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Telltale, you've really screwed us over this time!

Secret FawfulSecret Fawful
edited June 2010 in Jurassic Park
How dare you take two great adventure series and turn them into two great adventure games! What the HELL is the matter with you, damn it! How dare you! I mean what were you thinking!? Are you insane! How could you do this to us, Telltale!? It's all ruined now. Your image, your ability to tell stories and make great games! I'm so mad over this great deal you've made with Universal I could very well PEE MY PANTS! Is that what you want? For me to pee my pants? Is that what this is all about Telltale, proving your superiority in bladder control? Oh well GOOD FOR YOU. I hope you're happy. Oh, and I don't like Yare anymore either, the bastard. I hope Dave Grossman's hair starts to uncurl and turn stark white. I've lost all faith in you. I'll never not buy another thing from you again.

And your feet smell.

And you All Hail Lord Xenu, you scientologist loving bastards.

And you make puppies cry.

And you use forced child labor to make your DVDs.

And you took my girlfriend away in high school.

And you beat my mother. YOU BEAT MY MOTHER YOU BASTARDS.

YOU BURNED MY HOUSE DOWN. DAMN YOU. DAMN YOU ALL TO HARDEES.

GET YOUR STINKIN CLICK AND DRAG OFF OF ME YOU DAMN DIRTY APES! ITS A MADHOUSE! A MAAAAAADHOOOOOOOUUUSEEE! TELLTALE IS PEOPLE! TELLTALE, LET MY PEOPLE GO!

Comments

  • IcedhopeIcedhope
    edited June 2010
    Secret Fawful wrote: »
    How dare you take two great adventure series and turn them into two great adventure games! What the HELL is the matter with you, damn it! How dare you! I mean what were you thinking!? Are you insane! How could you do this to us, Telltale!? It's all ruined now. Your image, your ability to tell stories and make great games! I'm so mad over this great deal you've made with Universal I could very well PEE MY PANTS! Is that what you want? For me to pee my pants? Is that what this is all about Telltale, proving your superiority in bladder control? Oh well GOOD FOR YOU. I hope you're happy. Oh, and I don't like Yare anymore either, the bastard. I hope Dave Grossman's hair starts to uncurl and turn stark white. I've lost all faith in you. I'll never not buy another thing from you again.

    And your feet smell.

    And you All Hail Lord Xenu, you scientologist loving bastards.

    And you make puppies cry.

    And you use forced child labor to make your DVDs.

    And you took my girlfriend away in high school.

    And you beat my mother. YOU BEAT MY MOTHER YOU BASTARDS.

    YOU BURNED MY HOUSE DOWN. DAMN YOU. DAMN YOU ALL TO HARDEES.

    Your sarcasm makes me happy, and smile.
  • GuruGuru214GuruGuru214
    edited June 2010
    Fawful, you've really done it this time. How dare you write a ridiculous satire of people's concerns! What the HELL is the matter with you, damn it! How dare you! I mean what were you thinking!? Are you insane! How could you do this to us, Fawful!? It's all ruined now. Your image, your ability to make decent forum posts and be taken seriously! I'm so mad over this awful thing you've written I could very well KICK MY DOG! Is that what you want? For me to kick my dog? Is that what this is all about Fawful, proving your superiority in leg control? Oh well GOOD FOR YOU. I hope you're happy. Oh, and I don't like your cat anymore either, the bastard. I hope Amadeus's wig starts to uncurl and turn not stark white. I've lost all faith in you. I'll never not make fun of you again.

    And your name is stupid.

    And you All Hail Claude Frollo, you hunchback hating bastard.

    And you make children cry.

    And you use forced child labor to make your posts.

    And you took my lunch money in first grade.

    And you beat my high score. YOU BEAT MY HIGH SCORE YOU BASTARD.

    YOU BLEW UP MY CAR. DAMN YOU. DAMN YOU TO SNUCKEYS.
  • FalancaFalanca
    edited June 2010
    Telltale has just raped my childhood.
  • Secret FawfulSecret Fawful
    edited June 2010
    GuruGuru214 wrote: »
    Fawful, you've really done it this time. How dare you write a ridiculous satire of people's concerns! What the HELL is the matter with you, damn it! How dare you! I mean what were you thinking!? Are you insane! How could you do this to us, Fawful!? It's all ruined now. Your image, your ability to make decent forum posts and be taken seriously! I'm so mad over this awful thing you've written I could very well KICK MY DOG! Is that what you want? For me to kick my dog? Is that what this is all about Fawful, proving your superiority in leg control? Oh well GOOD FOR YOU. I hope you're happy. Oh, and I don't like your cat anymore either, the bastard. I hope Amadeus's wig starts to uncurl and turn not stark white. I've lost all faith in you. I'll never not make fun of you again.

    And your name is stupid.

    And you All Hail Claude Frollo, you hunchback hating bastard.

    And you make children cry.

    And you use forced child labor to make your posts.

    And you took my lunch money in first grade.

    And you beat my high score. YOU BEAT MY HIGH SCORE YOU BASTARD.

    YOU BLEW UP MY CAR. DAMN YOU. DAMN YOU TO SNUCKEYS.

    Epic Win Response.
  • GuruGuru214GuruGuru214
    edited June 2010
    Falanca wrote: »
    Telltale has just raped my childhood.

    Funny, I think my childhood has just raped Telltale.
  • thatdude98thatdude98
    edited June 2010
    GuruGuru214 wrote: »
    Funny, I think my childhood has just raped Telltale.

    Made of WIN.
  • IrishmileIrishmile
    edited June 2010
    I would not assume they will be adventure games....
  • FalancaFalanca
    edited June 2010
    They'll be educational puzzle games, I tell you.
  • thatdude98thatdude98
    edited June 2010
    Telltale has asked me to do terrible things in my sleep. TERRIBLE. :eek:

    They...

    told me...

    to...

    NO! IT'S TOO MUCH! I WON'T SAY IT! NO!

    But YES! I must go on! for the good of humanity!

    They... told... me... to...

    BUY ALL THEIR GAMES!

    AHHHHH! There! I said it! I'm going to go cry now, in the shoulder of a paid psychologist! I'll never look at my credit cards the same way again! CURSE YOU MASTER CARD! CURSE YOU VISA! WHY?!! WHY MUST YOU MAKE ME SPEND AND SPEND AND SPEND?!! DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU ALL TO HEELLLLLLLLL!
  • Secret FawfulSecret Fawful
    edited June 2010
    I'm suddenly reminded of this old topic.
  • GuruGuru214GuruGuru214
    edited June 2010
    Secret Fawful wrote: »
    I'm suddenly reminded of this old topic.

    Uhh...what?
  • Secret FawfulSecret Fawful
    edited June 2010
    Monkey Island being shopped into various FPS's.
  • GuruGuru214GuruGuru214
    edited June 2010
    Oh. Gotcha.
  • FalancaFalanca
    edited June 2010
    Things got unfunny after a while and, things got awkward afterwards and all :/
  • thatdude98thatdude98
    edited June 2010
    Your mom got awkward afterwards

    OH!
  • MusicallyInspiredMusicallyInspired
    edited June 2010
    This is now officially the quick-wit comeback thread.
  • GuruGuru214GuruGuru214
    edited June 2010
    So's your face!









    ...what? They can't all be winners.
  • Secret FawfulSecret Fawful
    edited June 2010
    Now now. Let's be mature about this. Mister Poopypants.
  • GuruGuru214GuruGuru214
    edited June 2010
    Screw maturity, you big ol' bed wetting doody head!
  • Secret FawfulSecret Fawful
    edited June 2010
    funny-pictures-cat-makes-a-raspberry-at-you1.jpg
  • GuruGuru214GuruGuru214
    edited June 2010
    Oh jeez, we've already escalated to lolcats?
  • The HighwayThe Highway
    edited June 2010
    Irishmile wrote: »
    I would not assume they will be adventure games....

    if they aren't adventure games i'm not going to buy them:mad:
  • HaydenHayden
    edited June 2010
    Seeing as how we're all being immature, you just lost the game!

    By the way, on a serious note, here's the new trailer for the Jurassic Park game. It seems to be purely adventure.
  • TorTor
    edited June 2010
    Hayden wrote: »
    By the way, on a serious note, here's the new trailer for the Jurassic Park game. It seems to be purely adventure.
    Looks promising. I'm sure it isn't gonna let me down...
  • Secret FawfulSecret Fawful
    edited June 2010
    Hayden wrote: »
    Seeing as how we're all being immature, you just lost the game!

    By the way, on a serious note, here's the new trailer for the Jurassic Park game. It seems to be purely adventure.

    Yes, I see. It looks fantastic. Marvelous even. Blow me.

    Hey, look at this! A trailer for Back to the Future too!
  • Lena_PLena_P
    edited June 2010
    Yeah, but I feel TTG better captured that early/mid-80's feel in this Back to the Future trailer.
  • GuruGuru214GuruGuru214
    edited June 2010
    I'm not gonna lie. It's Caramelldansen.
  • Secret FawfulSecret Fawful
    edited June 2010
    I prefer this HD quality version of the trailer that was put up on Youtube. All in all it really gives me hope that Telltale know how to adapt a good story. I really liked the Arthur Fonzarelli cameo.
  • Lena_PLena_P
    edited June 2010
    GuruGuru214 wrote: »
    I'm not gonna lie. It's Caramelldansen.

    Sadly, I found that adorable. I know, but I was addicted to Sanrio in my youth! I have zero immunity to cute Japanese things!
    Secret Fawful wrote: »
    I prefer this HD quality version of the trailer that was put up on Youtube. All in all it really gives me hope that Telltale know how to adapt a good story. I really liked the Arthur Fonzarelli cameo.

    I preferred the original version with the uncut, infamous monkey wrench scene.
  • sintarsissintarsis
    edited June 2010
    give them a chance let them come out with a game and if it sucks then hey thanks for ruining my favorite series reputation if it works then sweet
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