Sorry about my earlier vent. Jealousy got the best of me since I worked pretty hard on a story. After reading my friend's fanfic for a bit I feel a little better knowing they're doing well in their's and besides the fact it's pretty darn good.
So I went to re-watch Star Wars with my dad, and this has been eating me up for a long time so I need to vent about this.
Why would anyone ship Reylo???
I can understand if the people who are shipping it are abuse survivors using the ship for Coping Mechanism, but what's concerning is that most of them aren't and are romanticizing abuse. Let alone I've seen one of them go as low into racism by referring to Finn as "cole boy" because their scared of Finnrey (a.k.a an interracial representation, where it showed chemistry from those two characters since they met and most likely going to happen anyway) becoming canon and shitting on people who are triggered by the topic of abuse, like myself.
Also overall in the film Kylo threatens Rey, gets into a fight with Rey, kills Han Solo, a.k.a Rey's father figure and his dad, also there is a possibility Rey being Kylo's cousin since it's more than likely that she's Luke's daughter. It baffles me that people want Rey to be used for Kylo's redemption when -if he ever does get a redemption- it's more possible going to be Leia, his mother who wants him to return to the light.
It's just like Rhack all over again where the abusive ship is the most popular ship in the fandom and it's really bugging me.
I took the interrogation as a rape threat until I realized he did his weird mindreading. It's, well, interesting. I can't understand why it exists, but the world is a strange place.
Read this instantly taught tumblr so I searched the term reylo top results tumblr
There is you're answer never try to use logic against tumblr you will only get you're head messed up
Look at fifty shades of grey one of the best selling romance novels ever for women written by a woman inspired by her fantasy's the book is all about an abusive and dominating lead male
Joker and Harley Quinn no one bates an eyelid that's all abuse no one ever questions it XD
I took the interrogation as a rape threat until I realized he did his weird mindreading. It's, well, interesting. I can't understand why it exists, but the world is a strange place.
I did find that ship to be odd. They are enemies so to be in a romantic relationship together makes me scratch my head.
Plus I don't want incest, Leia unknowingly kissing her brother is bad enough for me. .-.
This! And it's funny you mention 50 Shades of Grey because a lot of women went to look for their own Christian Grey, and successfully did, ended up in an abusive relationship.
Read this instantly taught tumblr so I searched the term reylo top results tumblr
There is you're answer never try to use logic against t… moreumblr you will only get you're head messed up
Look at fifty shades of grey one of the best selling romance novels ever for women written by a woman inspired by her fantasy's the book is all about an abusive and dominating lead male
Joker and Harley Quinn no one bates an eyelid that's all abuse no one ever questions it XD
I'm not surprised at all tbh
If I read a book where the female was like that I wouldn't finish it and be like YES I need a woman to kick the sheet out of me, treat me like dirt and control my every action, Some Women confuse me I'd look for the complete opposite in a person even if it's the money fetish with some girls no amount of money a girl had would I allow anyone treat me badly
This! And it's funny you mention 50 Shades of Grey because a lot of women went to look for their own Christian Grey, and successfully did, ended up in an abusive relationship.
I'm really at a loss at the moment... I'm just about ready to give up on love and even relationships of any sort altogether. There's practically nothing that can be said that will make me believe in love or genuine affection anymore.
In order to avoid issues here for people's true identities, I'm going to use fake names. Dan is the dude/boyfriend, and Lara is the girl/girlfriend. This is a long, long term couple Lara says they are in it for the long haul (forever.)
Lara is fat. Like, really fat. But she's still beautiful. She takes care of herself better than most people do. She is the most amazing girlfriend, she takes care of Dan's every wish and more. Dan works less than a full time job each week, he also works from home half of that time/hours. He is home more than Lara, and yet does absolutely no house chores. He hasn't taken out the garbage in 10 years, or never did after meeting Lara. So, Lara does everything, including go over finances and pay bills so Dan (who is manic depressive) doesn't stress over money. Instead, Lara stresses over money 24/7.
Dan, whom is well taken care of, well fed, and given all the emotional needs he requires from a Significant other, but he gives absolutely nothing in return. He only makes money to so Lara will pay bills. He emotionally and mentally abuses Lara, makes her hate herself, but Lara can't leave him because she would be living out on the streets. She's too old or not capable of getting a legit full time job or going to school to get a degree. So, her only choices are stay with Dan or move out and live with roommates for the rest of her life.
So, over the past few months, Dan has been being increasingly more brutal with his comments about her weight. He even gives her disgusted looks now. Lara has confided with friends, she has begun hating herself.
Lara persists that love still exists, but yet has dedicated herself to being with Dan for the rest of her life, no matter how horrible he gets to her. Or how shitty he treats her, and makes her believe she is worthless as a girlfriend.
Love, doesn't, fucking exist.
I don't ever need to try and find it myself, because if that's all we have to look forward too, I'd much rather die bitter and alone.
I'm so fucking done with trying. I believe it's time to shut down completely and purge every feeling I can feel, and let anger and fear fuel me to avoid ever feeling like Lara does about herself. I'm sincerely at a loss, I've no idea where to go from here.
I've never been this bitter and torn to completely give up on love, and emotions even. It's too hard to feel anymore, it all just hurts, it all just is so fleeting and conditional. Even the things that used to make me happy are no longer effective, and the other things have become stressful as hell.
I've held out for so long, held out thinking love existed, held out thinking life does get better, but it doesn't. Maybe for some of us, we're simply meant to live in misery and hate. Because that's reality.
I sincerely hope there are other people in this world who can live happy fulfilling lives with loved ones and romantic love. Just remember some of us are never going to be as lucky to have any sort of love, or hope for a better future.
Since you helped me out, I think it's only fair to return the favor.
While I have absolutely no experience in romantic relationships, I'll do the best I can. If he really treats Lara like that, maybe it's best to make some considerations about the relationship at hand. Dan simply needs to get off his butt and work just as hard as Lara. I mean if the two lives together, both should working on the same balance. Lara should continue finding recommendations from friends and also try to sit and talk to Dan about a few things.
I personally feel love does exist it just works in a way that you really can't control. It either works or it doesn't. Unfortunately it often ends up going down the drain quite often. Much like writing, you should never give up on what can possibly make yours (and potentially others's) lives better. Even though there were relationships with former friends that didn't work out, there's still others to look forward to. It took time and pain for me to find people that loved me back as much as I loved them. I just happened to be fortunate in meeting them. So try to keep looking forward, just let it be and eventually someone absolutely special that loves you back will just drop on your lap. Trust me, I've been alone for a long time in my many years and very miserable often, but I finally have some of the most wonderful people in my life.
As I always say "Life has its shitty moments but it certainly also has some of the most wonderful moments we can cherish." Whatever you're going through now will eventually pass for a more charitable time.
(Baymax hug)
(I'd stay on longer but it's nearly time to sleep. I'll check back later. Bye!)
I'm really at a loss at the moment... I'm just about ready to give up on love and even relationships of any sort altogether. There's practic… moreally nothing that can be said that will make me believe in love or genuine affection anymore.
In order to avoid issues here for people's true identities, I'm going to use fake names. Dan is the dude/boyfriend, and Lara is the girl/girlfriend. This is a long, long term couple Lara says they are in it for the long haul (forever.)
Lara is fat. Like, really fat. But she's still beautiful. She takes care of herself better than most people do. She is the most amazing girlfriend, she takes care of Dan's every wish and more. Dan works less than a full time job each week, he also works from home half of that time/hours. He is home more than Lara, and yet does absolutely no house chores. He hasn't taken out the garbage in 10 years, or never did after meeting Lara. So, Lara does everything, including go over f… [view original content]
Hillary Clinton and her supports annoy the hell outta me...
She said at the debate that she's not part of the establishment because she's… more a "woman running to be the first woman president"- that doesn't mean shit and she's just playing the woman card.
I also saw some lady at a Clinton rally on TV say that "there's a special place in hell for women who don't help fellow women" referring to women who won't vote for Hillary- what utter fucking bullshit. Feminism annoys me because most feminists I've seen take it too far and just because Hillary is a woman, doesn't mean that she should be President dumbasses.
And on a side note because I'm talking about the race, I watched the Republican Debate last night and I guess it was interesting
I just never understood Reylo. I'm a hardcore Finnrey shipper, and I thought Finn and Rey had WAY more chemistry than Rey and Kylo. I hate that the abusive ships (I like Rhack in a small moderation, when it's portrayed healthily) are some of the most popular, as well. Just kind of sucks, because it's kinda... kinda gross, honestly.
Hillary is 100% establishment. A career politician. I don't think there's anything explicitly wrong with that, but it's silly for her to frame herself as a grassroots insurgent like Bernie or Trump. Having a vagina doesn't automatically make you a maverick.
As for what her advisor said: it's completely bullshit, but it's not feminism as much as it is plain tribalism.
Hillary Clinton and her supports annoy the hell outta me...
She said at the debate that she's not part of the establishment because she's… more a "woman running to be the first woman president"- that doesn't mean shit and she's just playing the woman card.
I also saw some lady at a Clinton rally on TV say that "there's a special place in hell for women who don't help fellow women" referring to women who won't vote for Hillary- what utter fucking bullshit. Feminism annoys me because most feminists I've seen take it too far and just because Hillary is a woman, doesn't mean that she should be President dumbasses.
And on a side note because I'm talking about the race, I watched the Republican Debate last night and I guess it was interesting
Love isn't always easy. Half of all marriages end in divorce. In my immediate family, I am the only one who is still with a first spouse.
So that sounds like I'm agreeing with you, huh?
Lara's in a controlling relationship. Dan had figured out that he can do anything he wants, and Lara will still take care of him, because she has no choice. The next step will be for Dan to cheat on her. Then he'll want to move the woman he's cheating with in with them. Just how much will Lara tolerate?
Lara does have choices, but there's risk and planning involved with them. Making them could fix their relationship, or it could blow it apart. If she could make arrangements so that she would have the confidence that she could handle a blow-apart scenario, she could try some things that might make it better. Dan is working on getting rid of any confidence she has, though.
That's Lara's problem. Imagine if she had kids with this guy.
So what conclusion should you draw from this? You're leaning toward if Lara's miserable, then any relationship you might enter will also be miserable, so you should never look for one and reject anyone who tries.
Here's something I think is better. Don't be controlled. Earn your own income. Don't start a relationship unless you choose to be with a guy, not because you have to be. If he tries to make you feel bad because you're fat, tell him there's no sex until he apologizes and makes you feel appreciated again. If he says, well, if you won't give it to me, then I'll go out and get it somewhere else, tell him he'll have a fun time getting back in after you call the locksmith.
Gee, that sounds romantic, huh? It works. It will weed out anyone like Dan, which makes it easier to find someone who loves you for who you are. And there are guys like that out there. Don't let Dan ruin it for them.
I'm really at a loss at the moment... I'm just about ready to give up on love and even relationships of any sort altogether. There's practic… moreally nothing that can be said that will make me believe in love or genuine affection anymore.
In order to avoid issues here for people's true identities, I'm going to use fake names. Dan is the dude/boyfriend, and Lara is the girl/girlfriend. This is a long, long term couple Lara says they are in it for the long haul (forever.)
Lara is fat. Like, really fat. But she's still beautiful. She takes care of herself better than most people do. She is the most amazing girlfriend, she takes care of Dan's every wish and more. Dan works less than a full time job each week, he also works from home half of that time/hours. He is home more than Lara, and yet does absolutely no house chores. He hasn't taken out the garbage in 10 years, or never did after meeting Lara. So, Lara does everything, including go over f… [view original content]
I thought Finn and Rey had WAY more chemistry than Rey and Kylo.
If anything Rey and Kylo have no chemistry whatsoever, I don't see how people looked at that interrogation scene (which was coded as rape) and thought they would be a cute couple.
I hate that the abusive ships (I like Rhack in a small moderation, when it's portrayed healthily) are some of the most popular, as well. Just kind of sucks, because it's kinda... kinda gross, honestly.
Right? And it's also really annoying too because I see so many people try and say because it's "interesting" and it's not? Also a ship doesn't have to be abusive for it to be interesting, I don't know where it comes from.
I just never understood Reylo. I'm a hardcore Finnrey shipper, and I thought Finn and Rey had WAY more chemistry than Rey and Kylo. I hate t… morehat the abusive ships (I like Rhack in a small moderation, when it's portrayed healthily) are some of the most popular, as well. Just kind of sucks, because it's kinda... kinda gross, honestly.
Yup, I was surprised when she ACTUALLY said something really close to this to Bernie: "I'm a woman running to be the first woman president and you say I'm part of the establishment!?"- The woman card right there lol, she annoys the hell outta me.
I wasn't trying to say what her advisor said was feminism but I was trying to say that lots of Hillary supporters I've seen are Feminazis, and that I don't think I have actually met a feminist who doesn't take things way too far
Go Bernie though, I just want to see the guy take her out.
Eccch!
Hillary is 100% establishment. A career politician. I don't think there's anything explicitly wrong with that, but it's silly fo… morer her to frame herself as a grassroots insurgent like Bernie or Trump. Having a vagina doesn't automatically make you a maverick.
As for what her advisor said: it's completely bullshit, but it's not feminism as much as it is plain tribalism.
Hillary Clinton and her supports annoy the hell outta me...
She said at the debate that she's not part of the establishment because she's… more a "woman running to be the first woman president"- that doesn't mean shit and she's just playing the woman card.
I also saw some lady at a Clinton rally on TV say that "there's a special place in hell for women who don't help fellow women" referring to women who won't vote for Hillary- what utter fucking bullshit. Feminism annoys me because most feminists I've seen take it too far and just because Hillary is a woman, doesn't mean that she should be President dumbasses.
And on a side note because I'm talking about the race, I watched the Republican Debate last night and I guess it was interesting
Totalbiscuit lashed out against the chat today, soon after one of my comments saying something along the lines "Everyone in a team is targeting the tank" as their mistake. There were a few more advice like "back seat gaming" as TB sees them.
So I'm not sure if he lashed against me or someone else. But it really makes me reconsider if I should give him more money.
Started to monologue against a person he didn't name and it was so generic that you can't tell who blew him off today.
That guy should use some serious self reflection unless he wants to feed this vicious cycle even more.
Earlier that day he told in Twitch that he doesn't want people giving him money (didn't mean it like that but you can't help but make connection towards how grateful he really is.)
But yeah, I end up forgiving and liking him due he has poor mental health and community causing him constant stress which is not helping him to recover.
Thank you!
I thought Finn and Rey had WAY more chemistry than Rey and Kylo.
If anything Rey and Kylo have no chemistry whatsoe… morever, I don't see how people looked at that interrogation scene (which was coded as rape) and thought they would be a cute couple.
I hate that the abusive ships (I like Rhack in a small moderation, when it's portrayed healthily) are some of the most popular, as well. Just kind of sucks, because it's kinda... kinda gross, honestly.
Right? And it's also really annoying too because I see so many people try and say because it's "interesting" and it's not? Also a ship doesn't have to be abusive for it to be interesting, I don't know where it comes from.
So, recently there's been this guy who's friends with my girlfriend, I got a bad feeling about him like he's trying to get with her. Of course, these thoughts could be my anxiety, and I dropped it as that though I never could shake it. Well, eventually it got to the point to where the feeling was fucking with me, so I brought it up with her...Her response was less than reassuring. She said that he was trying to manipulate her through sweet talking and gifts, of course, like anyone, it pissed me off. I didn't want to aggressively confront him about this, because one, that's stupid and would solve nothing, two, he would see if as a challenge.
Instead of confronting him, I had intentions of telling people until I got an idea of how to come in contact with him to confront him non physically. Eventually one of my friends contacted his friend and they talked, the girl refused to give his number. She instead said that he denied that he was trying to manipulate her and, I don't know if this was the girl's speech or his, "If she didn't want it, wouldn't she say no?". First off, this is a god damned admittance to guilt if I've ever seen one and two it's blaming her. Of course, I told my girlfriend to just reject his advances next time. It made me mad, but I couldn't do anything.
Now, we jump to recently, she's still talking to him and I had a nightmare about it which filled me with anxiety all day. I fought with the anxiety between I trust her and there's something up. Eventually, I just needed to ask her "Do you really want his sweet talk?", of course, I thought she would just respond with no but her answer was...a lot more frightening. She responded with "I don't know"...and that just completely fucked me up. She went on about how she didn't know and eventually asked me a question which was do I trust her, of course, this done fucked me at this point. I didn't know if I trusted her or not, I said not completely though I really want to. She got hurt by this, and we argued about this.
She stopped talking to me for a while, that's when her friend started talking to me saying how much she cares about me, and how she used to have feelings for the guy last year and how I need to talk to the guy. Finally, I got his number to talk to him about this whole damned ordeal, he says he gives everyone gifts and he talks the whole "sweet talking" thing with everyone, which I fucking doubt but my friend said I need to try and trust him. I swear at one point he tried to get sympathy by telling me his friend tried to commit suicide recently.
I'm still uncertain, Apparently she was uncertain if she wanted the sweet talk because of her previous crush. It's still fucking with me.
I trust her, and it may just be a giant misunderstanding but I swear if anything comes from this again, I'll be more than pissed.
Man, My mind is all kinds of fucked up.
So, recently there's been this guy who's friends with my girlfriend, I got a bad feeling about hi… morem like he's trying to get with her. Of course, these thoughts could be my anxiety, and I dropped it as that though I never could shake it. Well, eventually it got to the point to where the feeling was fucking with me, so I brought it up with her...Her response was less than reassuring. She said that he was trying to manipulate her through sweet talking and gifts, of course, like anyone, it pissed me off. I didn't want to aggressively confront him about this, because one, that's stupid and would solve nothing, two, he would see if as a challenge.
Instead of confronting him, I had intentions of telling people until I got an idea of how to come in contact with him to confront him non physically. Eventually one of my friends contacted his friend and they talked, the girl refused to give his number. She ins… [view original content]
And Saltay's here (to make things better...or maybe worse...)
From how you put it, it sounds like your gf is kinda shy and probably not good at confronting people so she might not know what to say to him but it sucks that she's liked the guy before (he might see her as playing hard to get or something if she hasn't straight up said no.)
Being fair to the guy with the giving gifts to her, I personally give gifts to a lot of people (not Saltlicks thrown at people's heads you assuming Saltist shitbirds reading this..), even to friends that happen to be girls with boyfriends but if I can tell their boyfriend might be a little discomforted because I did that (especially when it's their birthdays and I get them a bag of presents they like and the guy just gets them a flower or something lol) I'll basically reassure them with stuff like "We're just good friends, she's more of a sister to me and if you mistreat her I'm gonna find you, you're a lucky guy, I'm taken right now, you have nothing to worry about, etc." so I usually avoid the whole awkward boyfriend paranoia thing but I've also been on the other side of that too where I'm wondering if some guy's trying to hit on my girlfriend but usually it's just me being paranoid.
With your situation, it does sound kinda sketchy but I wouldn't argue with her as you said you did, arguing with her might just make her want the guy even more so I guess try to be understanding and just go out with her or something don't be pissy to her and just try to change the mood. I know where you're coming from but it's probably something that won't turn into anything that big if she actually has liked you at all and wasn't just using you to make the other guy jealous or something... (worst case scenario, you can outspend the guy for her :PPP)
Man, My mind is all kinds of fucked up.
So, recently there's been this guy who's friends with my girlfriend, I got a bad feeling about hi… morem like he's trying to get with her. Of course, these thoughts could be my anxiety, and I dropped it as that though I never could shake it. Well, eventually it got to the point to where the feeling was fucking with me, so I brought it up with her...Her response was less than reassuring. She said that he was trying to manipulate her through sweet talking and gifts, of course, like anyone, it pissed me off. I didn't want to aggressively confront him about this, because one, that's stupid and would solve nothing, two, he would see if as a challenge.
Instead of confronting him, I had intentions of telling people until I got an idea of how to come in contact with him to confront him non physically. Eventually one of my friends contacted his friend and they talked, the girl refused to give his number. She ins… [view original content]
And Saltay's here (to make things better...or maybe worse...)
From how you put it, it sounds like your gf is kinda shy and probably not … moregood at confronting people so she might not know what to say to him but it sucks that she's liked the guy before (he might see her as playing hard to get or something if she hasn't straight up said no.)
Being fair to the guy with the giving gifts to her, I personally give gifts to a lot of people (not Saltlicks thrown at people's heads you assuming Saltist shitbirds reading this..), even to friends that happen to be girls with boyfriends but if I can tell their boyfriend might be a little discomforted because I did that (especially when it's their birthdays and I get them a bag of presents they like and the guy just gets them a flower or something lol) I'll basically reassure them with stuff like "We're just good friends, she's more of a sister to me and if you mistreat her I'm gonna find you, you're … [view original content]
Did something just happen that you didn't post? lol
Since you said "entire"-you're gonna be [Mod edit: rude] to her and constantly argue?... nice bro, nice... I don't know the exacts so I don't know how creepy or whatever the guy is but go ahead, if I'm "entirely" wrong, go be a dick to her, bros before hoes I guess if you wanna be that way...
[Mod edit: Let's please refrain from insulting users. Thanks.]
Okay, first of all, what the hell? You act like arguing isn't a healthy part of a relationship if done in moderation and done without getting too extreme. Second of all, what you edited out was what I was mainly saying no to.
Did something just happen that you didn't post? lol
Since you said "entire"-you're gonna be [Mod edit: rude] to her and constantly argue?… more... nice bro, nice... I don't know the exacts so I don't know how creepy or whatever the guy is but go ahead, if I'm "entirely" wrong, go be a dick to her, bros before hoes I guess if you wanna be that way...
[Mod edit: Let's please refrain from insulting users. Thanks.]
Alright, bro. May I say a brutal truth, and it is that this can end in quite a few ways. One, you break it off... Another, SHE breaks it off... Or, you guys get through this dilemma and work things out. Just remember, you'll be you in the end, no matter what happens. And sometimes in life, you gotta put your own sake ahead of others' sakes.
Man, My mind is all kinds of fucked up.
So, recently there's been this guy who's friends with my girlfriend, I got a bad feeling about hi… morem like he's trying to get with her. Of course, these thoughts could be my anxiety, and I dropped it as that though I never could shake it. Well, eventually it got to the point to where the feeling was fucking with me, so I brought it up with her...Her response was less than reassuring. She said that he was trying to manipulate her through sweet talking and gifts, of course, like anyone, it pissed me off. I didn't want to aggressively confront him about this, because one, that's stupid and would solve nothing, two, he would see if as a challenge.
Instead of confronting him, I had intentions of telling people until I got an idea of how to come in contact with him to confront him non physically. Eventually one of my friends contacted his friend and they talked, the girl refused to give his number. She ins… [view original content]
Okay, first of all, what the hell is with this response? I'm pretty sure you're emotional right now LOL.
You act like arguing isn't a healthy part of a relationship if done in moderation and done without getting too extreme. Second of all, what you edited out was what I was mainly saying no to.
My definition is that arguing is a pretty negative term- debating is a term that can be talking about differences but having arguments and making someone feel bad? Listen to yourself, maybe you're just venting since this is the VENT thread but it sounds like you're interrogating the girl who from how you've presented seems to be shy, it doesn't even sound like it's two sided- just you and the other guy with her caught in the middle.
Second of all, what you edited out was what I was mainly saying no to.
I didn't edit anything out lol, I may have fixed typos but I didn't edit anything out any points so please, tell me what was in there that made me trying to give advice "entirely wrong"
Okay, first of all, what the hell? You act like arguing isn't a healthy part of a relationship if done in moderation and done without getting too extreme. Second of all, what you edited out was what I was mainly saying no to.
Thanks for laughing at my emotional vulnerability right now, appreciate it.
Okay Salt, arguing in a relationship is good but in moderation. Just because you argue, it doesn't make the other person feel bad. Salt, the problem isn't me right now, it seems as if you're reading into the situation too much, you really don't know anything about the details and those are what matters. You see argument and you think bad, you think i'm "interrogating" her because i'm asking her simple questions about the situation, and you think she's caught in the middle? Salt, I don't think you understand that if she's in the middle, she's there because of the situation, no one forced her, it's a relationship. For example, if she thought a girl I was hanging out with was trying to manipulate me and the relationship and we talked about it, she didn't force me into what happens. I should add in that it wasn't much of an argument at all, but it was closer to that than "debate".
Plus, no offense but some of that advice isn't good. Out buy him? Hope that's a joke. Pretty sure you edited out the part about her leaving for him, if not then i must've been mistaken from the last sentence of her using us to make each other jealous.
Wanna add in real quick that telling me to keep being a dick and whatever that bros before hos comment was about, which let me add makes no sense in the situation, isn't exactly a good idea if you want me to act nice while explaining anything and everything to you.
Okay, first of all, what the hell?
Okay, first of all, what the hell is with this response? I'm pretty sure you're emotional right n… moreow LOL.
You act like arguing isn't a healthy part of a relationship if done in moderation and done without getting too extreme. Second of all, what you edited out was what I was mainly saying no to.
My definition is that arguing is a pretty negative term- debating is a term that can be talking about differences but having arguments and making someone feel bad? Listen to yourself, maybe you're just venting since this is the VENT thread but it sounds like you're interrogating the girl who from how you've presented seems to be shy, it doesn't even sound like it's two sided- just you and the other guy with her caught in the middle.
Second of all, what you edited out was what I was mainly saying no to.
I didn't edit anything out lol, I may have fixed typos but I didn't edit anything… [view original content]
It's heading towards the last of the three, it seems at the end as a lot of old feelings and misunderstandings, though it still makes me partially uncomfortable. Though i'm working on getting rid of it, after talking with our mutual friend i'm understanding that no matter her uncertainty about an old crush, her focus is undetered from me.
Alright, bro. May I say a brutal truth, and it is that this can end in quite a few ways. One, you break it off... Another, SHE breaks it off… more... Or, you guys get through this dilemma and work things out. Just remember, you'll be you in the end, no matter what happens. And sometimes in life, you gotta put your own sake ahead of others' sakes.
Thanks for laughing at my emotional vulnerability right now, appreciate it.
Well you were over-reacting to simple advice so yeah
Okay Salt, arguing in a relationship is good but in moderation. Just because you argue, it doesn't make the other person feel bad. Salt, the problem isn't me right now, it seems as if you're reading into the situation too much, you really don't know anything about the details and those are what matters. You see argument and you think bad, you think i'm "interrogating" her because i'm asking her simple questions about the situation, and you think she's caught in the middle? Salt, I don't think you understand that if she's in the middle, she's there because of the situation, no one forced her, it's a relationship. For example, if she thought a girl I was hanging out with was trying to manipulate me and the relationship and we talked about it, she didn't force me into what happens. I should add in that it wasn't much of an argument at all, but it was closer to that than "debate".
You're right I don't know the details but my point is "arguing", "debating"or whatever can be good if it's moderate but what you might call a "healthy argument" she might see as something else and something different.
Plus, no offense but some of that advice isn't good. Out buy him? Hope that's a joke. Pretty sure you edited out the part about her leaving for him, if not then i must've been mistaken from the last sentence of her using us to make each other jealous.
Well, the ":PPPP" was supposed to be a joke and nothing serious, thought that gave it away. And I didn't edit that out, you probably mistook the line.
Wanna add in real quick that telling me to keep being a dick and whatever that bros before hos comment was about, which let me add makes no sense in the situation, isn't exactly a good idea if you want me to act nice while explaining anything and everything to you.
I'm thinking of her, as I said you might think you're having healthy arguments but she might see it as you being a dick to her, I just don't want to see you say later "SHE LEFT ME BOOHOO I WAS TOO HARD ON HER" and stuff. So sorry if I came off as a dick but dating should be fun, not something you panic and have breakdowns or something over.
Thanks for laughing at my emotional vulnerability right now, appreciate it.
Okay Salt, arguing in a relationship is good but in moderatio… moren. Just because you argue, it doesn't make the other person feel bad. Salt, the problem isn't me right now, it seems as if you're reading into the situation too much, you really don't know anything about the details and those are what matters. You see argument and you think bad, you think i'm "interrogating" her because i'm asking her simple questions about the situation, and you think she's caught in the middle? Salt, I don't think you understand that if she's in the middle, she's there because of the situation, no one forced her, it's a relationship. For example, if she thought a girl I was hanging out with was trying to manipulate me and the relationship and we talked about it, she didn't force me into what happens. I should add in that it wasn't much of an argument at all, but it was closer to that th… [view original content]
"Over reaction" is a broad term, which part was over reacting? Disagreeing with a part of your advice or saying what the hell for saying I should keep acting like a dick? Nothing here seems like an over reaction at all, plus, you don't hear my voice so it can be easy to take a simple what the hell as offended thing.
The thing about it, is that she saw it the same way, so...whatever. It's healthy, and its not healthy when it's not necessary of moderate.
First off, the situation turned against me here where I was looking for advice about the situation and I'm told him a dick for talking to her about it. Dating is something else entirely, it isn't always fun, and that's the truth. The amount of support you get on this is frightening to the idea of dating.
So how bout we drop this, it's just getting stupid at this point.
Thanks for laughing at my emotional vulnerability right now, appreciate it.
Well you were over-reacting to simple advice so yeah
… more Okay Salt, arguing in a relationship is good but in moderation. Just because you argue, it doesn't make the other person feel bad. Salt, the problem isn't me right now, it seems as if you're reading into the situation too much, you really don't know anything about the details and those are what matters. You see argument and you think bad, you think i'm "interrogating" her because i'm asking her simple questions about the situation, and you think she's caught in the middle? Salt, I don't think you understand that if she's in the middle, she's there because of the situation, no one forced her, it's a relationship. For example, if she thought a girl I was hanging out with was trying to manipulate me and the relationship and we talked about it, she didn't force me into what happens. I should add in that it… [view original content]
"Over reaction" is a broad term, which part was over reacting? Disagreeing with a part of your advice or saying what the hell for saying I s… morehould keep acting like a dick? Nothing here seems like an over reaction at all, plus, you don't hear my voice so it can be easy to take a simple what the hell as offended thing.
The thing about it, is that she saw it the same way, so...whatever. It's healthy, and its not healthy when it's not necessary of moderate.
First off, the situation turned against me here where I was looking for advice about the situation and I'm told him a dick for talking to her about it. Dating is something else entirely, it isn't always fun, and that's the truth. The amount of support you get on this is frightening to the idea of dating.
So how bout we drop this, it's just getting stupid at this point.
Comments
Sorry about my earlier vent. Jealousy got the best of me since I worked pretty hard on a story. After reading my friend's fanfic for a bit I feel a little better knowing they're doing well in their's and besides the fact it's pretty darn good.
So I went to re-watch Star Wars with my dad, and this has been eating me up for a long time so I need to vent about this.
Why would anyone ship Reylo???
I can understand if the people who are shipping it are abuse survivors using the ship for Coping Mechanism, but what's concerning is that most of them aren't and are romanticizing abuse. Let alone I've seen one of them go as low into racism by referring to Finn as "cole boy" because their scared of Finnrey (a.k.a an interracial representation, where it showed chemistry from those two characters since they met and most likely going to happen anyway) becoming canon and shitting on people who are triggered by the topic of abuse, like myself.
Also overall in the film Kylo threatens Rey, gets into a fight with Rey, kills Han Solo, a.k.a Rey's father figure and his dad, also there is a possibility Rey being Kylo's cousin since it's more than likely that she's Luke's daughter. It baffles me that people want Rey to be used for Kylo's redemption when -if he ever does get a redemption- it's more possible going to be Leia, his mother who wants him to return to the light.
It's just like Rhack all over again where the abusive ship is the most popular ship in the fandom and it's really bugging me.
I took the interrogation as a rape threat until I realized he did his weird mindreading. It's, well, interesting. I can't understand why it exists, but the world is a strange place.
I did find that ship to be odd. They are enemies so to be in a romantic relationship together makes me scratch my head.
Plus I don't want incest, Leia unknowingly kissing her brother is bad enough for me. .-.
Read this instantly taught tumblr so I searched the term reylo top results tumblr
There is you're answer never try to use logic against tumblr you will only get you're head messed up
Look at fifty shades of grey one of the best selling romance novels ever for women written by a woman inspired by her fantasy's the book is all about an abusive and dominating lead male
Joker and Harley Quinn no one bates an eyelid that's all abuse no one ever questions it XD
I'm not surprised at all tbh
If I am correct that scene was confirmed to be coded as a rape scene, if I ever find the link I'll post it here.
Edit: Yep, found it
Imagine if Tumblr was a thing back then, imagine the nightmare.
This! And it's funny you mention 50 Shades of Grey because a lot of women went to look for their own Christian Grey, and successfully did, ended up in an abusive relationship.
Searched for a person like an abusive person and found it this stupidity I'm speechless
WHY THE F**K WOULD U WANT A PERSON like Christian Grey
enter link description here
If I read a book where the female was like that I wouldn't finish it and be like YES I need a woman to kick the sheet out of me, treat me like dirt and control my every action, Some Women confuse me I'd look for the complete opposite in a person even if it's the money fetish with some girls no amount of money a girl had would I allow anyone treat me badly
I'm really at a loss at the moment... I'm just about ready to give up on love and even relationships of any sort altogether. There's practically nothing that can be said that will make me believe in love or genuine affection anymore.
In order to avoid issues here for people's true identities, I'm going to use fake names. Dan is the dude/boyfriend, and Lara is the girl/girlfriend. This is a long, long term couple Lara says they are in it for the long haul (forever.)
Lara is fat. Like, really fat. But she's still beautiful. She takes care of herself better than most people do. She is the most amazing girlfriend, she takes care of Dan's every wish and more. Dan works less than a full time job each week, he also works from home half of that time/hours. He is home more than Lara, and yet does absolutely no house chores. He hasn't taken out the garbage in 10 years, or never did after meeting Lara. So, Lara does everything, including go over finances and pay bills so Dan (who is manic depressive) doesn't stress over money. Instead, Lara stresses over money 24/7.
Dan, whom is well taken care of, well fed, and given all the emotional needs he requires from a Significant other, but he gives absolutely nothing in return. He only makes money to so Lara will pay bills. He emotionally and mentally abuses Lara, makes her hate herself, but Lara can't leave him because she would be living out on the streets. She's too old or not capable of getting a legit full time job or going to school to get a degree. So, her only choices are stay with Dan or move out and live with roommates for the rest of her life.
So, over the past few months, Dan has been being increasingly more brutal with his comments about her weight. He even gives her disgusted looks now. Lara has confided with friends, she has begun hating herself.
Lara persists that love still exists, but yet has dedicated herself to being with Dan for the rest of her life, no matter how horrible he gets to her. Or how shitty he treats her, and makes her believe she is worthless as a girlfriend.
Love, doesn't, fucking exist.
I don't ever need to try and find it myself, because if that's all we have to look forward too, I'd much rather die bitter and alone.
I'm so fucking done with trying. I believe it's time to shut down completely and purge every feeling I can feel, and let anger and fear fuel me to avoid ever feeling like Lara does about herself. I'm sincerely at a loss, I've no idea where to go from here.
I've never been this bitter and torn to completely give up on love, and emotions even. It's too hard to feel anymore, it all just hurts, it all just is so fleeting and conditional. Even the things that used to make me happy are no longer effective, and the other things have become stressful as hell.
I've held out for so long, held out thinking love existed, held out thinking life does get better, but it doesn't. Maybe for some of us, we're simply meant to live in misery and hate. Because that's reality.
I sincerely hope there are other people in this world who can live happy fulfilling lives with loved ones and romantic love. Just remember some of us are never going to be as lucky to have any sort of love, or hope for a better future.
Since you helped me out, I think it's only fair to return the favor.
While I have absolutely no experience in romantic relationships, I'll do the best I can. If he really treats Lara like that, maybe it's best to make some considerations about the relationship at hand. Dan simply needs to get off his butt and work just as hard as Lara. I mean if the two lives together, both should working on the same balance. Lara should continue finding recommendations from friends and also try to sit and talk to Dan about a few things.
I personally feel love does exist it just works in a way that you really can't control. It either works or it doesn't. Unfortunately it often ends up going down the drain quite often. Much like writing, you should never give up on what can possibly make yours (and potentially others's) lives better. Even though there were relationships with former friends that didn't work out, there's still others to look forward to. It took time and pain for me to find people that loved me back as much as I loved them. I just happened to be fortunate in meeting them. So try to keep looking forward, just let it be and eventually someone absolutely special that loves you back will just drop on your lap. Trust me, I've been alone for a long time in my many years and very miserable often, but I finally have some of the most wonderful people in my life.
As I always say "Life has its shitty moments but it certainly also has some of the most wonderful moments we can cherish." Whatever you're going through now will eventually pass for a more charitable time.
(Baymax hug)
(I'd stay on longer but it's nearly time to sleep. I'll check back later. Bye!)
This is the first that I have caught a cold in Summer, and it is lingering around longer than I am used to or could tolerate.
Amen, brother. You literally just summed up all of my thoughts on Clinton.
I just never understood Reylo. I'm a hardcore Finnrey shipper, and I thought Finn and Rey had WAY more chemistry than Rey and Kylo. I hate that the abusive ships (I like Rhack in a small moderation, when it's portrayed healthily) are some of the most popular, as well. Just kind of sucks, because it's kinda... kinda gross, honestly.
It's winter over here still and I get colds or a stuffy nose more or less every month.
Eccch!
Hillary is 100% establishment. A career politician. I don't think there's anything explicitly wrong with that, but it's silly for her to frame herself as a grassroots insurgent like Bernie or Trump. Having a vagina doesn't automatically make you a maverick.
As for what her advisor said: it's completely bullshit, but it's not feminism as much as it is plain tribalism.
Love isn't always easy. Half of all marriages end in divorce. In my immediate family, I am the only one who is still with a first spouse.
So that sounds like I'm agreeing with you, huh?
Lara's in a controlling relationship. Dan had figured out that he can do anything he wants, and Lara will still take care of him, because she has no choice. The next step will be for Dan to cheat on her. Then he'll want to move the woman he's cheating with in with them. Just how much will Lara tolerate?
Lara does have choices, but there's risk and planning involved with them. Making them could fix their relationship, or it could blow it apart. If she could make arrangements so that she would have the confidence that she could handle a blow-apart scenario, she could try some things that might make it better. Dan is working on getting rid of any confidence she has, though.
That's Lara's problem. Imagine if she had kids with this guy.
So what conclusion should you draw from this? You're leaning toward if Lara's miserable, then any relationship you might enter will also be miserable, so you should never look for one and reject anyone who tries.
Here's something I think is better. Don't be controlled. Earn your own income. Don't start a relationship unless you choose to be with a guy, not because you have to be. If he tries to make you feel bad because you're fat, tell him there's no sex until he apologizes and makes you feel appreciated again. If he says, well, if you won't give it to me, then I'll go out and get it somewhere else, tell him he'll have a fun time getting back in after you call the locksmith.
Gee, that sounds romantic, huh? It works. It will weed out anyone like Dan, which makes it easier to find someone who loves you for who you are. And there are guys like that out there. Don't let Dan ruin it for them.
Or stay single forever. If it makes you happy.
Thank you!
If anything Rey and Kylo have no chemistry whatsoever, I don't see how people looked at that interrogation scene (which was coded as rape) and thought they would be a cute couple.
Right? And it's also really annoying too because I see so many people try and say because it's "interesting" and it's not? Also a ship doesn't have to be abusive for it to be interesting, I don't know where it comes from.
Yup, I was surprised when she ACTUALLY said something really close to this to Bernie: "I'm a woman running to be the first woman president and you say I'm part of the establishment!?"- The woman card right there lol, she annoys the hell outta me.
I wasn't trying to say what her advisor said was feminism but I was trying to say that lots of Hillary supporters I've seen are Feminazis, and that I don't think I have actually met a feminist who doesn't take things way too far
Go Bernie though, I just want to see the guy take her out.
People ship Kylo Ren and Rey???
Ohhh, I thought this was going to be about ventriloquism. Nevermind what I was going to post
Ugh, not the "I'm a woman give me sympathy" card.
Totalbiscuit lashed out against the chat today, soon after one of my comments saying something along the lines "Everyone in a team is targeting the tank" as their mistake. There were a few more advice like "back seat gaming" as TB sees them.
So I'm not sure if he lashed against me or someone else. But it really makes me reconsider if I should give him more money.
Started to monologue against a person he didn't name and it was so generic that you can't tell who blew him off today.
That guy should use some serious self reflection unless he wants to feed this vicious cycle even more.
Earlier that day he told in Twitch that he doesn't want people giving him money (didn't mean it like that but you can't help but make connection towards how grateful he really is.)
But yeah, I end up forgiving and liking him due he has poor mental health and community causing him constant stress which is not helping him to recover.
Jesus Christ! INTERESTING? They find an abusive relationship interesting? Is this on Tumblr or something? That's sick. What's wrong with people?
Man, My mind is all kinds of fucked up.
So, recently there's been this guy who's friends with my girlfriend, I got a bad feeling about him like he's trying to get with her. Of course, these thoughts could be my anxiety, and I dropped it as that though I never could shake it. Well, eventually it got to the point to where the feeling was fucking with me, so I brought it up with her...Her response was less than reassuring. She said that he was trying to manipulate her through sweet talking and gifts, of course, like anyone, it pissed me off. I didn't want to aggressively confront him about this, because one, that's stupid and would solve nothing, two, he would see if as a challenge.
Instead of confronting him, I had intentions of telling people until I got an idea of how to come in contact with him to confront him non physically. Eventually one of my friends contacted his friend and they talked, the girl refused to give his number. She instead said that he denied that he was trying to manipulate her and, I don't know if this was the girl's speech or his, "If she didn't want it, wouldn't she say no?". First off, this is a god damned admittance to guilt if I've ever seen one and two it's blaming her. Of course, I told my girlfriend to just reject his advances next time. It made me mad, but I couldn't do anything.
Now, we jump to recently, she's still talking to him and I had a nightmare about it which filled me with anxiety all day. I fought with the anxiety between I trust her and there's something up. Eventually, I just needed to ask her "Do you really want his sweet talk?", of course, I thought she would just respond with no but her answer was...a lot more frightening. She responded with "I don't know"...and that just completely fucked me up. She went on about how she didn't know and eventually asked me a question which was do I trust her, of course, this done fucked me at this point. I didn't know if I trusted her or not, I said not completely though I really want to. She got hurt by this, and we argued about this.
She stopped talking to me for a while, that's when her friend started talking to me saying how much she cares about me, and how she used to have feelings for the guy last year and how I need to talk to the guy. Finally, I got his number to talk to him about this whole damned ordeal, he says he gives everyone gifts and he talks the whole "sweet talking" thing with everyone, which I fucking doubt but my friend said I need to try and trust him. I swear at one point he tried to get sympathy by telling me his friend tried to commit suicide recently.
I'm still uncertain, Apparently she was uncertain if she wanted the sweet talk because of her previous crush. It's still fucking with me.
I trust her, and it may just be a giant misunderstanding but I swear if anything comes from this again, I'll be more than pissed.
I'm sorry Golden.
Being in a relationship is not easy. There will be its ups and downs. Hope that the problem will diffuse soon.
Me too...It's definitely not fun.
And Saltay's here (to make things better...or maybe worse...)
From how you put it, it sounds like your gf is kinda shy and probably not good at confronting people so she might not know what to say to him but it sucks that she's liked the guy before (he might see her as playing hard to get or something if she hasn't straight up said no.)
Being fair to the guy with the giving gifts to her, I personally give gifts to a lot of people (not Saltlicks thrown at people's heads you assuming Saltist shitbirds reading this..), even to friends that happen to be girls with boyfriends but if I can tell their boyfriend might be a little discomforted because I did that (especially when it's their birthdays and I get them a bag of presents they like and the guy just gets them a flower or something lol) I'll basically reassure them with stuff like "We're just good friends, she's more of a sister to me and if you mistreat her I'm gonna find you, you're a lucky guy, I'm taken right now, you have nothing to worry about, etc." so I usually avoid the whole awkward boyfriend paranoia thing but I've also been on the other side of that too where I'm wondering if some guy's trying to hit on my girlfriend but usually it's just me being paranoid.
With your situation, it does sound kinda sketchy but I wouldn't argue with her as you said you did, arguing with her might just make her want the guy even more so I guess try to be understanding and just go out with her or something don't be pissy to her and just try to change the mood. I know where you're coming from but it's probably something that won't turn into anything that big if she actually has liked you at all and wasn't just using you to make the other guy jealous or something... (worst case scenario, you can outspend the guy for her :PPP)
Good Luck Though.
That entire last paragraph I can easily label as a big no.
Did something just happen that you didn't post? lol
Since you said "entire"-you're gonna be [Mod edit: rude] to her and constantly argue?... nice bro, nice... I don't know the exacts so I don't know how creepy or whatever the guy is but go ahead, if I'm "entirely" wrong, go be a dick to her, bros before hoes I guess if you wanna be that way...
[Mod edit: Let's please refrain from insulting users. Thanks.]
Okay, first of all, what the hell? You act like arguing isn't a healthy part of a relationship if done in moderation and done without getting too extreme. Second of all, what you edited out was what I was mainly saying no to.
Alright, bro. May I say a brutal truth, and it is that this can end in quite a few ways. One, you break it off... Another, SHE breaks it off... Or, you guys get through this dilemma and work things out. Just remember, you'll be you in the end, no matter what happens. And sometimes in life, you gotta put your own sake ahead of others' sakes.
Okay, first of all, what the hell is with this response? I'm pretty sure you're emotional right now LOL.
My definition is that arguing is a pretty negative term- debating is a term that can be talking about differences but having arguments and making someone feel bad? Listen to yourself, maybe you're just venting since this is the VENT thread but it sounds like you're interrogating the girl who from how you've presented seems to be shy, it doesn't even sound like it's two sided- just you and the other guy with her caught in the middle.
I didn't edit anything out lol, I may have fixed typos but I didn't edit anything out any points so please, tell me what was in there that made me trying to give advice "entirely wrong"
Thanks for laughing at my emotional vulnerability right now, appreciate it.
Okay Salt, arguing in a relationship is good but in moderation. Just because you argue, it doesn't make the other person feel bad. Salt, the problem isn't me right now, it seems as if you're reading into the situation too much, you really don't know anything about the details and those are what matters. You see argument and you think bad, you think i'm "interrogating" her because i'm asking her simple questions about the situation, and you think she's caught in the middle? Salt, I don't think you understand that if she's in the middle, she's there because of the situation, no one forced her, it's a relationship. For example, if she thought a girl I was hanging out with was trying to manipulate me and the relationship and we talked about it, she didn't force me into what happens. I should add in that it wasn't much of an argument at all, but it was closer to that than "debate".
Plus, no offense but some of that advice isn't good. Out buy him? Hope that's a joke. Pretty sure you edited out the part about her leaving for him, if not then i must've been mistaken from the last sentence of her using us to make each other jealous.
Wanna add in real quick that telling me to keep being a dick and whatever that bros before hos comment was about, which let me add makes no sense in the situation, isn't exactly a good idea if you want me to act nice while explaining anything and everything to you.
It's heading towards the last of the three, it seems at the end as a lot of old feelings and misunderstandings, though it still makes me partially uncomfortable. Though i'm working on getting rid of it, after talking with our mutual friend i'm understanding that no matter her uncertainty about an old crush, her focus is undetered from me.
Well you were over-reacting to simple advice so yeah
You're right I don't know the details but my point is "arguing", "debating"or whatever can be good if it's moderate but what you might call a "healthy argument" she might see as something else and something different.
Well, the ":PPPP" was supposed to be a joke and nothing serious, thought that gave it away. And I didn't edit that out, you probably mistook the line.
I'm thinking of her, as I said you might think you're having healthy arguments but she might see it as you being a dick to her, I just don't want to see you say later "SHE LEFT ME BOOHOO I WAS TOO HARD ON HER" and stuff. So sorry if I came off as a dick but dating should be fun, not something you panic and have breakdowns or something over.
"Over reaction" is a broad term, which part was over reacting? Disagreeing with a part of your advice or saying what the hell for saying I should keep acting like a dick? Nothing here seems like an over reaction at all, plus, you don't hear my voice so it can be easy to take a simple what the hell as offended thing.
The thing about it, is that she saw it the same way, so...whatever. It's healthy, and its not healthy when it's not necessary of moderate.
First off, the situation turned against me here where I was looking for advice about the situation and I'm told him a dick for talking to her about it. Dating is something else entirely, it isn't always fun, and that's the truth. The amount of support you get on this is frightening to the idea of dating.
So how bout we drop this, it's just getting stupid at this point.
That sounds like a good idea for you guys, indeed. Let's do that.