Kenny is love. Kenny is life.

edited April 2014 in The Walking Dead

I was only 9 years old

I loved Kenny so much, I had all the mullets and hats

I pray to Kenny every night before bed, thanking him for the life I've been given

"Kenny is love" I say; "Kenny is life"

My dad hears me and calls me a faggot

I know he was just jealous of my devotion for Kenny

I called him a cunt

He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep

I'm crying now, and my face hurts

I lay in bed and it's really cold

Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me

It's Kenny

I am so happy

He whispers into my ear "You're gonna ride my boat."

He grabs me with his powerful redneck hands and puts me down onto my hands and knees

I'm ready

I spread my ass-cheeks for Kenny

He penetrates my butt-hole

It hurts so much but I do it for Kenny

I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water

I push against his force

I want to please Kenny

He screeches something about boats and mustaches as he fills my butt with his love

My dad walks in

Kenny looks him straight in the eyes and says "Fuckin' urbans.''

Kenny leaves through my window

Kenny is love. Kenny is life.

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Comments

  • edited April 2014

    Dude, I'm....kind of disgusted but at the same time I'm laughing my ass off.

    Well played,I guess...?

  • Kenny is lies.

  • If anyone is heavily weirded out by this, it came from this video. Doesn't make it any less creepy though.

  • edited so its now easy to read

  • Gaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

  • I...

    Um...

    Uh...

    I've got nothing.

  • Still a better love story then twilight.

  • Alt text To this thread.

  • edited April 2014

    I agree.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YaG5SAw1n0c

    Wow so people down voting people who don't like this? I'm confused. Sure its a little funny but overall its kind of disgusting.

    X3Holy3 posted: »

    Gaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

  • Funny, I guess, but now...

    Alt text

  • Holy shit I love that. I'm sure I've seen an actual model swap of Bigby on the pole in EP2

    Funny, I guess, but now...

  • Yeah, but that's him with his shirt on.

    Talimancer posted: »

    Holy shit I love that. I'm sure I've seen an actual model swap of Bigby on the pole in EP2

  • Man I love Archer, I haven't watched it in ages either. Might get at it again soon.

    Talimancer posted: »

    To this thread.

  • After actually reading the post I've come to a revelation. Kenny fanboys suck.

    Viva-La-Lee posted: »

    Kenny is lies.

  • NO THEY DON'T!

    Viva-La-Lee posted: »

    After actually reading the post I've come to a revelation. Kenny fanboys suck.

  • Face it brah you'll never grow a stache as powerful as Kenny's.

    Viva-La-Lee posted: »

    After actually reading the post I've come to a revelation. Kenny fanboys suck.

  • I've got proof....

    NO THEY DON'T!

  • I don't need one. I've got these great things called brain cells.

    MayorMilk posted: »

    Face it brah you'll never grow a stache as powerful as Kenny's.

  • ur dunn kid do u even lift ur fuct now i lift 50 pounds i got ur info fite me irl fukken fag gona fuk u up

    But actually being serious, I admit some Kenny fanboys are fucking stupid, but I just really like his character and thought posting this would be funny.

    Viva-La-Lee posted: »

    I don't need one. I've got these great things called brain cells.

  • u wot m8 il fokn rek u sware on me mum don u talk sht bout kenny

    Flawed characters with actual personality > Superhero characters with no personality.

    Everyone can have an opinion, no need for this to turn into a flame war.

    MayorMilk posted: »

    ur dunn kid do u even lift ur fuct now i lift 50 pounds i got ur info fite me irl fukken fag gona fuk u up But actually being serious, I

  • Well, this is a knockoff of a 'fanfic' of sorts I guess about Shrek. It's basically exactly the same only with Shrek references instead of Kenny references. I'm not sure where that emerged but it's a meme.

    Viva-La-Lee posted: »

    After actually reading the post I've come to a revelation. Kenny fanboys suck.

  • edited April 2014

    Flawed characters with actual personality > Superhero characters with no personality.

    If that was a bumper sticker, I'd stick it right here on my desk.

    Dragonleaf posted: »

    u wot m8 il fokn rek u sware on me mum don u talk sht bout kenny Flawed characters with actual personality > Superhero characters with no personality. Everyone can have an opinion, no need for this to turn into a flame war.

  • You have an interesting sense of humor. I commend your.... originality.

    MayorMilk posted: »

    ur dunn kid do u even lift ur fuct now i lift 50 pounds i got ur info fite me irl fukken fag gona fuk u up But actually being serious, I

  • edited April 2014

    Alt text

  • Nah they don't suck, that's too mean.

    It's just lots of them unfortunately post too much about him on the forums.

    The worst are those who accept everything he does as gospel and think he is ALWAYS right.

    Like dudes, Kenny is human, not perfect! His humanity is something you're supposed to like about him, you shouldn't just blindly follow everything he does!

    Also, the problem is mainly caused by a few heretic supporters on the forum: they misrepresent his real fanbase unfairly.

    Viva-La-Lee posted: »

    After actually reading the post I've come to a revelation. Kenny fanboys suck.

  • That is... beautiful. :')

  • edited April 2014

    What is this? I don't even...

    image

  • Then Shrek fanboys also suck.

    Well, this is a knockoff of a 'fanfic' of sorts I guess about Shrek. It's basically exactly the same only with Shrek references instead of Kenny references. I'm not sure where that emerged but it's a meme.

  • If you do any others replace Onion with Duck

  • No. Suck is a fine word to use. But any fanboys suck, doesn't matter what they fan over haha. It just so happens that Kenny fanboys are the most prevalent on the forum, as you said. I'm fine with fans of his character.

    Flog61 posted: »

    Nah they don't suck, that's too mean. It's just lots of them unfortunately post too much about him on the forums. The worst are those

  • "Fuckin' Urbans,"

    I'm dying right now.

  • Alt text

    Tenmile posted: »

    "Fuckin' Urbans," I'm dying right now.

  • False proof. Manufactured in a Clean Shaven Supremacy group.

    Viva-La-Lee posted: »

    I've got proof....

  • Dude, there's no point to really argue anymore, if you don't like Kenny or his fans you shouldn't of even come to this thread in the first place. People fanboy over him because he's a cool character, case closed.

    Viva-La-Lee posted: »

    No. Suck is a fine word to use. But any fanboys suck, doesn't matter what they fan over haha. It just so happens that Kenny fanboys are the most prevalent on the forum, as you said. I'm fine with fans of his character.

  • Proof is proof :p

    Talimancer posted: »

    False proof. Manufactured in a Clean Shaven Supremacy group.

  • Foking the Dark age of the Law or what. The Mustache shall prevail.

    Viva-La-Lee posted: »

    Proof is proof

  • What makes you think I don't like Kenny or his fans?

    I find the fanboys annoying.

    MayorMilk posted: »

    Dude, there's no point to really argue anymore, if you don't like Kenny or his fans you shouldn't of even come to this thread in the first place. People fanboy over him because he's a cool character, case closed.

  • The mustache has already been defeated.

    Talimancer posted: »

    Foking the Dark age of the Law or what. The Mustache shall prevail.

  • i saw the shrek one a few days before this so i had to put gloves on before i clicked this thread

This discussion has been closed.