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Best lines from anything ever

mysterybowlermysterybowler
edited July 2010 in General Chat
As I wait for Puzzle Agent and keep checking back here for news, I though I would start a thread as I'm fairly new to posting here.

So, best lines from anything ever...

Please post your favourite lines from your favourite TV shows, Movies, Games etc.

I'll start

Star Trek, Original series - City on the edge of forever

Spock - 'Edith Keeler must die'

I always though that would make a great name for a band.
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Comments

  • coolsomecoolsome
    edited June 2010
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MIt0VY7Yg2w
  • ShwooShwoo
    edited June 2010
    I like this exchange from Homestar Runner:

    (Homestar's girlfriend Marzipan is on a date with Strong Bad's lackey/best friend/pet The Cheat)
    Homestar: Oh man. Seriously, Strong Strong, we've gotta do something about this.
    Strong Bad: Ordinarily I just drown my problems in video games. But for this I maybe I should drown them in... drowning... them. (smiles)
    Homestar: Uh, maybe let's not kill anybody. We should just try and ruin their date.
    Strong Bad: Explain to me how drowning them wouldn't ruin their date.


    This exchange from Phineas and Ferb is good too:

    (Doofenshmirtz and his brother Roger have arranged to play golf)
    Roger: Hello, brother dear, sorry we're late, couldn't be helped. You know how it is. Traffic was terrible, and I've already wasted half the morning not caring at all about being punctual for our golf game. [...] Oh, lighten up, Heinz. You know what they say. You can't be teed off once you've teed off. (chuckles) That was very funny.
    Doofenshmirtz: What? Who says that?
    Roger: You know. They. Those guys over there.
    (He points at two creepy twins standing nearby)
    Twins: (in a monotone) You can't be teed off once you've teed off.
    Roger: Creepy, huh? I've been trying to ditch those guys all day.
  • IrishmileIrishmile
    edited June 2010
    Roy Batty's death scene is full of win....
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTzA_xesrL8
  • mysterybowlermysterybowler
    edited June 2010
    Irishmile wrote: »
    Roy Batty's death scene is full of win....
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTzA_xesrL8

    I haven't watched Bladerunner in an age. I think I only have it on VHS though.

    Anyway, here's one of my favs

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KS2khYJZKwA
  • NimeniNimeni
    edited June 2010
    This still makes me giggle like a love-struck school girl.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RB2GboGOuTI
  • The HighwayThe Highway
    edited June 2010
    This entire ad is full of great lines!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vAfXNzXueE

    My favorite bits are:

    "Tomahawk Chop!"

    and

    "If you don't like our prices, I'll punch a puppy and kick a kitten just for you!"
  • IrishmileIrishmile
    edited June 2010
    LOL that's going on facebook
  • Rather DashingRather Dashing
    edited June 2010
    Moral Orel: Sacrifice Rant
  • RemolayRemolay
    edited June 2010
    You fool! You gave cheese to a lactose intolerant volcano god.

    And of course my little gem "I had a Woody once." I swear to god we were watching Toy Story at the time
  • Comrade PantsComrade Pants
    edited June 2010
    Even in a book of lies sometimes you find truth. There is indeed a season for all things and now that I see you flesh-to-flesh and blood-to-blood I know I cannot raise my hand against you. But know this, you are my greatest disappointment. Does your master hear me? Atlas! You can kill me, but you will never have my city. My strength is not in steel and fire, that is what the parasites will never understand. A season for all things! A time to live and a time to die, a time to build... and a time to destroy!

    Andrew Ryan: [to Jack, as he enters Ryan's sanctuary] The assassin has overcome my final line of defense, and now he plans to murder me. In the end what separates a man from a slave? Money? Power? No, a man chooses, and a slave obeys!
    [pause]
    Andrew Ryan: You think you have memories. A farm. A family. An airplane. A crash. And then this place. Was their really a family? Did that airplane crash, or, was it hijacked? Forced down, forced down by something less than a man, something bred to sleepwalk through life unless activated by a simple phrase, spoken by their kindly master. Come in.
    [Jack enters Ryan's layer]
    Andrew Ryan: Stop, would you kindly?
    [Jack does]
    Andrew Ryan: Would you kindly, powerful phrase. Familiar phrase?
    [Cascade of memories of Atlas ordering Jack to perform various tasks with the phrase "Would you kindly"]
    Andrew Ryan: Sit, would you kindly? Stand, would you kindly? Run! Stop! Turn. Was a man sent to kill, or a slave?
    [Ryan hands Jack a golf club]
    Andrew Ryan: KILL!
    [Jack smacks Ryan with the club]
    Andrew Ryan: A man chooses!
    [Jack smacks him again]
    Andrew Ryan: A slave obeys!
    [Jack smacks him again]
    Andrew Ryan: OBEEEEEEY!
    [Jack kills Ryan]


    And of course, a YouTube link... because I love you all so much.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEjqY3_bCDk
  • mysterybowlermysterybowler
    edited June 2010
    Nimeni wrote: »
    This still makes me giggle like a love-struck school girl.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RB2GboGOuTI

    This is Genius :D

    Here is my fav last line of a film.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eLW5jzHsW7c
  • AlcoremortisAlcoremortis
    edited June 2010
    "This wind coming in, it feels like home. It's comforting and it soothes me. It tastes of freshly spilled blood and the rotting flesh of decaying corpses."
    -Hiei, Yu yu Hakusho
  • AvistewAvistew
    edited June 2010
    mysterybowler wrote: »
    This is Genius :D

    Here is my fav last line of a film.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eLW5jzHsW7c

    I've always loved that ending.
  • ScrawfflerScrawffler
    edited June 2010
    My favourite line from anything ever is from Simon the Sorcerer 2. Spoken by the title character:

    "Oh yes? Well, you see that dog poo? That's you, that is. That's your favourite food."


    But this line from Family Guy (spoken by Tom Tucker) comes in a very close second:

    "I'm sorry, but there's a handsome man in my spoon."
  • NimeniNimeni
    edited June 2010
    (Arrested Development, Michael trying to get info from the British embassy)

    Michael: I need to check the records for any British owned building businesses that would have applied for license about 10 years ago.
    Clerk: Oh, I'm so sorry! You need a UK passport to check those files. They're for British eyes only.
    Michael: Don't I look kind of British?
    Clerk: Perhaps if you're willing to lose 20 pounds.
    Narrator: The clerk was asking for a bribe, but this was lost on Michael.
    Michael: You- you do go right for the jugular.
  • JedExodusJedExodus
    edited June 2010
    Blackadder: 'Baldrick, in the Amazonian rain forests there are tribes of Indians as yet untouched by civilisation who have developed more convincing Charlie Chaplin impressions than yours.'
  • AlcoremortisAlcoremortis
    edited June 2010
    Oh...now we've brought in Blackadder...

    Blackadder: "They do say, Mrs Miggins, that verbal insults hurt more than physical pain. They are of course wrong, as you will soon discover when I stick this toasting fork in your head."
  • coolsomecoolsome
    edited June 2010
    Blackadder: I'm as poor as a church mouse, that's just had an enormous tax bill on the very day his wife ran off with another mouse, taking all the cheese.
  • ShaggEShaggE
    edited June 2010
    (Scrubs, a Dr. Cox rant)

    "I have a son now, I can't be old. I don't want to be the guy that when he brings his son to play in the park, people turn and stare and say 'Is he the father? Is he the grandfather? Is he the grandfather's grandfather? And why, oh why, is he pushing that traffic cone on the swing while his little boy sits in the mud and cries? Is he taunting the little boy? No, he can't even see the little boy. He's talking to the traffic cone, and oh look, he's actually putting the traffic cone into the minivan and driving away while his little boy still sits in the mud and cries, cries, cries, and the traffic cone sits quietly and watches Finding Nemo on DVD."
  • GaryCXJkGaryCXJk
    edited June 2010
    Remolay wrote: »
    You fool! You gave cheese to a lactose intolerant volcano god.

    you fool! you gave cheese to a lack toast and tolerant vulcano god!

    As discussed in this thread.
  • RemolayRemolay
    edited June 2010
    That failbook entry is the only reason I know that line now. I've yet to play Curse
  • S@breS@bre
    edited June 2010
    I could shoot you from Stuttgart and still create the proper effect!
  • doodo!doodo!
    edited June 2010
    Irishmile wrote: »
    Roy Batty's death scene is full of win....
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTzA_xesrL8

    I heard that he ad libbed the whole thing.
  • mysterybowlermysterybowler
    edited June 2010
    Avistew wrote: »
    I've always loved that ending.

    It's a great movie. Big fan of Billy Wilder.
  • VeronicanPlayVeronicanPlay
    edited June 2010
    Blackadder: Baldric, you wouldn't know a subtle plan, even if it painted it self purple, danced around while playing on a harpsichord singing subtle plans are here again.

    Blackadder: So what they would do was put their underwear on their head, two pencils in their nose, and say, Wible.

    And the whole talk about getting hot mud, with spit and dandruff and the chocolate sprinkles was cracking me up. :)
  • Secret FawfulSecret Fawful
    edited June 2010
    I picked lesser known or lesser remembered ones.

    "Maybe a real hero is the last one to hear about it. You pulled me out of the gutter and for that I owe you some thanks. Just remember, Fievel, one man's sunset is another man's dawn. I don't know what's out there beyond those hills, but if you ride yonder, head up, eyes steady, heart open, I think one day you'll find that you're the hero you've been looking for."
    - An American Tail: Fievel Goes West - Great final words by Jimmy Stewart in his final film role

    This whole sequence is also an incredible bit of writing.

    "What is going on!? I mean what the hell is going on!?"
    - Tremors

    "I had a little trouble with the fireplace."
    - The Hunchback of Notre Dame

    "That was not Mozart laughing, Father... that was God."
    -Amadeus

    "I heard that Curtis"
    -Spoony
  • MichaelDearmanUKMichaelDearmanUK
    edited June 2010
    Perry: Okay, let's get out of here...where's my gun?
    Harry: It's okay, I took care of it...I threw it into the lake...
    Perry: What? My $2000 ceramic Vektor my mother got me as a special gift. You threw it in the lake next to the car. What happens when they drag the lake? You think they'll find my pistol?(!) Jesus. Look up "idiot" in the dictionary. You know what you'll find?
    Harry: A...picture of me?
    Perry: No! The definition of the word idiot, which you f*****g are!

    ...and just about any other line from Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang. :D
  • FriarFriar
    edited June 2010
    Doctor:
    I wear a fez now, Fez's are cool.
    <very minor DW.5.13 spoilers.
  • tredlowtredlow
    edited June 2010
    Sauerkraut.. It takes PREPARATION!!
  • JedExodusJedExodus
    edited June 2010
    Brannigan: "Kiff, the way to a womans heart is through her parents. Have sex with them and you're in"
  • bubbledncrbubbledncr Telltale Alumni
    edited June 2010
    Mean Girls:

    "Did you have an awesome time? Did you drink awesome shooters, listen to awesome music, and then just sit around and soak up each others awesomeness?"

    "And on the third day, God created the Remington bolt-action rifle, so that Man could fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals. "

    Wedding Singer:

    "Yeah, go ahead, have a few drinks and, you know, drive home. "
  • MichaelDearmanUKMichaelDearmanUK
    edited June 2010
    Brannigan: We failed to uphold Brannigans law. But, I did make it with a hot alien space captain. And afterall, isn't that what man has dreamt of since he first looked up at the stars?...Kif I asked you a question.
    Kif: *sighs*
  • AlcoremortisAlcoremortis
    edited June 2010
    I feel like a Groucho quote:

    "...And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce it tastes much more like prunes than rhubarb does."

    -Animal Crackers
  • VeronicanPlayVeronicanPlay
    edited June 2010
    My signature is also a favourite quote of mine, it comes from Inspector Gadget 1. When John Brown/Gadget (Matthew Broderick) talks to Brenda Bradford (Joely Fisher) at the beginning of the movie.

    Ohh and here is one from Mock the Week.
    Frankie Boyle: Dear Diadre, I want to trace my father, can you suggest a good marker pen?
  • mysterybowlermysterybowler
    edited June 2010
    VeronicanPlay wrote: »
    Ohh and here is one from Mock the Week.
    Frankie Boyle: Dear Diadre, I want to trace my father, can you suggest a good marker pen?

    Saw Frankie recently in what appears to be his last tour. He is a very funny man. A couple of lines that had me wetting myself when I first heard them:

    Do you think George Bush actually knows who Gordon Brown is? He probably just thinks Tony Blair's put on weight and had a mild stroke.

    Scientists have just built the world's biggest supercollider, and they're doing experiments to see what makes up protons. I hope that if the experiment's successful, the whole of our reality will dissolve, and a big sign will up come that says: Level Two.
  • VeronicanPlayVeronicanPlay
    edited June 2010
    Frankie Boyle is a genius, he is really funny in Mock the Week.

    Frankie Boyle: When people heard that Mel Gibson had to be Scottish in Braveheart, they said it wouldn't work. And look at him now, and alcoholic racist.

    There is a lot more, especially when they do "Things you'd like to see" Frankie cracks me up all the time. Heck all of them do, it's just a funny show.
    One of my favourite shows when ever I am in England. :)

    Here is another quote from Mock the Week: Use the force Luke, I've run out of lubricant.
  • GuruGuru214GuruGuru214
    edited July 2010
    "Oh sure, everyone's always in favor of saving Hitler's brain, but when you put it in the body of a great white shark, ooooooooh, suddenly you've gone too far!"

    "Oooh, a lesson in not changing history from Mr. I'm My Own Grandpa! Let's get the hell out of here already! Screw history!"
    Anton Ego wrote:
    In many ways, the work of a critic is easy. We risk very little, yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves to our judgment. We thrive on negative criticism, which is fun to write and to read. But the bitter truth we critics must face, is that in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is probably more meaningful than our criticism designating it so. But there are times when a critic truly risks something, and that is in the discovery and defense of the new. The world is often unkind to new talents, new creations. The new needs friends.
  • KuroShiroKuroShiro
    edited July 2010
    So many. So, so many. Hm...

    "I'm brilliant as well as skilled. It's a great burden, all of that on top of my angelic good looks. But I try to soldier on as best I can."
    --Ramirez, from the Dresden Files (while riding on a reanimated zombie T-Rex)

    "An optimist says that the glass is half full. A pessimist says the glass is half empty. A Rationalist says the glass is twice as big as it needs to be."
    --Some philosopher guy
  • doodo!doodo!
    edited July 2010
    No one found that interesting? Geeze...i thought the guy was a genius when I heard that.
  • JedExodusJedExodus
    edited July 2010
    VeronicanPlay wrote: »
    Frankie Boyle is a genius, he is really funny in Mock the Week.

    I don't like him, he's just too rude for me to be honest. He doesn't offend me or anything like that, I just think he tries too hard to shock
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