That Guy
I'm bored and I feel like being an ass, so, who are the kinds of people that usually show up at any sort of group outing or party with more than (let's say) six or seven people and you just want to say 'dude, don't be that guy.' Here's my two big ones:
1) The guy with the guitar - get too many people together for too much time, and somebody will eventually whip out a guitar. It's always an acoustic and half the time they can't play it that well either. Not only do they oblige you to listen, but far too often you're 'encouraged' to sing along. There's a fine line between 'tender and soulful' and 'obnoxious.' No, we don't want to hear you fuck up Coldplay. We don't want to hear you play Coldplay right either. If you enjoy playing the guitar, and even if you have friends who like to listen to you, fine; but don't assume that a large group of acquantences wants anything to do with it. They're surpassed by far by their cousins who have a eukalele, but the latter is far much rarer.
2) The professional photographer - Everybody knows this guy. He's spent over $1000 for a Nikon camera with multiple lenses and all the bells and whistles. He never does photography for an actual job, and rarely even goes out and does photography as a hobby. All that money and effort is put in to having the greatest pictures of food and random people hanging out on facebook. The obscene waste isn't the annoying part though. What ticks me off is that this guy gets out of his chair, walks back and forth around the table taking dozens of pictures of everything like a twelve year old who just got taken off ritalin. Sometimes they'll even stop you in the middle of conversation so they can get a picture of you and the people you're talking to together. Even if they don't, you can't help but feel like you're subject of some bizarre safari - "Look at the human in their natural habitat as they eat and talk to each other, a ritual they refer to as 'socializing." You're missing out on everything if you can only see it through a viewfinder. Just sit down, shut up, talk to other people, and enjoy the party like a normal person.
Comments
I am that Guitar guy,
The guy that tries to make every conversation about whatever their obsession is. Usually politics. I used to have a friend that could take any topic, ANY topic, and turn it into a conversation about the book series Dune. I know more about Dune than about how to live life and I never read any of the books. Nobody gives a crap about Dune, or about how you think Obama is trying to take your guns. These things have nothing to do with anything everyone else was talking about.
The guy who thinks they can be cool and attract girls by acting disinterested in everything. LAAAAME!