Dammit, sorry I haven't keeping track of this, Hope. I haven't had the time to keep up with all of the stories I've wanted to. But I've finally caught up, and wow, I am really loving this story!
Chapter 2: “Among” - Part 4: “Bloodied Hands”
Atlanta
The two women approached the door cautiously. Jordan’s once soft, blue eyes th… moreat were now tried and surrounded by dark circles blinked. Atlanta slowly followed in Jordan’s wake as they looked at the bathroom door that caused a loud cracking sound to enter their ears. Suddenly, a second crack sounded from it, but much quieter than the first. Jordan gently placed on hand on the door and inspected it with a prolonged stare. “It’s rotten,” she muttered disappointedly, “the door frame is rotten.”
“What?” Atlanta hissed, a scared look grewing in her eyes. “How-- What are we going to do?”
“I…” Jordan mumbled incoherently, “I…” She closed her eyes tightly, causing several tears to roll out of her eyes and onto the cold floor. “I’ll stop them from breaking in.” She spoke bluntly. Her eyes shot open and she took hold of her combat knife.
“Hey!” Atlanta shouted. Startled by the sudde… [view original content]
Well, I'm glad you're still here! It's alright that you've had trouble keeping up, this story is just a story and shouldn't be put ahead of any school, personal matters, etc.
Oh a side note, I can confirm Clifford appearing in episode 3!
Well, I'm glad you're still here! It's alright that you've had trouble keeping up, this story is just a story and shouldn't be put ahead of any school, personal matters, etc.
Oh a side note, I can confirm Clifford appearing in episode 3!
Dammit, sorry I haven't keeping track of this, Hope. I haven't had the time to keep up with all of the stories I've wanted to. But I've finally caught up, and wow, I am really loving this story!
[Lower the gun.]
Well, I'm glad you're still here! It's alright that you've had trouble keeping up, this story is just a story and shouldn't be put ahead of any school, personal matters, etc.
Oh a side note, I can confirm Clifford appearing in episode 3!
I'm very sorry for keep you all waiting, but I've honestly have just put off writing for the last two days. I have however been writing the last Zayne PoV for this chapter and it will hopefully be done soon. It'll have a second PoV with it, likely a little bit of Lindsay's story. It will be the second to last part in this chapter, with the final part including the conclusion to what's going on with the former Harvest Hills group.
Another thing to mention: There was just a brief hail storm that lasted for about 5 minutes. Just to let you know if you don't hear from me, I'm probably not dead, my house's power could be out if it returns.
Edit: I might as well close the voting while I'm at it. Lower the gun wins. Consider it closed!
He grudgingly stepped through the light snow that began to fall about an hour after he left. His pistol in hand. Attuma had ended while staying with Vincent, but he thought to himself that it would have been a good idea to stay through winter. Although, with the thought of cannibals descending upon them during the night made him, he was constantly on edge. Luckily, there was also a bright side to the worsening weather - a subtle lack of roaming dead made the bitter cold well worth it.
Something caught his eye; a large pickup truck rested at the side of the road with little signs of recent activity, just several yards away and ripe for the picking. Zayne approached it, slowly and with caution as he eyed the vehicle. It had the fresh snowfall covering it’s surfaces. It appeared abandoned, or at least for the time being.
Now closely peering through the window that had frosted over, he looked at the cabin of the pickup. It possessed the usual leather seats that you would expect, but also had a blanket draped over the seat, likely to provide extra warmth. He stretched his neck to give him a view of the ignition; clearly lacking the car keys and upon further inspection he realized it was locked.
Taking a step back, he turned his vision to the bed of the pickup. The cold and hard ground crunched beneath his shoes as he neared it. He leaned over and look. It was rather dirty in the bed, but a clean blue canvas sheet covered a large object that rested just below the back window. Placing on foot on the hubcap of the back tire, he pulled himself up and step onto the pickup bed. He took hold of the blue canvas and lifted it as the light snow fell off and onto the truck’s bed.
He bent down on one knee to get a good look at it, and his head ducked down from view. It looked like a pile of salvaged scrap metal and all kinds of odd metal junk. Or at least things Zayne would consider junk, most of the stuff seemed unsalvageable, but someone was gathering them. Weird.
“Shut the fuck up!” A man yelled loudly. It caused Zayne to jump slightly, but he instinctively laid flat on his stomach and hunkered down in the pickup bed. Without him holding it up, the canvas fell back over the scrap metal. His breaths were fast and scared, but he quickly took note of this and slowed his breathing, tried to remain calm and then started listening. His ears were met by loud but muffled grunting, as well as the sound of the frozen grass crunching beneath feet. “J-just shut the fuck up and it’ll be a whole lot easier f-for all of us!” It was a different man, his voice wasn’t as deep and seemed to have a stutter.
At least two people were approaching, along with something else that continued to shout muffled cries.
Zayne quickly realized where they were heading. His eyes darted towards the blue canvas and he carefully crawled under up with his back touching the cold metal as he looked under it with a single widened eye. “Open the damn thing!” The man with a deep voice shouted as Zayne heard the heavy back end fall open. His eyes widened far more when he saw two people pull a man up and roughly drop him in the pickup bed. He had short and messy black hair and a thick beard. His hands and feet were bound with zip ties and his blue jeans and green shirt were covered with mud and melting snow.
“Haha!” The higher sounding voice laughed.
“C’mon, toss that scrap in the back with the rest and we’ll get going.” The man with the lower voice ordered. It quickly occurred to Zayne he was gonna be discovered, and if not that, the disturbed snow on the canvas could point towards his hiding spot. Out of worry, Zayne quietly held his pistol closer to his face and waited, if the man lifted the sheet, he could shoot him.
Zayne held his breath. The man took hold of the canvas sheet and began to lift it. Suddenly a very loud gunshot echoed through the air and the man began yelling, “f-f-fuck! I’ve-- I’ve been shot…!”
“Shit! Get in the--” The other barked, but a second shot ringed through the air and the sound of shattering glass filled Zayne’s ears. “Shit--” The man said again, “nearly took my head--” A third shot bellowed and the sound of splintering liquid briefly pierced Zayne’s ears, to his disgust. Zayne soon cringed in pain when a backpack full of what had to been heavy salvaged metal hit his neck.
“Fuck, man!” The remaining man grimace as the pickup’s door opened and the body of the man with the lower voice fell out of the truck and onto the ground in a heap. A fourth shot ringed hit the front right tire of the truck causing it to began deflating. “Shit--” The man muttered through shaky breaths as he grabbed the keys off the dead man and started the truck. As the truck started moving the fifth and final shot hit the side window, causing it to shatter like the front windshield.
The truck began to move very fast and would, here and there, skidding to the right. Zayne quickly realized his eyes were shut tightly and forced them open. He faced the man on the pickup bed, whose eyes were widened in a cold stare. The canvas was moved just enough to make him visible to the man. But the cold stare quickly turned to a happier expression, that Zayne could only guess with the gag covering his face was formed into a hopeful smile at the sight of a boy with a gun.
Lindsay
“We’ll head deeper into the city.” Lindsay sighed, regretfully. “Let’s just hope we don’t get pushed in a corner.”
“Sounds…” Keith paused and reached to his side to pull his assault rifle. “Alright…” He frowned giving the suburban area a longing look. “We don’t have much food left. We gotta hope there’s stuff in the city we can salvage.”
“We’ll be fine.” Lindsay smiled and took several steps towards their chosen destination. “We-- I… just need to know if he’s alive, or... “ She shook her head. “C’mon, let’s get on with it.”
Keith replied with a silent nodded and they began walking towards the city.
Just let everyone know and keep you somewhat updated, I've renamed the episodes to acts. The reason I've done this is to solve a problem I been having for the formatting of the chapters, since their honestly too long to be episode (at least to me) and their still pretty long in general, I thought I would change them. Earlier I was thinking about dividing the episodes further, but it seemed a little stretched when I did that. It's mostly personal preference on how the main post looks, so, yeah.
Anyway, I'm almost done with the chapter final and will be posting it later today! It features Jordan and Atlanta once again. And as I've said before, it'll mark the end of chapter 2: "Among."
She raised the two knifes in a fighting stance and waited as Atlanta stood in front of the door with her hand resting on the handle. “Again… I can’t emphasize this enough; are you sure?” Atlanta questioned, worryingly staring at Jordan. “If you fail-- Fuck, I can’t believe I’ve even considering letting you do this.” Atlanta regretfully shook her head. “But… I guess we would be dead either way, right?”
“Wrong,” Jordan muttered, keeping the sad expression but adding a defensive undertone to her voice. “I don’t plan to fail. I’m… I’m get this done. And I won’t stop until I’m done, then matter what, you close that door.” Jordan let out a shaky breath. “Anytime now… Whenever you’re ready.”
Atlanta painstakingly sighed and cringed as she turned the lock, out of the corner of her eye, Jordan lowered the two blades to her sides. “Be ready…” Atlanta scoffed as she turned the doorknob and it quickly fell open while she backed up and was trapped behind the door, just like they had planned.
A group of the dead quickly but grudgingly approached the only target in sight, Jordan. Who continued to hold her arms to her sides But as Atlanta peaked through the small crack provided by the door, she quickly and fearfully realized Jordan’s eyes were shut tightly. “What was she doing?!” Atlanta thought. “She could get them--” Her train of thought was interrupted by the first of many walkers nearing Jordan. A fearful expression filled Atlanta’s features as she began regretting trusting Jordan.
In split second Jordan’s eyelids darted open and revealed watery tears forming in them. About the first 10 walkers entering the bathroom neared her, but she didn’t move an inch. Finally, the first of the walkers was about more than a foot away. Jordan powerfully forced the knife into it’s skull and kept hold of it as it fell to the ground, using it’s sudden downwards momentum to swing her boot into the second walker’s face. It fell back and into the others as Jordan dug the second knife into the third walker’s head. And as that one fell, she pulled the knife still stuck in the skull with ease, then quickly digging it into the face of the next, being followed by a splatter of dark and rotten blood.
Jordan took wall-landed step back and the sharp blade slidded out of the walker’s face without the need to apply any force. With the step back, she dodged the incoming lunge of a walker and quickly replied with faceful of metal.
Atlanta’s eyes wandered to the door and the walker that continued to enter, but notable, that were slightly less frequent. But Jordan still had about 20 walkers in the bathroom with more entering every second.
As her attention turned to Jordan once again, she noticed the bodies of at least 10 walkers already dead on the floor as the remaining number of walkers continued their approach. Though, Jordan continued powering through them, but it seemed she was beginning to run out of room. It was a large bathroom, overall, but she was nearing it’s far end with about 10 feet between her and the wall. If she became trapped, she would be done for. Atlanta had to close the door, then and there, or else they could be over runned.
As one of last walkers entering the bathroom passed through the door, she slammed it shut and quickly turned the lock. This caught the attention of two walkers as they began ignoring Jordan and start walking back towards Atlanta. With their moans and grunts Atlanta reacted by kicking the first in the knee. It buckled under it’s own weight and the rotten, weakened flesh and bone snapped. The walker fell face first and Atlanta backed away, tripping and landing on her behind as the walker landed just right of her leg and crushed it’s jaw on the cold hard floor.
The second that Atlanta faced continued stumbling towards her as the other regained itself, relatively unphased while it continued its pursuit, forcing Atlanta to back into the corner she was hiding in minutes ago.
Jordan continued to violently kill off the remaining walkers with dodges and quick swipes. Her muscles weaken and tried, it became a pain to continue. She had already reached her limit, but she couldn’t stop there, not while any walkers still remained. She forcefully continued past her breaking point and dispatched the final walker in her way with one last kick to the forehead and it sent a brief splash of blood and rotten fresh into the air as it fell backwards. As it fell, almost cushioned by the bodies of the dead, Jordan jumped onto and delivered a final stab into it’s eye and it laid motionless.
Her eyes darted up and towards Atlanta as she saw her struggling with the two walkers. The tired and sad teary eyes filled with anger as she violently and surprisingly quickly crawled towards her with the intention to save her.
She come in sliding through the blood covering the ground and slammed her first knife into the side of the walker with the broken jaw while simultaneously tripping the second to fall on top of her. It’s teeth bared, the walker fell on Jordan as she forced the remaining knife into it’s lower jaw and through it’s head. It fell on top of her, much to her uncomfort. But she had barely any breath and was tired beyond messere, though she found it in her strength to push the walker off of her and it fell to her side.
“Are…” Atlanta stuttered with a shocked expression, “are you…. alright?”
Slowly, Jordan pushed herself up and leaned against the wall before answering. “I’m alive.” She claimed, shaken by the experience. She sniffled and Atlanta finally notice the tears pouring from Jordan’s eyes. Atlanta grabbed Jordan’s hand, despite the dark red blood coating it and Jordan gripped it tightly. Alive on the outside and unbitten, but what the inside? Jordan’s pain… it ran deep - deeper than Atlanta realized earlier, but now, she knew just how hurt she truly was.
End of Chapter 2: “Among”
Next time...
"Jesus Christ..." A figure muttered in shock as he shined his flashlight on Christian. Much to Christian's amazement, he recognized the voice and a forced smile appeared on his face. "Hey, Jake." He muttered weakly.
Vincent stood over a dead body of a man, whose head was missing a chunk of flesh as she rested in the snow. He turned his attention to a well marked trail where the truck left tore up grass. He began walking in that direction, leaving the corpse behind him.
Lindsay and Keith stood in a office space with a shared shocked expression.
"You'll-- You'll pay... one way or other. And I'm not even a little sad I won't see it... or know... but it'll happen, and that's enough for me..."
Chapter 2: “Among” - Part 6: “Pain Ran Deeper”
Atlanta
She raised the two knifes in a fighting stance and waited as Atlanta stood in… more front of the door with her hand resting on the handle. “Again… I can’t emphasize this enough; are you sure?” Atlanta questioned, worryingly staring at Jordan. “If you fail-- Fuck, I can’t believe I’ve even considering letting you do this.” Atlanta regretfully shook her head. “But… I guess we would be dead either way, right?”
“Wrong,” Jordan muttered, keeping the sad expression but adding a defensive undertone to her voice. “I don’t plan to fail. I’m… I’m get this done. And I won’t stop until I’m done, then matter what, you close that door.” Jordan let out a shaky breath. “Anytime now… Whenever you’re ready.”
Atlanta painstakingly sighed and cringed as she turned the lock, out of the corner of her eye, Jordan lowered the two blades to her sides. “Be ready…” Atlanta scoffed as she turned the doorknob… [view original content]
Chapter 2: “Among” - Part 6: “Pain Ran Deeper”
Atlanta
She raised the two knifes in a fighting stance and waited as Atlanta stood in… more front of the door with her hand resting on the handle. “Again… I can’t emphasize this enough; are you sure?” Atlanta questioned, worryingly staring at Jordan. “If you fail-- Fuck, I can’t believe I’ve even considering letting you do this.” Atlanta regretfully shook her head. “But… I guess we would be dead either way, right?”
“Wrong,” Jordan muttered, keeping the sad expression but adding a defensive undertone to her voice. “I don’t plan to fail. I’m… I’m get this done. And I won’t stop until I’m done, then matter what, you close that door.” Jordan let out a shaky breath. “Anytime now… Whenever you’re ready.”
Atlanta painstakingly sighed and cringed as she turned the lock, out of the corner of her eye, Jordan lowered the two blades to her sides. “Be ready…” Atlanta scoffed as she turned the doorknob… [view original content]
Well, overall it would still be Jerry and Josie for the same reasons I have mentioned the last time you asked. Right now my favourite is still Jerry, but with every part Josie is in the group again she starts to claim this position and I guess it won't be long until she is my undisputed favourite again. This does not mean I'll stop liking Jerry a lot, but of course I'll always be more biased towards Josie. However, neither of them appeared since last time you asked, so I think I should also mention that my favourite character in the last few parts was Atlanta. Last time you asked I also mentioned Jordan here, but her actions kind off prevent me from listing her among my favourite characters anymore. Time will tell if it stays that way, but for now I feel too conflicted about her.
Who are your least favorite characters and why?
Again, not much has changed. Zafir, Jake and Clarice for being assholes who enslaved the group. I'm still having the theory that Jake might be the third guy who kidnapped Josie and Lindsay, in which case he would easily be my least favourite character by far, actually I would hate him enough to make Zafir and Clarice look like saints next to him. In general I should maybe list the third guy who helped kidnapping Josie and Lindsay here. I mean, Jordan sort of redeemed herself and the other two guys are dead, but she mentioned a third guy, so one asshole is still out there, ready to pay. And no matter who it is, this person is probably truly my least favourite character.
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why?
Jordan, who is in fact the only character I have a mixed opinion on and I feel really conflicted about her. I like her character and I like her current actions, but her role in kidnapping Josie made me almost hate her enough to call for her death regardless. Her role in protecting Josie however caused me to be very conflicted about her. I don't hate her and I don't think I will, except if anything she told Atlanta was a lie of some sorts. But I also don't like her anymore in particular. However, I can only guess that part of my very conflicted view on Jordan is because she kidnapped Josie. If it would have been Ashley or only Lindsay, I assume I would be quicker to forgive, especially after the many good things she did. I'm curious how Josie will react to her once she finds out and how Jordan will react to Josie, especially since they had no interaction so far. I see two possibilities how this could go, either Josie forgives her, which would probably make me like Jordan a bit more too, or Josie will hate her for it, in which case I have to support her. However, I can't really see that, since Josie does not seem to be someone who holds grudges like that, especially considering what Jordan did to atone for it. I assume she will feel conflicted about her at worst, but will probably forgive her. Still, I'm looking forward to find out her thoughts about Jordan.
What characters do you sympathize with and why?
I admire Jerry's new outlook on how he views the group and sympathize with his protective instinct. Naturally I sympathize a lot with Josie and feel very sorry for the stuff that happened to her. However, she has some friends around who could help her, so I guess things could be worse for her. And I think Ashley is very likeable for the way she acts around Dan. Maybe I should admit that I slightly sympathize with Jordan. Her backstory is quite tragic and does wonders in making me sympathize with her.
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter?
This chapter was awesome and I enjoyed it a lot. It helped a great deal in understanding the character of Jordan and while I still resent her involvement in the kidnapping you also managed to prevent me from hating her. I liked it slightly less than Trauma for some reason I can't really grasp, but all in all I still loved it.
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share?
Always!
"Jesus Christ..." A figure muttered in shock as he shined his flashlight on Christian. Much to Christian's amazement, he recognized the voice and a forced smile appeared on his face. "Hey, Jake." He muttered weakly.
The people following the group are indeed the mall people and I can only guess that this means they are out for blood. The fact that Christian is happy to see this asshole Jake probably means that they save the group out of immediate danger though, probably by killing the rest of the walkers. However, nothing good will come out of the mall assholes interacting with the group again, I'm sure about that.
Vincent stood over a dead body of a man, whose head was missing a chunk of flesh as she rested in the snow. He turned his attention to a well marked trail where the truck left tore up grass. He began walking in that direction, leaving the corpse behind him.
I guess Vincent will either get a storyline of his own, or he will follow Zayne in an attempt to rescue him.
Lindsay and Keith stood in a office space with a shared shocked expression.
Since Lindsay and Keith are looking for Lindsay's dad this could be a dad-related shocked expression. However, as far as I know shocked expression doesn't always need to be negative. Maybe they find her dad in a very unlikely place or moment. Or maybe something else happens and the shock is negative.
"You'll-- You'll pay... one way or other. And I'm not even a little sad I won't see it... or know... but it'll happen, and that's enough for me..."
There are two possibilities I see here. One possibility would be Josie talking to Jordan and not forgiving her, but like I said above, that is not very likely. However, the second and much more likely possibility would be that this is a sentence uttered by Clarice. Since the mall assholes will interact with the Harvest Hills group again this could be Clarice talking to Jerry, swearing her revenge on him. Even though from my point Jerry was perfectly justified in killing Vincent, I think Clarice sees this from a slightly different angle. But then there is the choice of words here. Assuming it is Clarice, she says that she won't be around to see Jerry pay and won't even know it, which makes me think these are some sort of dying words from her. My speculation would be that she somehow makes sure that Jerry is going to die, or thinks that Jerry is as good as dead, but get's mortally wounded in the process, telling him these words with her final breath.
Any questions you want to ask?
Not right now, but maybe I'll find some questions later.
So, I'm probably going to start doing this at the end of each chapter.... I have several questions, but I'll try not to bombard you with too… more many
Who are your favorite characters and why?
Who are your least favorite characters and why?
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why?
What characters do you sympathize with and why?
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter?
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share?
Any questions you want to ask?
Chapter 2: “Among” - Part 6: “Pain Ran Deeper”
Atlanta
She raised the two knifes in a fighting stance and waited as Atlanta stood in… more front of the door with her hand resting on the handle. “Again… I can’t emphasize this enough; are you sure?” Atlanta questioned, worryingly staring at Jordan. “If you fail-- Fuck, I can’t believe I’ve even considering letting you do this.” Atlanta regretfully shook her head. “But… I guess we would be dead either way, right?”
“Wrong,” Jordan muttered, keeping the sad expression but adding a defensive undertone to her voice. “I don’t plan to fail. I’m… I’m get this done. And I won’t stop until I’m done, then matter what, you close that door.” Jordan let out a shaky breath. “Anytime now… Whenever you’re ready.”
Atlanta painstakingly sighed and cringed as she turned the lock, out of the corner of her eye, Jordan lowered the two blades to her sides. “Be ready…” Atlanta scoffed as she turned the doorknob… [view original content]
I'm still having the theory that Jake might be the third guy who kidnapped Josie and Lindsay, in which case he would easily be my least favo… morerite character by far, actually I would hate him enough to make Zafir and Clarice look like saints next to him.
I have plans to end this 'storyline' very soon. I will only comment that the third kidnapper is a submitted character...
I guess Vincent will either get a storyline of his own, or he will follow Zayne in an attempt to rescue him.
Pretty much. I also plan to included plenty of Vincent flashbacks so I can start revealing his backstory
There are two possibilities I see here. One possibility would be Josie talking to Jordan and not forgiving her, but like I said above, that is not very likely. However, the second and much more likely possibility would be that this is a sentence uttered by Clarice.
Interesting theory... >.>
Again, I'm sorry I can't commen… [view original content]
I'm still having the theory that Jake might be the third guy who kidnapped Josie and Lindsay, in which case he would easily be my least favorite character by far, actually I would hate him enough to make Zafir and Clarice look like saints next to him.
I have plans to end this 'storyline' very soon. I will only comment that the third kidnapper is a submitted character...
I guess Vincent will either get a storyline of his own, or he will follow Zayne in an attempt to rescue him.
Pretty much. I also plan to included plenty of Vincent flashbacks so I can start revealing his backstory
There are two possibilities I see here. One possibility would be Josie talking to Jordan and not forgiving her, but like I said above, that is not very likely. However, the second and much more likely possibility would be that this is a sentence uttered by Clarice.
Interesting theory... >.>
Again, I'm sorry I can't comment of too much of this, but I really appreciate the effort put into your answers. Let's hope a lot of this mysteries are answered within the story...
Who are your favorite characters and why?
Well, overall it would still be Jerry and Josie for the same reasons I have mentioned the last … moretime you asked. Right now my favourite is still Jerry, but with every part Josie is in the group again she starts to claim this position and I guess it won't be long until she is my undisputed favourite again. This does not mean I'll stop liking Jerry a lot, but of course I'll always be more biased towards Josie. However, neither of them appeared since last time you asked, so I think I should also mention that my favourite character in the last few parts was Atlanta. Last time you asked I also mentioned Jordan here, but her actions kind off prevent me from listing her among my favourite characters anymore. Time will tell if it stays that way, but for now I feel too conflicted about her.
Who are your least favorite characters and why?
Again, not much has changed. Zafir, Jake and Clarice for being ass… [view original content]
Thanks!
He'll develop more soon. It's pretty hard to give all the characters equal screen time, but I'm trying my best. You can expect more of him soon
This is going to be a very long story. I don't plan to make a season two. But I might expand it before I've reached the end, though I still have a very clear ending in mind.
Who are your favorite characters and why? Jerry. Handsome devil. Josephine is good too, Jerry X Josephine, JJ lol.
Who are your least favorite characters and why? Clarice, Zafir. Big assholes. Dicks, jerks, dolts, etc. I have no sympathy for them and gladly will kill them if given a good opportunity.
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why? Jordan. I really want to hate her. Like, to the extreme. She reminds me of Bonnie, walking the line between like or hate. Dean, although he wasn't my favorite character, is dead cause of her, but people escaped so yeah, I dunno.
What characters do you sympathize with and why? Josephine, cause she's still an emotional train wreck. Atlanta too, with the scenes with Jordan getting something from me.
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter? Pretty good. A little boring at times, and it's kind of hard to follow at times, I still love it though.
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share?
Yes:
"You'll-- You'll pay... one way or other. And I'm not even a little sad I won't see it... or know... but it'll happen, and that's enough for me..."
Zafir or Clarice. Speaking to Jerry most likely. The person talking is bit, but they're trapped in someplace surrounded by walkers or something.
Jesus Christ..." A figure muttered in shock as he shined his flashlight on Christian. Much to Christian's amazement, he recognized the voice and a forced smile appeared on his face. "Hey, Jake." He muttered weakly.
Shoot him.
Any questions you want to ask? Why did Keith and Lindsay go off on their own and not stay with the group to look for her father? Or was this explained and I forget
So, I'm probably going to start doing this at the end of each chapter.... I have several questions, but I'll try not to bombard you with too… more many
Who are your favorite characters and why?
Who are your least favorite characters and why?
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why?
What characters do you sympathize with and why?
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter?
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share?
Any questions you want to ask?
Pretty good. A little boring at times, and it's kind of hard to follow at times, I still love it though.
I'm glad you can put up with my sloppy writing. But I've diffidently been improving and I hope to continue to up my writing quality
Why did Keith and Lindsay go off on their own and not stay with the group to look for her father? Or was this explained and I forget
It wasn't explained in great detail and I have to admit, I went about it the wrong way and should have followed the Harvest Hills group a little more after they left the mall. To explain it; Lindsay and Keith were a item before the apocalypse and broke up not long before it began. They've left the main group to look for Lindsay's father and Keith set out to help her find him. And that's about it. I know this didn't really answer your question, sorry, but that's all I can say at this time.
Who are your favorite characters and why? Jerry. Handsome devil. Josephine is good too, Jerry X Josephine, JJ lol.
Who are your least fav… moreorite characters and why? Clarice, Zafir. Big assholes. Dicks, jerks, dolts, etc. I have no sympathy for them and gladly will kill them if given a good opportunity.
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why? Jordan. I really want to hate her. Like, to the extreme. She reminds me of Bonnie, walking the line between like or hate. Dean, although he wasn't my favorite character, is dead cause of her, but people escaped so yeah, I dunno.
What characters do you sympathize with and why? Josephine, cause she's still an emotional train wreck. Atlanta too, with the scenes with Jordan getting something from me.
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter? Pretty good. A little boring at times, and it's kind of hard to follow at times, I still love it though.
Any speculation on the… [view original content]
Who are your favorite characters and why? ASHLEY AND DAN BECAUSE BTW
Who are your least favorite characters and why? Duwww Jordan. SHE KILLED DEAN
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why? Jake because he was the nice in the mall but he is a douche in the next chapter thingy
What characters do you sympathize with and why? JOSEPHINE AND BECAUSE SHE IS JOSEPHINE
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter? It was cool , but i hate that when you get it off of Jerry you didn´t leave a single part of developement to Ashley.
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share? Jake coming back abd being a creep , Vincent rescuing Zayne , Lindsay and Keith fouding someone murdered brutally or her father and Clarice doing her thing
Any questions you want to ask? Do the bandits that attacked the Martinez are the same that attacked Zayne?
So, I'm probably going to start doing this at the end of each chapter.... I have several questions, but I'll try not to bombard you with too… more many
Who are your favorite characters and why?
Who are your least favorite characters and why?
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why?
What characters do you sympathize with and why?
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter?
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share?
Any questions you want to ask?
you didn´t leave a single part of developement to Ashley
In due time, Sagig, in due time.
Do the bandits that attacked the Martinez are the same that attacked Zayne?
It hasn't been fully explained, but Zayne is in Colorado and about 2 months ahead of the Harvest Hills' current point of view. So they're about two states away and 2 months in the future, but I can completely confirm that aren't the same people.
Who are your favorite characters and why? ASHLEY AND DAN BECAUSE BTW
Who are your least favorite characters and why? Duwww Jordan. SHE KI… moreLLED DEAN
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why? Jake because he was the nice in the mall but he is a douche in the next chapter thingy
What characters do you sympathize with and why? JOSEPHINE AND BECAUSE SHE IS JOSEPHINE
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter? It was cool , but i hate that when you get it off of Jerry you didn´t leave a single part of developement to Ashley.
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share? Jake coming back abd being a creep , Vincent rescuing Zayne , Lindsay and Keith fouding someone murdered brutally or her father and Clarice doing her thing
Any questions you want to ask? Do the bandits that attacked the Martinez are the same that attacked Zayne?
Atlanta and she was my favorite since the first chapter, I don't know why it's just what I feel
Who are your least favorite characters and why?
Jordan... I don't like her! good intentions, she never wanted to do harm yada yada yada I ain't buying it
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why?
Jerry. I don't hate him but I also don't like him so much, he's a fine character and he had great development but I'm still not so sure about him
What characters do you sympathize with and why?
Atlanta. I really like the emotional stuff she's going through
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter?
Great chapter, it felt like a chore to read some of the parts but they were very few and for the most parts it was great and I really like it, really looking forward for the next episode
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share?
"Jesus Christ..." A figure muttered in shock as he shined his flashlight on Christian. Much to Christian's amazement, he recognized the voice and a forced smile appeared on his face. "Hey, Jake." He muttered weakly.
Oh, fuck
Vincent stood over a dead body of a man, whose head was missing a chunk of flesh as she rested in the snow. He turned his attention to a well marked trail where the truck left tore up grass. He began walking in that direction, leaving the corpse behind him.
Cannibals? I think Vince will rescue Zayne again, I do like it that you write him as a sort of lone wolf type
"You'll-- You'll pay... one way or other. And I'm not even a little sad I won't see it... or know... but it'll happen, and that's enough for me..."
I could speculate but it can be many people, it does seems like a someone's last words
Jerry X Josephine
The shipping has began!
Pretty good. A little boring at times, and it's kind of hard to follow at times, I … morestill love it though.
I'm glad you can put up with my sloppy writing. But I've diffidently been improving and I hope to continue to up my writing quality
Why did Keith and Lindsay go off on their own and not stay with the group to look for her father? Or was this explained and I forget
It wasn't explained in great detail and I have to admit, I went about it the wrong way and should have followed the Harvest Hills group a little more after they left the mall. To explain it; Lindsay and Keith were a item before the apocalypse and broke up not long before it began. They've left the main group to look for Lindsay's father and Keith set out to help her find him. And that's about it. I know this didn't really answer your question, sorry, but that's all I can say at this time.
Atlanta and she was my favorite since the first chapter, I don't know why it's just what I feel
Just one of those characters that clicks for ya. I understand that.
Jordan... I don't like her! good intentions, she never wanted to do harm yada yada yada I ain't buying it
Again, perfectly understandable. But I shall continue my mind games nonetheless!
Jerry. I don't hate him but I also don't like him so much, he's a fine character and he had great development but I'm still not so sure about him
Since he's not completely stable this makes sense.
Great chapter, it felt like a chore to read some of the parts but they were very few and for the most parts it was great and I really like it, really looking forward for the next episode
I know what you mean. I'm gonna start trying to make parts more meaningful and entertaining. It's a little hard to do right now, but I'm gonna try to shy away from using filler.
Cannibals? I think Vince will rescue Zayne again, I do like it that you write him as a sort of lone wolf type
Considering he was likely the one who tried to save Zayne in his last part, it's kind of obvious that he is going to do something about it. But again with the filler aspect, it would be quite boring to show him tracking him, so I plan to have a small mixer of that, Zayne's point of view, and flashbacks to start chipping away at Vincent's backstory!
So I just read the last 2 chapters
Who are your favorite characters and why?
Atlanta and she was my favorite since the first chapt… moreer, I don't know why it's just what I feel
Who are your least favorite characters and why?
Jordan... I don't like her! good intentions, she never wanted to do harm yada yada yada I ain't buying it
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why?
Jerry. I don't hate him but I also don't like him so much, he's a fine character and he had great development but I'm still not so sure about him
What characters do you sympathize with and why?
Atlanta. I really like the emotional stuff she's going through
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter?
Great chapter, it felt like a chore to read some of the parts but they were very few and for the most parts it was great and I really like it, really looking forward for the next episode
Any speculation on the preview you w… [view original content]
Josephine x Problems.
Josephine x More Problems
No, no, I'm not shipping that. I'm totally not shipping that. Josie and probl… moreems have basically no chemistry at all.
How about Josephine x No Problems? Wouldn't that be a nice ship? They have so much in common.
Or Josephine x Happy Ending? That's an OTP. They are practically meant for each other!
Considering you have some called 'Deny the End' it's safe to say I will deny it.
Planning ahead is SO fun. Form relationships, have great story arcs.....then BAM
I never have an answer for the favorite characters question so I void that
Who are your least favorite characters and why? Jordan. I just don't trust her, I don't know why.
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why? Jerry. He's changed over the transition of act one and two.
What characters do you sympathize with and why? I don't really know for this one. Jordan and Christian have been put through a lot (then again everyone has) since the mall and have a pretty upsetting back story.
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter? mmmmm nothing really
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share? mayb ok
"Jesus Christ..." A figure muttered in shock as he shined his flashlight on Christian. Much to Christian's amazement, he recognized the voice and a forced smile appeared on his face. "Hey, Jake." He muttered weakly.
Well we're told that the figure is Jake so I'm going on a limb (pun not intended) and going to say that Christian is close to fucked by the time Jake shows up. What really gets me tho is that he's weak and forcing a smile and with Jake now so he's either going to get help or die. Either way he's fucked. It also makes me wonder how Jake wound up in South Texas. Time will tell I guess.
Vincent stood over a dead body of a man, whose head was missing a chunk of flesh as she rested in the snow. He turned his attention to a well marked trail where the truck left tore up grass. He began walking in that direction, leaving the corpse behind him.
So this is going to start the body count. This right here. Vincent is probably going after Zayne. Like 90% chance.
Lindsay and Keith stood in a office space with a shared shocked expression.
Which father will it be? Zafir or Gregory, only one knows.
"You'll-- You'll pay... one way or other. And I'm not even a little sad I won't see it... or know... but it'll happen, and that's enough for me..."
I agree with Liquid. This might be Clarice to Jerry. Probably.
Any questions you want to ask? Not at the moment but I'll think of some later probably
Chapter 2: “Among” - Part 6: “Pain Ran Deeper”
Atlanta
She raised the two knifes in a fighting stance and waited as Atlanta stood in… more front of the door with her hand resting on the handle. “Again… I can’t emphasize this enough; are you sure?” Atlanta questioned, worryingly staring at Jordan. “If you fail-- Fuck, I can’t believe I’ve even considering letting you do this.” Atlanta regretfully shook her head. “But… I guess we would be dead either way, right?”
“Wrong,” Jordan muttered, keeping the sad expression but adding a defensive undertone to her voice. “I don’t plan to fail. I’m… I’m get this done. And I won’t stop until I’m done, then matter what, you close that door.” Jordan let out a shaky breath. “Anytime now… Whenever you’re ready.”
Atlanta painstakingly sighed and cringed as she turned the lock, out of the corner of her eye, Jordan lowered the two blades to her sides. “Be ready…” Atlanta scoffed as she turned the doorknob… [view original content]
I never have an answer for the favorite characters question so I void that
Come to think of it... it's kind of smart that you don't reveal your favorite characters to me. If you did, i'd know what characters you wouldn't want to be killed... That doesn't mean I would kill characters that are loved, though, it kind of does.
Jordan. I just don't trust her, I don't know why.
I get this. She's not really the most trustworthy person with them, but that's mostly based on speculation, and hasn't done anything to hurt the group since she helped kidnap Josie and Lindsay. But even then she was tricked. Of course... people could think she's lying, which is also understandable. Though I think another character will be joining yours and many others least favorite slots... very soon...
Jerry. He's changed over the transition of act one and two.
I can see how his past actions in act one could sour one's opinion of Jerry, that and the fact that he's not completely stable. But he has come a long way from the asshole in the first three chapters.
I never have an answer for the favorite characters question so I void that
Who are your least favorite characters and why? Jordan. I just… more don't trust her, I don't know why.
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why? Jerry. He's changed over the transition of act one and two.
What characters do you sympathize with and why? I don't really know for this one. Jordan and Christian have been put through a lot (then again everyone has) since the mall and have a pretty upsetting back story.
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter? mmmmm nothing really
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share? mayb ok
"Jesus Christ..." A figure muttered in shock as he shined his flashlight on Christian. Much to Christian's amazement, he recognized the voice and a forced smile appeared on his face. "Hey, Jake." He muttered weakly.
Well we're told that the figure is Jake so I'm going on a limb (pun n… [view original content]
Comments
[Lower the gun.]
Yeah...It's called homicide and you do 25 to life for it
Dammit, sorry I haven't keeping track of this, Hope. I haven't had the time to keep up with all of the stories I've wanted to. But I've finally caught up, and wow, I am really loving this story!
[Lower the gun.]
Well, I'm glad you're still here! It's alright that you've had trouble keeping up, this story is just a story and shouldn't be put ahead of any school, personal matters, etc.
Oh a side note, I can confirm Clifford appearing in episode 3!
That's the first thing I thought of when I got the character
Ha, thanks! Yeah, I'm finally getting more free time with only one quarter of the school year left. Thanks for understanding!
And sounds good! Can't wait!
I'm very sorry for keep you all waiting, but I've honestly have just put off writing for the last two days. I have however been writing the last Zayne PoV for this chapter and it will hopefully be done soon. It'll have a second PoV with it, likely a little bit of Lindsay's story. It will be the second to last part in this chapter, with the final part including the conclusion to what's going on with the former Harvest Hills group.
Another thing to mention: There was just a brief hail storm that lasted for about 5 minutes. Just to let you know if you don't hear from me, I'm probably not dead, my house's power could be out if it returns.
Edit: I might as well close the voting while I'm at it. Lower the gun wins. Consider it closed!
Chapter 2: “Among” - Part 5: “A Cold Stare”
Zayne
He grudgingly stepped through the light snow that began to fall about an hour after he left. His pistol in hand. Attuma had ended while staying with Vincent, but he thought to himself that it would have been a good idea to stay through winter. Although, with the thought of cannibals descending upon them during the night made him, he was constantly on edge. Luckily, there was also a bright side to the worsening weather - a subtle lack of roaming dead made the bitter cold well worth it.
Something caught his eye; a large pickup truck rested at the side of the road with little signs of recent activity, just several yards away and ripe for the picking. Zayne approached it, slowly and with caution as he eyed the vehicle. It had the fresh snowfall covering it’s surfaces. It appeared abandoned, or at least for the time being.
Now closely peering through the window that had frosted over, he looked at the cabin of the pickup. It possessed the usual leather seats that you would expect, but also had a blanket draped over the seat, likely to provide extra warmth. He stretched his neck to give him a view of the ignition; clearly lacking the car keys and upon further inspection he realized it was locked.
Taking a step back, he turned his vision to the bed of the pickup. The cold and hard ground crunched beneath his shoes as he neared it. He leaned over and look. It was rather dirty in the bed, but a clean blue canvas sheet covered a large object that rested just below the back window. Placing on foot on the hubcap of the back tire, he pulled himself up and step onto the pickup bed. He took hold of the blue canvas and lifted it as the light snow fell off and onto the truck’s bed.
He bent down on one knee to get a good look at it, and his head ducked down from view. It looked like a pile of salvaged scrap metal and all kinds of odd metal junk. Or at least things Zayne would consider junk, most of the stuff seemed unsalvageable, but someone was gathering them. Weird.
“Shut the fuck up!” A man yelled loudly. It caused Zayne to jump slightly, but he instinctively laid flat on his stomach and hunkered down in the pickup bed. Without him holding it up, the canvas fell back over the scrap metal. His breaths were fast and scared, but he quickly took note of this and slowed his breathing, tried to remain calm and then started listening. His ears were met by loud but muffled grunting, as well as the sound of the frozen grass crunching beneath feet. “J-just shut the fuck up and it’ll be a whole lot easier f-for all of us!” It was a different man, his voice wasn’t as deep and seemed to have a stutter.
At least two people were approaching, along with something else that continued to shout muffled cries.
Zayne quickly realized where they were heading. His eyes darted towards the blue canvas and he carefully crawled under up with his back touching the cold metal as he looked under it with a single widened eye. “Open the damn thing!” The man with a deep voice shouted as Zayne heard the heavy back end fall open. His eyes widened far more when he saw two people pull a man up and roughly drop him in the pickup bed. He had short and messy black hair and a thick beard. His hands and feet were bound with zip ties and his blue jeans and green shirt were covered with mud and melting snow.
“Haha!” The higher sounding voice laughed.
“C’mon, toss that scrap in the back with the rest and we’ll get going.” The man with the lower voice ordered. It quickly occurred to Zayne he was gonna be discovered, and if not that, the disturbed snow on the canvas could point towards his hiding spot. Out of worry, Zayne quietly held his pistol closer to his face and waited, if the man lifted the sheet, he could shoot him.
Zayne held his breath. The man took hold of the canvas sheet and began to lift it. Suddenly a very loud gunshot echoed through the air and the man began yelling, “f-f-fuck! I’ve-- I’ve been shot…!”
“Shit! Get in the--” The other barked, but a second shot ringed through the air and the sound of shattering glass filled Zayne’s ears. “Shit--” The man said again, “nearly took my head--” A third shot bellowed and the sound of splintering liquid briefly pierced Zayne’s ears, to his disgust. Zayne soon cringed in pain when a backpack full of what had to been heavy salvaged metal hit his neck.
“Fuck, man!” The remaining man grimace as the pickup’s door opened and the body of the man with the lower voice fell out of the truck and onto the ground in a heap. A fourth shot ringed hit the front right tire of the truck causing it to began deflating. “Shit--” The man muttered through shaky breaths as he grabbed the keys off the dead man and started the truck. As the truck started moving the fifth and final shot hit the side window, causing it to shatter like the front windshield.
The truck began to move very fast and would, here and there, skidding to the right. Zayne quickly realized his eyes were shut tightly and forced them open. He faced the man on the pickup bed, whose eyes were widened in a cold stare. The canvas was moved just enough to make him visible to the man. But the cold stare quickly turned to a happier expression, that Zayne could only guess with the gag covering his face was formed into a hopeful smile at the sight of a boy with a gun.
Lindsay
“We’ll head deeper into the city.” Lindsay sighed, regretfully. “Let’s just hope we don’t get pushed in a corner.”
“Sounds…” Keith paused and reached to his side to pull his assault rifle. “Alright…” He frowned giving the suburban area a longing look. “We don’t have much food left. We gotta hope there’s stuff in the city we can salvage.”
“We’ll be fine.” Lindsay smiled and took several steps towards their chosen destination. “We-- I… just need to know if he’s alive, or... “ She shook her head. “C’mon, let’s get on with it.”
Keith replied with a silent nodded and they began walking towards the city.
To be continued...
Just let everyone know and keep you somewhat updated, I've renamed the episodes to acts. The reason I've done this is to solve a problem I been having for the formatting of the chapters, since their honestly too long to be episode (at least to me) and their still pretty long in general, I thought I would change them. Earlier I was thinking about dividing the episodes further, but it seemed a little stretched when I did that. It's mostly personal preference on how the main post looks, so, yeah.
Anyway, I'm almost done with the chapter final and will be posting it later today! It features Jordan and Atlanta once again. And as I've said before, it'll mark the end of chapter 2: "Among."
Chapter 2: “Among” - Part 6: “Pain Ran Deeper”
Atlanta
She raised the two knifes in a fighting stance and waited as Atlanta stood in front of the door with her hand resting on the handle. “Again… I can’t emphasize this enough; are you sure?” Atlanta questioned, worryingly staring at Jordan. “If you fail-- Fuck, I can’t believe I’ve even considering letting you do this.” Atlanta regretfully shook her head. “But… I guess we would be dead either way, right?”
“Wrong,” Jordan muttered, keeping the sad expression but adding a defensive undertone to her voice. “I don’t plan to fail. I’m… I’m get this done. And I won’t stop until I’m done, then matter what, you close that door.” Jordan let out a shaky breath. “Anytime now… Whenever you’re ready.”
Atlanta painstakingly sighed and cringed as she turned the lock, out of the corner of her eye, Jordan lowered the two blades to her sides. “Be ready…” Atlanta scoffed as she turned the doorknob and it quickly fell open while she backed up and was trapped behind the door, just like they had planned.
A group of the dead quickly but grudgingly approached the only target in sight, Jordan. Who continued to hold her arms to her sides But as Atlanta peaked through the small crack provided by the door, she quickly and fearfully realized Jordan’s eyes were shut tightly. “What was she doing?!” Atlanta thought. “She could get them--” Her train of thought was interrupted by the first of many walkers nearing Jordan. A fearful expression filled Atlanta’s features as she began regretting trusting Jordan.
In split second Jordan’s eyelids darted open and revealed watery tears forming in them. About the first 10 walkers entering the bathroom neared her, but she didn’t move an inch. Finally, the first of the walkers was about more than a foot away. Jordan powerfully forced the knife into it’s skull and kept hold of it as it fell to the ground, using it’s sudden downwards momentum to swing her boot into the second walker’s face. It fell back and into the others as Jordan dug the second knife into the third walker’s head. And as that one fell, she pulled the knife still stuck in the skull with ease, then quickly digging it into the face of the next, being followed by a splatter of dark and rotten blood.
Jordan took wall-landed step back and the sharp blade slidded out of the walker’s face without the need to apply any force. With the step back, she dodged the incoming lunge of a walker and quickly replied with faceful of metal.
Atlanta’s eyes wandered to the door and the walker that continued to enter, but notable, that were slightly less frequent. But Jordan still had about 20 walkers in the bathroom with more entering every second.
As her attention turned to Jordan once again, she noticed the bodies of at least 10 walkers already dead on the floor as the remaining number of walkers continued their approach. Though, Jordan continued powering through them, but it seemed she was beginning to run out of room. It was a large bathroom, overall, but she was nearing it’s far end with about 10 feet between her and the wall. If she became trapped, she would be done for. Atlanta had to close the door, then and there, or else they could be over runned.
As one of last walkers entering the bathroom passed through the door, she slammed it shut and quickly turned the lock. This caught the attention of two walkers as they began ignoring Jordan and start walking back towards Atlanta. With their moans and grunts Atlanta reacted by kicking the first in the knee. It buckled under it’s own weight and the rotten, weakened flesh and bone snapped. The walker fell face first and Atlanta backed away, tripping and landing on her behind as the walker landed just right of her leg and crushed it’s jaw on the cold hard floor.
The second that Atlanta faced continued stumbling towards her as the other regained itself, relatively unphased while it continued its pursuit, forcing Atlanta to back into the corner she was hiding in minutes ago.
Jordan continued to violently kill off the remaining walkers with dodges and quick swipes. Her muscles weaken and tried, it became a pain to continue. She had already reached her limit, but she couldn’t stop there, not while any walkers still remained. She forcefully continued past her breaking point and dispatched the final walker in her way with one last kick to the forehead and it sent a brief splash of blood and rotten fresh into the air as it fell backwards. As it fell, almost cushioned by the bodies of the dead, Jordan jumped onto and delivered a final stab into it’s eye and it laid motionless.
Her eyes darted up and towards Atlanta as she saw her struggling with the two walkers. The tired and sad teary eyes filled with anger as she violently and surprisingly quickly crawled towards her with the intention to save her.
She come in sliding through the blood covering the ground and slammed her first knife into the side of the walker with the broken jaw while simultaneously tripping the second to fall on top of her. It’s teeth bared, the walker fell on Jordan as she forced the remaining knife into it’s lower jaw and through it’s head. It fell on top of her, much to her uncomfort. But she had barely any breath and was tired beyond messere, though she found it in her strength to push the walker off of her and it fell to her side.
“Are…” Atlanta stuttered with a shocked expression, “are you…. alright?”
Slowly, Jordan pushed herself up and leaned against the wall before answering. “I’m alive.” She claimed, shaken by the experience. She sniffled and Atlanta finally notice the tears pouring from Jordan’s eyes. Atlanta grabbed Jordan’s hand, despite the dark red blood coating it and Jordan gripped it tightly. Alive on the outside and unbitten, but what the inside? Jordan’s pain… it ran deep - deeper than Atlanta realized earlier, but now, she knew just how hurt she truly was.
End of Chapter 2: “Among”
Next time...
"Jesus Christ..." A figure muttered in shock as he shined his flashlight on Christian. Much to Christian's amazement, he recognized the voice and a forced smile appeared on his face. "Hey, Jake." He muttered weakly.
Vincent stood over a dead body of a man, whose head was missing a chunk of flesh as she rested in the snow. He turned his attention to a well marked trail where the truck left tore up grass. He began walking in that direction, leaving the corpse behind him.
Lindsay and Keith stood in a office space with a shared shocked expression.
"You'll-- You'll pay... one way or other. And I'm not even a little sad I won't see it... or know... but it'll happen, and that's enough for me..."
Chapter 3: "Sin" - Coming soon
Woodkid - Where I Live
So, I'm probably going to start doing this at the end of each chapter.... I have several questions, but I'll try not to bombard you with too many
Who are your favorite characters and why?
Who are your least favorite characters and why?
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why?
What characters do you sympathize with and why?
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter?
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share?
Any questions you want to ask?
Amazing!
That last next time has to do with Zafir. No doubt in my mind.
Great chapter! I feel bad for Jordan now. And now I'm afraid of the next chapter!
Thanks, Quality!
You share the same feeling as your character
Thank you, InGen!
Huh? Zafir? Well... we haven't seen him in a long time...
Who are your favorite characters and why?
Well, overall it would still be Jerry and Josie for the same reasons I have mentioned the last time you asked. Right now my favourite is still Jerry, but with every part Josie is in the group again she starts to claim this position and I guess it won't be long until she is my undisputed favourite again. This does not mean I'll stop liking Jerry a lot, but of course I'll always be more biased towards Josie. However, neither of them appeared since last time you asked, so I think I should also mention that my favourite character in the last few parts was Atlanta. Last time you asked I also mentioned Jordan here, but her actions kind off prevent me from listing her among my favourite characters anymore. Time will tell if it stays that way, but for now I feel too conflicted about her.
Who are your least favorite characters and why?
Again, not much has changed. Zafir, Jake and Clarice for being assholes who enslaved the group. I'm still having the theory that Jake might be the third guy who kidnapped Josie and Lindsay, in which case he would easily be my least favourite character by far, actually I would hate him enough to make Zafir and Clarice look like saints next to him. In general I should maybe list the third guy who helped kidnapping Josie and Lindsay here. I mean, Jordan sort of redeemed herself and the other two guys are dead, but she mentioned a third guy, so one asshole is still out there, ready to pay. And no matter who it is, this person is probably truly my least favourite character.
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why?
Jordan, who is in fact the only character I have a mixed opinion on and I feel really conflicted about her. I like her character and I like her current actions, but her role in kidnapping Josie made me almost hate her enough to call for her death regardless. Her role in protecting Josie however caused me to be very conflicted about her. I don't hate her and I don't think I will, except if anything she told Atlanta was a lie of some sorts. But I also don't like her anymore in particular. However, I can only guess that part of my very conflicted view on Jordan is because she kidnapped Josie. If it would have been Ashley or only Lindsay, I assume I would be quicker to forgive, especially after the many good things she did. I'm curious how Josie will react to her once she finds out and how Jordan will react to Josie, especially since they had no interaction so far. I see two possibilities how this could go, either Josie forgives her, which would probably make me like Jordan a bit more too, or Josie will hate her for it, in which case I have to support her. However, I can't really see that, since Josie does not seem to be someone who holds grudges like that, especially considering what Jordan did to atone for it. I assume she will feel conflicted about her at worst, but will probably forgive her. Still, I'm looking forward to find out her thoughts about Jordan.
What characters do you sympathize with and why?
I admire Jerry's new outlook on how he views the group and sympathize with his protective instinct. Naturally I sympathize a lot with Josie and feel very sorry for the stuff that happened to her. However, she has some friends around who could help her, so I guess things could be worse for her. And I think Ashley is very likeable for the way she acts around Dan. Maybe I should admit that I slightly sympathize with Jordan. Her backstory is quite tragic and does wonders in making me sympathize with her.
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter?
This chapter was awesome and I enjoyed it a lot. It helped a great deal in understanding the character of Jordan and while I still resent her involvement in the kidnapping you also managed to prevent me from hating her. I liked it slightly less than Trauma for some reason I can't really grasp, but all in all I still loved it.
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share?
Always!
The people following the group are indeed the mall people and I can only guess that this means they are out for blood. The fact that Christian is happy to see this asshole Jake probably means that they save the group out of immediate danger though, probably by killing the rest of the walkers. However, nothing good will come out of the mall assholes interacting with the group again, I'm sure about that.
I guess Vincent will either get a storyline of his own, or he will follow Zayne in an attempt to rescue him.
Since Lindsay and Keith are looking for Lindsay's dad this could be a dad-related shocked expression. However, as far as I know shocked expression doesn't always need to be negative. Maybe they find her dad in a very unlikely place or moment. Or maybe something else happens and the shock is negative.
There are two possibilities I see here. One possibility would be Josie talking to Jordan and not forgiving her, but like I said above, that is not very likely. However, the second and much more likely possibility would be that this is a sentence uttered by Clarice. Since the mall assholes will interact with the Harvest Hills group again this could be Clarice talking to Jerry, swearing her revenge on him. Even though from my point Jerry was perfectly justified in killing Vincent, I think Clarice sees this from a slightly different angle. But then there is the choice of words here. Assuming it is Clarice, she says that she won't be around to see Jerry pay and won't even know it, which makes me think these are some sort of dying words from her. My speculation would be that she somehow makes sure that Jerry is going to die, or thinks that Jerry is as good as dead, but get's mortally wounded in the process, telling him these words with her final breath.
Any questions you want to ask?
Not right now, but maybe I'll find some questions later.
AWESOME CHAPTER!
But i need Dan development! You promised!
So it wasn´t Vincent , because i never submitted him
A very valid point, indeed
I have plans to end this 'storyline' very soon. I will only comment that the third kidnapper is a submitted character...
Pretty much. I also plan to included plenty of Vincent flashbacks so I can start revealing his backstory
Interesting theory... >.>
Again, I'm sorry I can't comment of too much of this, but I really appreciate the effort put into your answers. Let's hope a lot of this mysteries are answered within the story...
Thanks!
He'll develop more soon. It's pretty hard to give all the characters equal screen time, but I'm trying my best. You can expect more of him soon
You can always separate the characters and make a S2 with new characters ;P
This is going to be a very long story. I don't plan to make a season two. But I might expand it before I've reached the end, though I still have a very clear ending in mind.
Who are your favorite characters and why? Jerry. Handsome devil. Josephine is good too, Jerry X Josephine, JJ lol.
Who are your least favorite characters and why? Clarice, Zafir. Big assholes. Dicks, jerks, dolts, etc. I have no sympathy for them and gladly will kill them if given a good opportunity.
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why? Jordan. I really want to hate her. Like, to the extreme. She reminds me of Bonnie, walking the line between like or hate. Dean, although he wasn't my favorite character, is dead cause of her, but people escaped so yeah, I dunno.
What characters do you sympathize with and why? Josephine, cause she's still an emotional train wreck. Atlanta too, with the scenes with Jordan getting something from me.
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter? Pretty good. A little boring at times, and it's kind of hard to follow at times, I still love it though.
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share?
Yes:
Zafir or Clarice. Speaking to Jerry most likely. The person talking is bit, but they're trapped in someplace surrounded by walkers or something.
Shoot him.
Any questions you want to ask? Why did Keith and Lindsay go off on their own and not stay with the group to look for her father? Or was this explained and I forget
The shipping has began!
I'm glad you can put up with my sloppy writing. But I've diffidently been improving and I hope to continue to up my writing quality
It wasn't explained in great detail and I have to admit, I went about it the wrong way and should have followed the Harvest Hills group a little more after they left the mall. To explain it; Lindsay and Keith were a item before the apocalypse and broke up not long before it began. They've left the main group to look for Lindsay's father and Keith set out to help her find him. And that's about it. I know this didn't really answer your question, sorry, but that's all I can say at this time.
Who are your favorite characters and why? ASHLEY AND DAN BECAUSE BTW
Who are your least favorite characters and why? Duwww Jordan. SHE KILLED DEAN
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why? Jake because he was the nice in the mall but he is a douche in the next chapter thingy
What characters do you sympathize with and why? JOSEPHINE AND BECAUSE SHE IS JOSEPHINE
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter? It was cool , but i hate that when you get it off of Jerry you didn´t leave a single part of developement to Ashley.
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share? Jake coming back abd being a creep , Vincent rescuing Zayne , Lindsay and Keith fouding someone murdered brutally or her father and Clarice doing her thing
Any questions you want to ask? Do the bandits that attacked the Martinez are the same that attacked Zayne?
In due time, Sagig, in due time.
It hasn't been fully explained, but Zayne is in Colorado and about 2 months ahead of the Harvest Hills' current point of view. So they're about two states away and 2 months in the future, but I can completely confirm that aren't the same people.
So I just read the last 2 chapters
Who are your favorite characters and why?
Atlanta and she was my favorite since the first chapter, I don't know why it's just what I feel
Who are your least favorite characters and why?
Jordan... I don't like her! good intentions, she never wanted to do harm yada yada yada I ain't buying it
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why?
Jerry. I don't hate him but I also don't like him so much, he's a fine character and he had great development but I'm still not so sure about him
What characters do you sympathize with and why?
Atlanta. I really like the emotional stuff she's going through
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter?
Great chapter, it felt like a chore to read some of the parts but they were very few and for the most parts it was great and I really like it, really looking forward for the next episode
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share?
Oh, fuck
Cannibals? I think Vince will rescue Zayne again, I do like it that you write him as a sort of lone wolf type
I could speculate but it can be many people, it does seems like a someone's last words
the shipping has already long started but in secret
What are the current ships? XD
Jerry x Clarice. But at the start it was Jerry x Hate.
Also Josephine x Problems.
imighthavebrokenit ship director yes hello
Josie x Jerry
Ashley x Atlanta (duh)
And most to come
Just one of those characters that clicks for ya. I understand that.
Again, perfectly understandable. But I shall continue my mind games nonetheless!
Since he's not completely stable this makes sense.
I know what you mean. I'm gonna start trying to make parts more meaningful and entertaining. It's a little hard to do right now, but I'm gonna try to shy away from using filler.
Considering he was likely the one who tried to save Zayne in his last part, it's kind of obvious that he is going to do something about it. But again with the filler aspect, it would be quite boring to show him tracking him, so I plan to have a small mixer of that, Zayne's point of view, and flashbacks to start chipping away at Vincent's backstory!
Josephine x More Problems >.>
<.<
No, no, I'm not shipping that. I'm totally not shipping that. Josie and problems have basically no chemistry at all.
How about Josephine x No Problems? Wouldn't that be a nice ship? They have so much in common.
Or Josephine x Happy Ending? That's an OTP. They are practically meant for each other!
Monument x No Happy Endings. Now that sounds right considering how this is planned.
Considering you have some called 'Deny the End' it's safe to say I will deny it.
Planning ahead is SO fun. Form relationships, have great story arcs.....then BAM
I know it's great! Planning ahead is awesome, right now I have a lot planned out and more keeps being added
I never have an answer for the favorite characters question so I void that
Who are your least favorite characters and why? Jordan. I just don't trust her, I don't know why.
What characters do you have a mixed opinion on and why? Jerry. He's changed over the transition of act one and two.
What characters do you sympathize with and why? I don't really know for this one. Jordan and Christian have been put through a lot (then again everyone has) since the mall and have a pretty upsetting back story.
Thoughts, criticisms, and general view on this chapter? mmmmm nothing really
Any speculation on the preview you would like to share? mayb ok
Well we're told that the figure is Jake so I'm going on a limb (pun not intended) and going to say that Christian is close to fucked by the time Jake shows up. What really gets me tho is that he's weak and forcing a smile and with Jake now so he's either going to get help or die. Either way he's fucked. It also makes me wonder how Jake wound up in South Texas. Time will tell I guess.
So this is going to start the body count. This right here. Vincent is probably going after Zayne. Like 90% chance.
Which father will it be? Zafir or Gregory, only one knows.
I agree with Liquid. This might be Clarice to Jerry. Probably.
Any questions you want to ask? Not at the moment but I'll think of some later probably
Come to think of it... it's kind of smart that you don't reveal your favorite characters to me. If you did, i'd know what characters you wouldn't want to be killed... That doesn't mean I would kill characters that are loved, though, it kind of does.
I get this. She's not really the most trustworthy person with them, but that's mostly based on speculation, and hasn't done anything to hurt the group since she helped kidnap Josie and Lindsay. But even then she was tricked. Of course... people could think she's lying, which is also understandable. Though I think another character will be joining yours and many others least favorite slots... very soon...
I can see how his past actions in act one could sour one's opinion of Jerry, that and the fact that he's not completely stable. But he has come a long way from the asshole in the first three chapters.