 x1
prizna x1
TomPravetz x1
Jen Kollic x1
Secret Fawful x1

PM me if you have a good picture for the next contest. May be fanart too, as long as it's your own.

Comments

  • edited February 2010
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  • edited February 2010
    apenpaap wrote: »
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    I SAID WE'RE NOT GOING TO DISNEY LAND!!
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    Beware of Copyright Infringement for I am not quite Dracula but more of a combination of several B-Movie Horror Characters, WoooooooH
  • edited February 2010
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    Guybrush: Um Mr Winslow?

    Winslow: Quiet captain Threepwood, I need to get that map back, because SOMEONE couldn't hold on to it tight enough when there was a gust of wind.

    Guybrush: I'm sorry but it is just a map.

    Winslow: JUST A MAP?!! HOW DARE YOU TALK THAT WAY ABOUT MY MAP!!
  • edited February 2010
    apenpaap wrote: »
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    Guybrush: Are we there yet?

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    Rule 34; No exceptions Hey! That looks a lot like the thing on my self! Scary!
  • edited February 2010
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    Winslow: When this baby hits 88 miles per hour, you're gonna see some serious s**t!
  • edited February 2010
    apenpaap wrote: »
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    Escape from Monkey Island is looming...
  • edited February 2010
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    Winslow: We'll see who looks smug when I knock YOU back off the boat!

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    Mighty Pirating may not be for everyone, Symptoms of wussy pirating may include being scared of your own mighty shadow
  • edited February 2010
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    Connecting his TV to the beamer had been a great idea, except the commercials always scared him half to death.
  • edited February 2010
    Woot! I won one! :D

    Caption Number One.
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    Shadow: Ask Me About A Vampyre Story!
    Cryptkeeper: I played it! It was beautifully drawn but unresolved!
    Shadow: Then ask me about Tales of Monkey Island!
    Cryptkeeper: I didn't like the 3D graphics and the removal of the point and click interface!
    Shadow: THEN ASK ME ABOUT SAM AND MAX: SEASON THREE!!!
    Cryptkeeper: I never played the games or saw the Animated Series!
    Shadow: THEN DIE!!!!

    Caption Number Two. (This is in no way meant as racism nor meant to mock black people. If it offends anybody I'll remove it.)
    Secrets in the World of Monkey Island - The Secret of The Phatt Island Naval Officials
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    Guybrush: Okay I have Good News and I have Bad News.
    Winslow: What's the good news?
    Guybrush: The naval officer isn't taking our booty. He just pulled us over for speeding.
    Winslow: We should do our best not to upset him. The bad news?
    Guybrush: It's because you're black.
    Winslow: Fire all cannons.
  • edited February 2010
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    Guybrush: Uh, Winslow... I know this ship is constructed from the garbage the people on the island have collected, but...
    Winslow: Yes, sir! It wasn't an easy task.
    Guybrush: And I see there is a bowling pin and a bottle on the wheel...
    Winslow: Yes, sir! Well tied up!
    Guybrush: So... Were you guys that desperate to find a stick rather than tying that pink... unmentionable to the bottom of the wheel?
    Winslow: I... am trying not to look at it, sir!
  • edited February 2010
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    Winslow: Sir, could you stop looking down there?

    Guybrush: Why are you wearing lady's underwear?

    Winslow: I said STOP LOOKING!!

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    Murray: You're not going to win this contest!

    Cryptkeeper: NOOOOooooooooo!

    Murray: Bwahahahahaha!
  • edited February 2010
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    Mort: What do you want from me?
    Guybrush: I'm selling these fine leather jackets
    Mort: Oooohhh! What do I get if I pay in pieces of eight?
    Guybrush: This nifty scythe I just cut my pants open with, *papishu!*...
    Murray: ...guarantee that this leather comes from the evilest pirate hides you've ever seen in the Caribbean; and eternal torment and suffering... free of charge!
    Bwahahahaha!
  • edited February 2010
    apenpaap wrote: »
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    Guybrush (thinks): Hey, Winslow's got a tattoo of *me* on his arse!
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    George Lucas: Yes, I think it's time for another special edition - "Curse of Monkey Island" could do with some work. Now, I want you to reinstate all the deleted material mentioned in the strategy guide.... and then digitally replace all the guns and cannons and swords and injury-causing and violence with sunshine, lollipops and rainbows....
    Programmer: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! MUMMMMMMMY! THERE'S A MONSTER IN MY BEDROOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • edited February 2010
    apenpaap wrote: »
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    Winslow: I'm sorry, Threepwood... But this is mutiny, I am now the Captain!
    Guybrush: ...What did I do?
    Winslow: You didn't point at the map...
    Guybrush: and...?
    Winslow: I LOVE THAT MAP, SIR!
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    apenpaap wrote: »
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    Mort: Can you tell me my future?
    Ghost: THE ADVENTURE GAME GENRE WILL DIE OUT, AND ALL THAT LUCASARTS WILL MAKE IS... STAR WARS GAMES!
    Mort: NOOOOOOOO!
    Ghost: AND NEVER MORE WILL YOU FIND SHOES THAT MA...
    Guybrush: Murray, shut up!
  • edited February 2010
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    Wait, are you one of those guys who sleep in the nude? I just don't want that sheet to come off...
  • edited February 2010
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    Following the caption contest on his beamer was a bad idea.
  • edited February 2010
    apenpaap wrote: »
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    Guybrush: Uh, Winslow? Why is your cravat stuck in the wheel?
    Winslow: Really, you don't want to know.
  • edited February 2010
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    "B-But she's his sister!"
  • edited February 2010
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  • edited February 2010
    apenpaap wrote: »
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    Guybrush: Hum, nice wheels...
    Winslow: Wheels? But there´s only one wheel here, sir.
    Guybrush: Oh, right....

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    You can't boogie with the boogeyman,
    Hold out any way you can,
    But don't mess with the boogeyman
    or you´ll never find socks that match again
  • edited February 2010
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  • edited February 2010
    apenpaap wrote: »

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    Murray:Interior crocodile alligator
    I drive a Chevrolet movie theater.

    If you don't get it, watch this
  • edited February 2010
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    Guybrush: Mr. Winslow, I can't find our map. I looked for it all around the ship and... *pause*
    Winslow: Sir?
    G: Why did you stick it to your butt?
    W: I didn't, sir. It must've been the wind that blew it down there.
    G: Yes you did. You taped it.
    W: Then... Then it must've been Morgan.
    G: Well, why don't you get it off?
    W: I can't, sir. Can't let go off the wheel. We'd capsize.
    G: *sigh* So what do want me to do?
    W: Point at it.
    G: WHAT?!?
    W: Point at the map, sir.
    G: While it's in your butt?
    W: Yes, sir. There's no time to lose now.
    G: Err...

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    Gravedigger: And what happened next? Did he actually do it?
    Shadow: I'll let you take a guess.
    G: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
    S: See, the scariest things CMI has to offer are only shadow monsters.
  • edited February 2010
    I can't top these captions for Guybrush and Winslow:

    Winslow: When this baby hits 88 miles per hour, you're gonna see some serious s**t!
    Trenchfoot wrote: »

    Winslow: Sir, could you stop looking down there?

    Guybrush: Why are you wearing lady's underwear?

    Winslow: I said STOP LOOKING!!

    But here's my entry for the other one:

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    Caption: Mort the Gravedigger and Nor Treblig swap scary stories.
    Nor: "...and then he combined the laxative with the manatee's stomach bile!"
    Mort: *Gasp* No!
  • edited February 2010
    That's all, folks! New contest is here.
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