Weird Stories About Your Family
I have a whole bunch of these. First, I will begin by talking about my great grandma, and stuff she does. Right now, she is 89 years old.
Here is a brief list of stuff she does, or has done in the past, with specific examples;
- She pretends to have Alzheimer's disease to freak everybody out. Like one time two years ago she didn't want to go to the doctor but my uncle made her go anyway and when the doctor started asking her questions to test her memory they asked who the president was and she said FDR.
2.) My grandma has diabetes, and one time she tried to eat a small candy but my uncle wouldn't let her have it so when he went outside to mow the lawn he came back and she ate all of the candy just to make him mad.
3.) One time I tried to take bread away from her and she threatened to chop my hands off.
4.) Another time, she was about to eat a cupcake and my uncle started freaking out and was like, "Why are you eating that?!?!?" and she said, "Eating what" and then took a bite out of it right in front of him.
5.) My uncle has a collie named Willow, and Willow was laying on the bed and my grandma saw her on the bed and said, "Get off the bed you moron!" so Willow went to sit on the couch and a minute later my grandma was like, "Get off the couch you moron!" so the dog went on the bed again.
Oh, and here is a discussion between my mother, younger sister, and a friend of my dad who lives here. I already posted it somewhere else but it inspired this thread so I have to include it, it just wouldn't be right not to;
Mom: "Nothing good will come out of either of you having a big giant sword."
J: "Imagine if someone broke in here though we could hit them with a big giant sword and then their head would be laying on the ground."
Mom: "No. You are not getting a big giant sword, half of a big giant sword, you are not getting two big giant swords, you are not sharing a big giant sword."
Sister: "All we'd have to do is call that guy who makes big giant swords!"
Mom: "No!"
You see, they were apparently watching this show about big giant swords, (It is a thing; http://www.discovery.com/tv-shows/big-giant-swords/ ) and I went downstairs a few minutes ago and they were still discussing all the things they want to destroy with a big giant sword.
Okay. That is it for now. Tell me your things too, if you want to.
Comments
On the very day my dad got his braces off, he's hit in the mouth with a hockey puck. Guess what he had to get put back on?
Also, I believe someone told me that Clyde Barrow (Bonnie and Clyde) is a distant relative on my father's side.
I've told this story MANYYYYY times but my BROS ARE MY FAMILY so I have to tell it once more....
So one day I was hanging with my Bros and you know, we were chilling out and stuff but these other guys came to where we were and they were arguing about something, I don't know and then one had a HEART ATTACK, Me and my Bros thought "This ain't our business" so we just chilled out and hoped that everything would go well for the group.....THEN this dude with a Mustache picked me up and SLAMMED ME on top of this old guy, I think he was the one with the Heart Attack and he never got up after I was slammed on him......... The group later left and I was shocked but my bros were like "CONGRATS BRO123! THAT WAS EPIC!" And they were all cheering me on but then my Bro 305 came on in and was like "GUYS! I GOT A CHICK TO LICK ME! She kinda tasted like a Clementine.... And that bastard..... stole my moment....
I'm related to Charles Dickens, guess that's something.