OFFICIAL jokes and puns and also pick-up lines thread!
Welcome to the jokes and puns thread,where you can tell everyone your bad jokes and puns.Maybe you have good ones,idk.Have fun! 
EDIT:Now I want to know your pick up lines :P
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why did the chicken cross the road?
So Omid could run him over!
''why did the chicken cross the road?''
To get to Savanah?
His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police.
Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was.
As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in.
After fighting through many of the dealers' body-guards, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Foghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be..
As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Foghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more.
As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."
What does a bee use to brush its hair? A honeycomb! I'm so bad (;
I can't see it
Help me out here:
http://lolwtfcomics.blogspot.com/2012/07/hejibits-comic-youre-under-arrest-for.html
LOL his face!
Hey Lee....need a hand?
The dinner Lee's group had at the St. John's was reMARKable.
This forum is split 50/50 between people who like puns and people who hate them. It's safe to say we're a house divided.
In Harms Way is coming super soon.
"A moon rock tastes better than an earth rock because it's meteor."
Feel free to begin throwing rotten fruit. These were a new low even for me.
"I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went. Then it dawned on me."
-Ellie, The Last of Us
"What's a pirate's favorite letter? Tis the C!"
-Ellie, of that same game.
That was one of the most light hearted moments in the game, and a great pun.
"3.14% of sailors are Pi-Rates."
-Ellie, of.. well you know.
(Sticking with the pirate theme
)
It was perfect comedic relief. It was cute, and funny, and weird, and perfection
Why did the Governor change his name from Phillip to Brian? Brian only has one eye.
I bet Pete had cancer....
I...
am not good at puns.
Walks away from the computer
You're not good at puns? Then you're automatically funnier than those of us who are.
Like me.
Wow that's deep I never thought of it like that
It was unbeLEEvable what the St. John's did to prepare the meal though.
They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O
YES LAST OF US PUN take my thumb
Bout time you showed up friend!
They made a pun thread and the very first thing that came to my mind was Ellie's joke books
I Just got lucky!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lee
Clem: How did you survive you got bit and I shot you in the head
Lee: Just got Lucky
LARRY
Kenny: How do you survive i crushed your head with saltlick
Larry: I just got lucky
Kenny: WTF that's not even possible how have head
Larry: I SAID JUST GOT LUCKY!!!!
BEN
Clem: How did you survive you got pole through your stomach and got eaten by zombies with bullet in your head
Ben: I just got lucky
Clem: No we just got unlucky
DUCK
Kenny: What how did you survive you were zombie and got shot and how find us!!!
Duck: Just playing hide and seek
Kenny: What?
Duck: (insert reasonable excuse)
Kenny: WHAT!!!
Duck: Sorry mean just got lucky
Kenny: That's better now I get it
Do more later
"Clem: How did you survive you got pole through your stomach and got eaten by zombies with bullet in your head
Ben: I just got lucky
Clem: No we just got unlucky"
Oh my god! I can't stop laughing!
Thanks
Nice
These are horrible, guys. When this thread grows worse, I'll look Amid the Ruins.
lol thread
This thread has sadly got quiet. Seems I'm All That Remains.
I didn't want to post here but now there's No Going Back
"I'm inclined to be laid back."
-Ellie, they didn't spontaneously decide to change the game's name.
Visual pun time!
Hey, what do you call a zombie prostitute?
A street walker!
Huahehuahehuahe.