How do you help people with Depression? Advice severely needed!
So, I don't want to pour it all on the line for everyone to know my business, but I will say that as the title implies, I need help.
I have two people in particular, people in my own family whom are dealing with serious clinical depression. One of them, is pretty much ruined another family member with their issues, and no one knows what to do anymore.
I want to help people I love, these people with depression, but their's nothing I can do. Ultimately, we're scared one of them will kill them self.
I need advice from anyone who has dealt with clinical depression in their own lives, be it family, friends, anyone close or someone you love or loved. I don't know what to do anymore, I'm scared that soon I'm going to lose someone, and there's nothing I can do. I know this is a severe topic to post somewhere like this, but generally y'all provide good advice or viewpoints for me to consider or try out. I just need to know that I'm not the only person who deals with this sort of thing.
Comments
If they've got clinical depression then they're getting professional help surely..
Professional meaning pills but the pills are no longer part of the equation. So, I don't know what else to do to try and help.
Oh My God Hollay, I hope your Family is alright, I have never really been depressed so I might not know about this stuff as other people do but don't be afraid to talk to your family about this and show them how concerned you are, Whoever the family member is they will probably not hurt you by hurting them self if they understand how it effects the whole family, them self, and you. I would recommend that your family members get help or maybe go on vacation or find some way to relieve this Stress but I think getting help would be the best option. It might depend if this is a temporary state or if it's more of a long term thing for this individual but I hope you and your family will be alright and sorry that I don't know that much about this Stuff.
Seek professional help.
Ah sorry, in the UK we have a healthcare system which provides psychological help for those with mental illness.
If they've got clinical depression then they already have sought professional help.
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As someone who has admittedly dealt with depression before, I would say that depression is something than can be pretty difficult to beat on your own. It can lead to someone completely shutting everyone else out, including the people they care about. The best thing that you can do is to make yourself available to them, and to let them know that you care, and will help them without judgement. You may not be able to solve their issues, but just being there can be everything.
Once you've figured it out let me know. I've been battling depression for years. Things that often help me is being around my family, friends, and taking medication.
My wife has a lot of experience with this sort of thing, and I showed her your message.
She says the first thing to do is examine or determine what started their depression. For example, was there a major event, like losing a loved one, or was it gradual, like after a bad break-up, or related to self-esteem, like being bullied?
We don't need complete details, but if you can give us the basics of what was going on when the depression started, we might be able to give you more direction of what to do.
Hope we can help.
I've dealt with depression before, in fact I'm almost fully recovered from it.
Believe it or not but the foods you eat can aid in causing depression, eating food with more protein and less fat and sugar can actually make people feel happier and at the same time healthier, adding to that exercise can also aid some people through depression.
Having a good amount of sleep can really help people get into a good mood, too much or too little sleep is not only bad for you but can help you feel more depressed.
Listening to some good, relaxing music and even playing or watching movies that make you laugh help allot as well, really just try getting someone with depression into a good mood, these can prevent people from grieving and relieve stress.
Being with people you like, people who make you happy, can help you get through depression, sometimes it's just a good feeling to tell someone all your problems and really helps with stress relief.
If worse comes to worse you can always try hypnotizing someone out of depression, self-hypnotization is better, at least for those who struggle greatly with depression but I wouldn't recommend anti-depressant pills as they do more harm than good really.
Sometimes the 'cure' for someone's depression is the root of it, what caused this person's depression may help them feel less depressed.
But know that people don't get out of depression quickly and easily, it takes time, someone has to want to feel happy and feel happiness at the same time but no one is always happy.
i'd say cognitive behavioural therapy helps the most universally however really it s very individual condition sometimes the cause is biological and requires pharmacological help and sometimes its lack of social support or even co morbid with another condition.
Sorry that I can't solve your problem but I would like to share my story.
So, I was very depressed yesterday, for some unknown reason, and I decided to try to make myself happy watching my favorite show GoT. I sat at my laptop and opened episode 3x9. Needless too say, I cried myself to sleep.
Self Medicate like the rest of us.
It isn't that hard PPL!
I deal with it by thinking hopeful, I refuse to take medicine or even go to a doctor or psychiatrist to have me checked out.
The person I'm asking for help for stopped taking their medicine because they don't want to rely on pills. I guess what I want to know is how do I even help someone with depression. I know the whole, be there for them and be patient etc. but when they ignore you and won't let you get close to know what's bothering them. I just don't know how to help anymore.
It's a chemical issue, but the way they were raised didn't help either. A physically and mentally abusive parent was mostly what has caused their anger issues, but the depression is really chemical.
Like, it really just comes and goes and we can't decide what the catalyst that sets it off. Mostly its when they get mad, and then their anger escalates to a point where we can't even speak to them.
I'm sorry to hear that Dalton... :<
I'm glad you have a family and some friends who are willing to help you in your rough times, most people don't even have that much.
We are there for them, but it's just the same thing over and over and they never try to change. It's getting to the point that when they have their episodes or depression, it makes me have panic attacks because it can't escalate so quickly and so badly.
The catalyst to determine it is not always tangible. It can be as simple as a person or as complex as a memory. So the first thing you do when the symptoms present themselves is to examine their surroundings, who is with them, what things are happening around them. Sometimes they can inadvertently give you your answer as to what is triggering them from what they say or do, or their surroundings. For example. is it a bad weather day, significant date, or is there someone bothering them, when they get mad or escalate? Do they say things like, "Nobody ever listens to me" or "No one loves me" or "I can't do anything right" consistently when they get mad?
Monitor their situation in this way for at least a couple of weeks (unless you don't see them often) and get at least a week's worth of comparison so you can see what matches up. Then you can determine if there's a consistent pattern.
Wife recommends What You Can Feel You Can Heal by John Gray (the same guy who wrote the Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus book). It's marketed as a relationship book, but it defines how you feel things and how you heal things with any relationship from parent/child to friend to spouse.
Medical Marijuana helps me.
Personally i believe you can't do anything to help other than you are doing, if it gets too much take a step back. You can only lead a horse to water, can't make it drink.
Speaking from personal experience, a lot of depression is cognative; there is a tendancy to attribute it too much to biochemical factors, namely medicalize rather than deal with the underlying issues, and the person can't really get better without fixing those. You mentioned family stuff, both in childhood and in adulthood, and oftentimes childhood attachment patterns repeat themselves in adulthood. I can get into that another time if you want, but as to the issue it hand it seems the best course is simply to listen; do not judge, do not try and fix, listen to what the person has to say and let them know that you are there with them. Again, I can't deal with it because I don't know the person, but a lot of times, when people say they don't want people, they really do. They don't want people up in their business, or to force them to tell them how they feel, but just to know they're there. It's a hard balance. (btw, if you really believe there is a suicide risk, I imagine you can try calling the suicide hotline to get advice on how to handle it; it's not as good as the person talking themselves, but don't think of it as a wasted call). Let them know that you're there, and, depending on how the insurance situation is, do try and get them treated professionally. Therapists can be there unconditionally, and can offer advice in ways untrained people can't. The main thing is, the person can't be given advice on how to think or behave (which is why therapists don't give any); they have to believe and feel it for themselves.
Edit: Also, a lot of people with depression tend to try and hind it, because we feel embarrassed about how we've changed, and we want to try and live well for the people we care about, and we can't realliy show how we feel very well because we're afraid of showing that and making people feel sad or burdened. (Again, that's not a clinical analysis, just a personal observation).