Monument to the Walking Dead: An Interactive Story (Ongoing)

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  • [Let Danny teach Josephine the basics of stitching a wound shut.]

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part One) Dogma The pain in Jake’s side threatened to make him break down and cry in the presence of Zafir. Jake didn’t w

  • [Let Danny teach Josephine the basics of stitching a wound shut.] This is an opportunity to learn something useful. While she also needs to talk to Atlanta about Jordan, she can always do that a bit later but she can only now learn how to stitch a wound shut.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part One) Dogma The pain in Jake’s side threatened to make him break down and cry in the presence of Zafir. Jake didn’t w

  • [Let Danny teach Josephine the basics of stitching a wound shut.]

    It's something you need to know. It will be very useful. And Yes! Ashley is alive! Yay!

    “From here on out, everything will be better."

    You're tempting fate dude. You are tempting it so hard right now.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part One) Dogma The pain in Jake’s side threatened to make him break down and cry in the presence of Zafir. Jake didn’t w

  • Closing the voting

    (!) Josephine will let Danny show her the basics of stitching a wound shut

    I'm not sure when I'll be on this. I recently put out a new part for Silicon in case of you are interested. Anyway, I haven't started the part so it's anyone's guess when it might come out. One thing I can say for sure is that it will come out sooner or later.

  • CHAPTER TEN (Part Two)

    Dogma

    Josephine Harper

    Josephine shook her head. Dead set. She pointed to the small box and started asking the first of a long string of questions. “So, how does this work?”

    Danny flipped opened the clip that kept the box firmly shut and laid the lid out behind it. “It’s simple really,” Danny said as he took out a clean, white piece of fabric and rolled it out to reveal several varieties of needles, scalpels, and other assorted things you would expect in a suturing kit. “Let’s start with the very basics…” He pulled out a box of disposable latex gloves and offered them to Josephine. He then put on a pair himself.

    Josephine tilted her head and narrowed her eyes slightly as Danny pulled out a lighter that seemed very out of place amid the kit. “What good will that do?” she asked.

    “Nothing. Well, what I mean is we won’t be using it for this. But since resources are limited, it can be a life saver. And while it definitely isn’t the go-to thing, if you’re in a dire situation and need to sterilize a needle, then hold it by the flame about an inch away. Not over it. Then wiped off and soot.” Danny returned it to the box and continued to demonstrate. He pulled out a bottle of rubbing alcohol that held about sixteen ounces. It seemed to be about half empty, initiated by Danny sloshing the liquid around in its bottle for a brief second. He bit his lip reluctantly before he continued. “It’s about time to really get started,” he said unenthusiastically.


    Jake Morrison

    Jake pushed open the tent flap so he could step inside. The canvas did little to block out the hustle of noises from outside. All around, the sounds of feet brushing through the dust and gravel could be heard, the occasional gunshot when one of the dead followed the sounds of the campsite being deconstructed. The thought of what he was being done was enough to make him shiver. A lie was made by him and it could all come crashing on top of him if he missed stepped.

    He now pushed sounds out of his mind, as he came into this tent with a clear reason. Zafir was ready to come clean to Maria about the nature of Christian’s dead. Given, even though there was not much that could have been done for him, and it was all but inevitable, Christian’s death still left an unpleasant stain on Jake’s mind. The thought of that night was always accompanied by a regretfully shudder. A remembrance of the screams within the campsite as one tent after another was torn down at random by the dead, the feeling of helplessness as their cried for help. That night was full of horrors that would stick with Jake for the rest of his life. In fact, he would make an effort to not forget.

    “Jake?” the voice of Maria greeted him with a confused undertone. “So, it’s true then, Jerry’s dead and we’ll be joining with what’s left of his group?” Maria shook her head while regretfully reminiscing. “And in Laredo of all places,” she scoffed.

    Jake stood silently at the entrance.

    “What is it?” she questioned worryingly.

    Jake bit his lip and shook his head frustratedly. “I’ve fucked up so much.”

    “Everyone majorly fucks up dozens of times,” Maria retorted while crossing her arms. “Just don’t fuck anymore and then everything’s better.”

    Jake cracked a small, grim smile and looked Maria in the eye. “That’s the thing,” he glumly began, “I think I might have started something. A chain of events. Leading to a whole lot fuck-ups down the road.”

    “Can’t be any worse than what’s already happened,” the young woman replied. She realized her face was hardened and she softened her expression considerably. “Besides, you can’t honestly think of a worse situation than what we’re already in?”

    “Could’ve been vampires,” Jake joked rather suddenly. “Werewolves,” he said, raised his hands and made claws of them mockingly. “So many more interesting things to choose from, yet some almighty being choose the army of darkness to plague us.”

    Maria rolled her eyes. She uncrossed her arms and thought better of playing along. Instead, she picked up on an underlying hint of actual fear in Jake’s voice. “Well, you seem distraught about more than just the variety of death available. Seriously, what’s up?”

    Jake pouted and painfully sat himself down in the tent, clenching his side as he lowered himself. “Jerry’s alive and I’m hiding him. That’s what’s up,” he whispered to Maria as she sat next to him. He was not sure what kind of reaction he would get from her. But she did not seem all that upset. In fact, the news was greeted by a somewhat pleased expression.

    “Sign me right the fuck up for the Jerry-squad then,” she hissed.

    “Do you not, I don’t know, understand the gravity of this situation?” Jake hissed back.

    Maria sighed, thinking better of her original statement. “Maybe not instantaneously…” she eyed the tent flap. “But I’m on board nonetheless. I’m not a fan of Zafir or his lot. Besides, Christian stood by Jerry. And I’m standing by Christian, even if he’s dead.”

    Maria’s glum expression from that point on solidified Jake’s original point to seeing her. “Then I’m about to hammer that opinion in stone—forever lasting,” Jake sighed reluctantly as he faced Maria directly, staring at her seriously “When I told you Christian died, I told that I was the one to make sure he didn’t come, all true. But there was more context I couldn’t tell you.”

    Maria’s face grew with worry. “What?” she questioned with a furrowed brow.

    “Zafir told Christian things, like some sort of a mental torture. He said that you would never know he was even here... That everyone of Jerry’s lot would all die.” Jake looked towards Maria with tears welling up in his eyes. “He expected me to do it. To keep that lie up.”

    “Sounds like you’re part of the hate club,” Maria remarked. She bit her lip. “Then why haven’t you done something about it? Why haven’t you killed him of something?”

    “You think I haven’t considered it?” Jake said with slight annoyance. “Why does everyone think I can just… kill him like that?”

    “Then why can’t you just leave? Forget all about all of this and leave this whole cancer of a group behind?” Maria questioned further.

    “It’s…” Jake gestured around the tent frustratedly. “Everyone here—they’re suffering. They aren’t the problem. They… They have a reason to want Jerry dead, but I doubt most of them would really act on it. I can still save them, if anything. It’s Zafir. He and Clarice are the extremist that would be willing to burn down an orphanage just to kill Jerry. But… I still can’t bring myself to give up on them either...”

    “So that’s it…” Maria murmured with a look of discovery building on her face. “You know what you’re doing, right?”

    “What might that be?” Jake mumbled as he massaged his forehead.

    “You’re desperately trying to cling onto every last one of them,” Maria explained. “The villains. The heroes. The commoners. All of them. That’s it. You can’t let anyone die. Period.”

    “Is that such a bad thing?” Jake muttered.

    “Of course it’s not,” Maria scoffed. “What makes it bad is if one of the few good guys left dies because of it. Now, just look at yourself. You’re bruised, battered the fuck up, I can tell from the quake in your damn voice. Keep this up, and you’ll be dead.” Maria’s face darkened with that statement and so did Jake’s.

    “I won’t die,” Jake murmured with his eyes painfully shut tight. “I just… won’t stop moving. I won’t stop until it’s safe. And they’ll have the world again. A future. I’ll pick up all the pieces, make something. It’s not too late to save the world.”

    “I don’t think that’s how it works. Now, and forgive me for saying this, but I doubt that’s possible anymore, even in a good state of health,” Maria commented.

    “You’ll be surprised by the cards I got up my sleeves,” Jake replied, halfheartedly forcing a smirk. “An unwillingness to give up will take me places.”

    “Yeah, straight into the ground.” Maria finally let out pent up sigh and waved a hand to Jake’s injuries. “Jesus, I’ve got a first aid kit, let me patch you up. You look like shit.”

    Jake, in turn, waved his hand dismissively. “It’s worse than that even. I’ve got broken ribs. Fucking hurts,” he muttered. “There’s nothing you can do. But there’s a doctor with the others. I think, maybe, he’ll be able to help.”

    Maria continued to the back of the tent where she began digging through a backpack. “I can’t make it worse, now can I?” When Jake replied with shrug, she rolled her eyes once again. “We won’t be leaving this place for a bit longer. Let me help.”

    [Allow Maria to help.]

    [Dismiss yourself from the tent.]

  • edited September 2015

    Orphanages and cancer. Finally, the right words to describe Zafir's lot.

    [Allow Maria to help.]

    What could possibly go wrong?

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part Two) Dogma Josephine Harper Josephine shook her head. Dead set. She pointed to the small box and started asking t

  • [Allow Maria to help.] why not.

    great chapter!

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part Two) Dogma Josephine Harper Josephine shook her head. Dead set. She pointed to the small box and started asking t

  • I see that Jake is still reluctant to dispose of Zafir and Clarice even though he admits that they are a problem and now I seriously start to wonder if he actually has an idea where this could possibly go. I mean, what are his long-term plans for the Jerry/Zafir-problem? And given how much on the edge Clarice is, I wouldn't even trust her not to harm Atlanta or even the completely innocent Josephine as a means to enact revenge on Jerry's group.

    [Allow Maria to help.]

    He is clearly wounded and while I doubt she can do mch about his ribs, she can hopefully treat some minor wounds, cuts and stuff like that. This is not a situation in which he should be too proud to accept help.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part Two) Dogma Josephine Harper Josephine shook her head. Dead set. She pointed to the small box and started asking t

  • [Allow Maria to help.]

    We're going to need lots of help.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part Two) Dogma Josephine Harper Josephine shook her head. Dead set. She pointed to the small box and started asking t

  • edited September 2015

    Voting is closed!

    (!) Jake will allow Maria to patch up some of the minor wounds

    Okay, so, I guess what I want to say is that these last two (going on three) parts haven't really been planned behind a basic premise. Like, seriously. This chapter might be one of the longest if I keep finding things for the characters to talk about. Like, all the choices this chapter have been diealoge related. But do not be fooled. It will contain much more action and violence than it has currently, in this same chapter. I'm actually kind of conflicted on one of the things that might be implied later in his chapter, I'm not going to include something super fucked up, but there's a possibility there might be something just fucked up nonetheless. So I have a question that you need not answer: where should the line be drawn and should it be drawn at all?

    Anyway, on a more chipper note, a new part will be going up soon after I post this. Sadly it won't have a choice since I'm cutting it short for my much-needed sleep. It's a substantial sized part nevertheless. I'll probably continue writing more on this chapter tomorrow, but as usual there's a chance it won't be out for awhile. Let's up it won't be too long though. Oh and I settled on the fifth act's title. Say hello to The Last Song, the name of which is based off one of the many songs called The Last Song. I wouldn't bother looking because it's a more lesser known one. It'll probably one of the many chapter finale themes, though.


    Alternate... timeline? Kinda

    While I once shared what the outcomes of the alternates choices would have been if chosen, it would be difficult to catch up with the earlier ones. So, I might do more of that in the future, but for now I wanted to share something else. A future that could have been if not for my long breaks here and there. Sadly I can't share everything, since I'm a recycler (>:D), but I wanted to explain what was going to happen originally.

    For starters, one thing isn't going to change. This chapter's end (or near end, for that matter) will take place at the river, Rio Grando, which makes up, like, almost of the border between Mexico and Texas. The one thing that as changed is the context. Obviously, I can't say what is going to happen, but I can tell you what was going to happen for a time. Let's begin with saying the group would not have come to its semi-peace. Now, the remaining Harvest Hills group would have been on the run still, forced across the river by a rapidly approaching Zafir and his group, hungry for revenge, and close behind them. Which is the pure reason for the chapter's original title "River Crossing."

    Chased into the water by them, the two groups would have learned the deadly secret the river held. WATER WALKERS. Kinda. Not exactly. It doesn't really make any sense when thinking back on it since rivers flow so there wouldn't be any walkers just sorta hanging out there. But that was the plan. Shit would have turned into bloodbath and people would have died. Jerry was planned to be assumed dead and disappear for quite some time. Zafir was going to save Josephine from a watery death to redeem him slightly so he wasn't as repulsive and hated. And people would have died. That's about it honestly. It would have been rushed and weird like the third chapter. It would have been supercalifragilisticexpialidociously messy.

    And that has been storytime with the person killing your beloved characters. Goodnight. Sleep tight. And don't let impossible walker-situations... bite?

  • CHAPTER TEN (Part 3)

    Dogma

    Jake Morrison

    Jake waved his hand, one part dismissive and another part carelessness. He allowed Maria to kneel in front of him as she inspected one of the many flesh wounds Jake had sustained in the motorcycle crash. A particularly nasty gash—open and glistening with congealing blood—on his forehead was her first target of care. She dabbed it with some cloth and frowned unpleasantly as she wiped off the thickening of blood to clean it.

    “You know,” she began while continuing to dab his forehead, “I grew up here in Laredo. It’s strange being so close to my home. I still recall the names of people who owned shops around town, it’s odd knowing that they’ve all likely died. But what could be done? Honestly. People die. We just don’t like dying. But when you’ve got a rabid dog, you have put it down to keep it from hurting others and itself…”

    That final sentence sparked something in Jake’s eyes. A painful denial and frustration. “You don’t old yeller human beings, Maria. Zafir’s human. The way I see it, that’s all we’ve got left.” Jake licked his dry lips and strengthened his weak demeanor. “I’m not saying times haven't changed—they’ve changed a lot and we’ve got to take a lot of drastic measures. But when someone is sick, you help them get better. I think with Jerry currently out of the picture whatever has happened to Zafir can be treatable.”

    “Some things aren’t treatable, though. Mental illness especially. You know what happened. When Melissa and Mina died in such a way as they did,” Maria found her upper lip curling with reminded disgust before she could shake the expression and continue, “just like that, whatever humanity left within Zafir vanished. That snapped the branch and the fire Jerry started broke it clean from the tree. That’s why Keith left when he did.”

    “I guess I’m the only one who can still see a glimmer of humanity left,” he mumbled. Jake fell silent after that statement. He let Maria continue to a different stage of cleaning the wound. Jake and Maria snapped to look towards the tent flip when a particularly close gunshot went off. “That was closer than before,” Jake noted. “They’ll start going off more often in a while. Who knows how far away the horde as wandered. It could return with a vengeance.”

    “You’re the survivor expert apparently. How would say we’d deal with that before all hell breaks loose again?” Maria questioned, only paying half-attention as she began applying a bandage to his forehead.

    “If the sounds of gunshots draw them closer…” Jake bit his lip in thought, “we’ll just have to draw them away with the same method. We’ll send a guy back north on one of the ATVs we’ve got with us. Have them draw off the dead in that direction just to be sure nothing gets us.” Another shot went off outside and Jake cursed under his breath as he painfully stood with his hand applying gentle pressure to his side. “I gotta stop them from firing more shots before something bad happens.”

    Jake stopped and faced Maria with one leg already out of the tent. Her arms were crossed disappointedly. “Please, for the love of good old, hateful god, don’t push yourself. And I hope you’ve got a good plan. Because these lies you’re spreading, they’re fragile.”

    Jake nodded. “I know,” he replied with a calming seriousness to his voice. “And thank you, Maria. It means a lot to know you’re still with me.”

    Maria flashed a reluctant smile and watched glumly as Jake left the tent completely. “Don’t die on me, asshole,” she murmured jokingly to herself as she returned to start packing her things for the move.


    Josephine Harper

    “So, here’s what basically happened,” Danny said to Josephine as he removed his gloves. “Both the Mexican and American sides of the border got significantly fucked up in the first week. The original safe-zone founded in Laredo was wiped out by the dead at some point, I don’t know when for sure since I stayed out of it. But since it fell, a second one across the border was established after cannibalizing the assets of the old one. Calvin and I kept in better contact with this one. Sadly… it too fell dark. The herd you ran into was pretty much the infestation of the dead here and across. Thankfully, there're only a few hundred stragglers that are keeping a fair distance apart. But I was thinking,” Danny leaned in closer to retain some level of secrecy, “maybe we could eye up what’s left of the Nuevo Laredo safe-zone. It’s partially overrun, though. When your group’s ready to move on, it might be your best bet to attempt to reclaim it.”

    Josephine nodded, thoughtfully considering it. “It sounds too good to be true,” she commented. “You said it’s partly overrun, but how hard would it be to take it back?”

    Danny shrugged. “It would take a good amount of firepower and some serious stamina, but I doubt it would be impossible. Time consuming, yes. Possibly deadly, yeah. But impossible? No way.”

    Josephine continued nodding as she looked over the sleeping Jerry. “I’ll mention it to everyone else once I tell them the situation Jake has put us in.” She bit her lip and looked at Danny considerately. “I don’t think I’ve gotta your opinion on it yet.”

    “The way I see it, bad people are bad people, and this Zafir guy sounds like he’s on the morally black side of things. I also hear the reason they want Jerry is a little complicated, isn’t that right? I take it that’s in the gray area.” Danny frowned and shook his head. “But as long as they don’t cause any trouble with Calvin, I’ll keep quiet about their presence. And secrets are meant to be kept if you’re entrusted with them, so you don’t have to worry about me tattling.”

    “Thank you,” Josephine said sincerely. She held a betrayed demeanor in her position as she diverted her vision from both Danny and Jerry. “There’s something I’ve been so fucking confused about recently,” Josephine admitted softly to him.

    “What is it?” Danny asked in a calming tone.

    “A friend of mine died at your farmhouse during the whole thing. She was executed by this man Zafir because she came with us left his group. But there was something she said, something that she confessed before she died…” Josephine paused and shivered unnoticeably. “I don’t know what to think of her. Sh-She hurt me, and a friend, and I had no clue. She must have felt bad about it. Thinking back, I can see the guilt in her eyes, it was painted on her face…”

    Danny bit his lip and reached out his hand to supposedly pat Josephine on the back reassuringly, but thought better of it and made an awkward hand gesture to hid it. “Uh-huh, well, that’s pretty messed up. I don’t know what to say, and I don’t want to make any hurtful assumption, but if she was sorry, and she meant it, I’d think that’d mean she valued you.”

    “I guess so,” Josephine mumbled as she massaged her elbow, not convinced personally of what Danny suggested. “Anyway, I won’t ever get to know the sincerity of how she felt, so I might as well just forget about it completely. It’ll be just another bad memory either way.”

    “While I agree with you, you shouldn’t obsess over it either way, that’d be unhealthy, but you don’t know if there’s another person who might know what happened in full?” Danny questioned in an attempt to help Josephine find solace.

    Josephine shook her head slowly. “There aren’t any I know of,” she glumly replied.

    “Then, I suppose, it’s best to move on,” Danny sighed regretfully. He nodded slightly to announce his departure as he started walking upstairs and left Josephine alone in the basement with Jerry’s unconscious body. She eyed the two bags hanging on the rack that lead to his arm. She took a long breath and then started hiking up the stairs, ready to gather everyone and tell them the situation.

    To be continued....

  • Danny's a psychic, Jake's too kindhearted to put down a rabid dog, and Zafir is Old Yeller, all basically confirmed.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 3) Dogma Jake Morrison Jake waved his hand, one part dismissive and another part carelessness. He allowed Maria t

  • Josephine shook her head slowly. “There aren’t any I know of,” she glumly replied.

    Well, there's one that I know of. I think.

    Great part!

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 3) Dogma Jake Morrison Jake waved his hand, one part dismissive and another part carelessness. He allowed Maria t

  • Hype rising.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 3) Dogma Jake Morrison Jake waved his hand, one part dismissive and another part carelessness. He allowed Maria t

  • edited September 2015

    I'm actually kind of conflicted on one of the things that might be implied later in his chapter, I'm not going to include something super fucked up, but there's a possibility there might be something just fucked up nonetheless.

    I hope it is not what I fear I might be. Though, I fear something super fucked up, so it's probably not that. But fucked up never sounds good and makes me very nervous.

    WATER WALKERS.

    This can't be worse than White Walkers, right? It sounded like a cool idea for sure, although I think from a logical point of view it made little sense. Perhaps it's for the better that you dropped that idea, as interesting as it would have been.

    Zafir was going to save Josephine from a watery death to redeem him slightly so he wasn't as repulsive and hated.

    So, Josie would have survived the chapter? That sounds good and I hope that will be one of the things that won't change. Naturally, I am still worried as always. Though, I would have been very conflicted about Zafir after such an act. I mean, part of me does not want to forgive him, but I would have had a seriously hard time hating him as much as I do right now afterwards.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    Voting is closed! (!) Jake will allow Maria to patch up some of the minor wounds Okay, so, I guess what I want to say is that these la

  • edited September 2015

    I have a bad feeling for Jake's plan. Zafir and Clarice are bound to make some trouble and they really have to die for the group to be safe. His refusal to kill the bad guys is endangering the good guys, him and Jerry first and foremost. Perhaps Zafir can indeed be cured, but in the long run Jerry can't stay in Calvin's basement forever, so it does not look as if Jake has thought this through. Not that I blame him, he has few other alternatives, aside from outright killing Zafir and Clarice (which might be for the best for everyone) I really like Maria though. I was already a bit hyped for her character to appear in the story for real and so far she has not disappointed.

    And naturally I loved the Josephine part as well. Danny is a good addition to the group and I liked his buddy-talk with Josie. While I got a bad feeling for her situation with some bastards whom I don't want to name coughTrevorandVioletcough, at least the Jordan situation looks like it's about to be resolved. Atlanta knows Jordan's side of the story after all and now they only need to find the time to talk about it. Although, at the moment I can totally understand if Atlanta has more important things to worry about, considering that Ashley nearly died. But it was certainly interesting to learn about Josie's view on the topic, and interestingly it greatly mirrored my own views. I'm glad that she at least seems to consider forgiving Jordan.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 3) Dogma Jake Morrison Jake waved his hand, one part dismissive and another part carelessness. He allowed Maria t

  • CHAPTER TEN (Part 4)

    Dogma

    Jake Morrison

    Jake’s elbow rested outside the window of the truck, he was seated in the passenger’s seat. He stared blankly at the rolling plains. Dry, yellowish-brown landscapes. Behind the leading vehicle Jake rode in was a trail of other cars and trucks. A large convoy with roughly thirty people participating in the long ride back towards Laredo. Besides the gruff hum of the tires’ treads rubbing against the asphalt, it was deathly quiet. No conversations were in motion within the lead truck, and it was unknown if the silent atmosphere trailed with them. The driver was once again Zafir. Perhaps the reason for the stillness was the others in the back seat, Jake being uncomfortable discussing matters that he had originally talked to Zafir about.

    The indecisive look Zafir occasionally flashed him made his pulse speed up nervously. His nervousness would have been self-explanatory to anyone who knew the situation he built around himself. Zafir, ready to murder Jake, was only swayed by the single prospect that with Jerry gone he finally could move on. But secretly, Jerry lived. If he found out, and Jake was nearby at the time, he too would be on the blunt end of Zafir’s reawakened rage and desire for revenge, and even if he was not presence, he guessed Zafir would hunt him down.

    “That the place?” a deep male voice sounded from the back seat. He leaned into the front seat with his hands placed on the chairs, supporting his weight and keeping him from stumbling forward when the truck slowed down suddenly and started inching towards the curbless roadside.

    Jake replied with a firm nod as he pushed open his door and signaled the others in the far back of the convoy to hold up by rising his hand. He walked solely towards the house with an increasingly stressful expression that echoed infinitely in his hazel eyes. The long drive way was not long enough, or too long entirely. Each step echoed the crackling laugh of gravel beneath his shoes. Entering the yard, he found some brief comfort in the cool shade the giant tree provided. The tapping of his steps as he climbed onto the porch sounded, followed by the similar echo of him knocking on the front door.

    Its hinges creaked and a face peered through the crack of the open door. “Jake, I expect,” the voice of the man said. As the door opened fully, Jake got his first good look at the doctor, owner of the house, Calvin McGee. He was a short man compared to Jake. The man’s hair was a faded brown that was graying considerably. Winkles reminiscent of laugh lines laid inactively on his face. Strangely unshocking, his clothes were bloodstained. He looked rather disgruntled at the first slight of the convoy. Somewhat angry, but not at Jake, the man asked with a dry tone, “What exactly is going to happen now?”

    Jake sympathetically frowned, turned and point to the road. “They won’t come any closer and they won’t intrude on your property,” Jake explained first to quell the man’s poorly hidden discomfort. It did the thick and Calvin’s expression softened. “Now, I suppose I should ask if there’s a good spot for them to set up camp. Any clear areas with shade?”

    Calvin nodded slowly. “Down the road a spell is a another house with a big open yard with plenty of shade. It should do the thick,” Calvin answered. He eyed the convoy once more and leaned in closer to Jake to tell him something. “Your injured guys have been doing nicely. Ashley’s awake and with Atlanta. Tired as all hell, though.”

    Jake forced a smile and nodded understandingly. “Sounds good.” Jake faced the group of trucks and assorted vehicles again and then returned to Calvin. “I need to tell them where to get set up. I was also hoping you would be able to have a look at me. I crashed on a motorcycle and think I’ve got at least one broken rib that I’ve been fighting.”

    “Yes, of course,” Calvin replied without hesitation. “You see to them and I’ll see to you when you return.”

    “I won’t be too long,” Jake said as he started back down the steps, he quietly grunted under his breath with each step, due to the pain the bouncing motion distilled in his side. He walked through the gravel path and passed over the dried, crunching grass on his way back to the truck. After finally arriving, finding one of the other men had commandeered his seat during his absence, he pointed down the road for Zafir to see. “Down the road,” he said breathlessly. “Large yard and a lot of shade. Start setting up camp there.”

    “Are you coming?” Zafir asked a little impatiently.

    Jake shook his head. “No,” he replied.

    “Should I send someone for you, then?” Zafir questioned.

    “The doctor is going to have a look at me, so I might be here for awhile. I’ll make my way to you when the time comes. Just set up the campsite without me and remember, remind everyone, no guns.” Jake patted the open window once and back up off the road so the truck could pull ahead. The rest of the convoy followed after a momentary pause and soon they were on their way. Jake left the area quicker than he had approached because of the dust being thrown into the air.

    Arriving once again at the white porch, Calvin gave Jake a questioning look. “So?” he asked vaguely.

    “They’ll be out of our hair for some time. I’d still keep a lookout for stragglers, though, if I were you,” Jake advised as the doctor escorted him inside the house. Besides all of the blood that appeared to have dripped on the living floor, coffee table and sofa, plus some discarded bandages and cloth, it seemed like a nice interior. It was well kept compared to the state of just about every other house in the America.

    “Have a seat right there,” he directed him, pointing to the clean loveseat by the window.

    Jake sat himself down and adjusted his posture to lessen the discomfort of his side. He raised his shirt to allow the soft, natural light illuminate a deeply red spot on his side. Jake cringed while looking at it and raised an eyebrow towards Calvin to see what he thought.

    “Well…” Calvin mumbled. He pointed to the bruise, looking for permission to touch it, and Jake nodded in grim agreeance. He felt it gently, unfortunately for Jake, however softly he pressed, it still hurt incredibly. “Does it just hurt when you breath?” he asked.

    “Yes, but also when I walk, especially stairs,” Jake answered. “Is it broken or just bruised badly?” he asked.

    “It’s hard to tell without x-rays. Fortunately, the treatment for a fractured rib and bruised one are similar. Since it doesn’t appear to be causing harm to your lungs or other organs, you’ll just have to rest a lot for the next four or five weeks to allow it to heal,” Calvin explained with a slow, calm tone. “Now, as much as it may hurt to inhale, try not to let your breaths be too shallow. I have some painkillers you can take to minimize the pain.”

    Jake cracked a small, appreciative smile and climbed out of the chair. “Is there a good place to rest up around here?” he asked respectively as he looked around the place a little more.

    “Yes,” Calvin said immediately, “there are two spare bedrooms upstairs. Ashley, Atlanta and Daniel have taken up the first to the left when you reach the top of the stairs. You might want to check up on them. You can lay down in the room to the right of the stairs.”

    Jake nodded as he took several steps towards the visible stairs at the far end of the living room. However, he passed and looked back at the doctor. “Where have got Jerry set up?” he asked secretively.

    “In the basement. Past the stairs and to the left,” Calvin responded. “The door is locked from the inside by Josephine. She and Danny have been keeping an eye on him, but right now Danny has gone to his house to help cover up the lie some more.” He tilted his head and scratched his neck before continuing. “Everyone knows the drill, if know what I’m saying.”

    Jake gravely sighed and looked upstairs. “When will Danny be back?” he asked.

    “He went to bury the woman who was killed and make a second, fake grave for Jerry. He’s been gone for awhile, so I’d imagine he could be back anytime now,” Calvin replied. “We’re working hard to keep up this lie of yours.”

    “Thank you for that,” Jake said sincerely.

    Finishing his conversation and check-up with Calvin, Jake was handed a small bottle of painkillers and sent upstairs to rest. He steadily climbed the stairs, careful to avoid putting stress on himself. He opened the door and stepped into the small room he had to himself. Or so he thought. Upon entering he noticed a small orange animal sturry under the bed.

    “Come out little guy,” Jake murmured to what he knew was a cat. He painfully lowered himself on to one knee to take a look at the feline. A pair of wide green eyes stared back at him from under the bed frame. After a minute of clicking his tongue and trying to lure the timid cat out, Jake gave up and resigned himself to the sofa mattress. Jake sat there for several seconds before he produced the bottle of painkillers from his pocket. He siphoned a single pill from the plastic bottle and swallowed it whole. Sighing as he settled himself in the bed, he pushed one shoe off with the other and laid in the bed, attempting to get comfortable.

    Jake’s eyes wandered around the room. It was empty except for the bare necessities; a dressed bed, dresser and nightstand. There was also a closest on the far wall. Within the room was a deadly stillness that he could not get over. To his right, however, was a window that looked out upon the another house in the blurred distance. Jake regretfully climbed out of bed and stepped towards the closed, glass window to get a better look at the house roughly a couple hundred yards away.

    The yard was alive. Amidst the darkening landscape, lanterns were starting to be lit to illuminate their area. Several people had already started pulling the tents from the pickup truck’s bed. It would be a dozen more minutes before that one tent would be set up. But with the multitude of hands working to rebuild the campsite at its new location, there would be dozens of tents set up in those slim few minutes.

    That was it. That was how it would be possible. Unity was one of the many things necessary to rebuild the world. It would start soon. And Jake hoped somewhere someone was trying to do the same thing.

    To be continued... again...

  • edited September 2015

    Sorry. Kinda. Not really. It's not a bad thing.

    I'm kind of sorry about the lack of choice for the second time. I haven't reached a point where I can have a meaningful choice since I'd like to cut back on the more useless ones for now. Also have noticed the severe lack of walkers in the last two or three chapters. That'll change as well. Anyway, I'll see you around when I have another part. Seeya!

  • edited September 2015

    First of all, the updated main post looks pretty neat! What software are you using to create these little banners for the different acts?

    As for this part, Jake's plan starts to get more precise. It looks like he indeed plans to leave Jerry in Calvin's basement for now, although he does not plan to abandon him. I am still pretty sure that this can not end well, with Zafir and Clarice so close to him, but it might work for a while and it sounds better than to leave him behind for good. There's also that bastard Trevor, who knows that Jerry is alive and has no loyalty towards Jake or Jerry at all. Even worse, from what we know he is still loyal towards Zafir, as he never officially abandoned him like Violet did. Not that it makes Violet any better, but at least she is not acting as obnoxiously jerkish as her murderous asshole of a brother. That's yet another reason to kill him, since he definitely sounds like someone who would destroy Jake's plan just for the evulz. Writing this, I am more and more surprised why the group even allows him to stay near them, given how obviously evil and untrustworthy he is. Are they all completely stupid for tolerating one of Zafir's men near them, especially one who never even bothered to promise that he'll keep Jerry a secret? All they need to do is to put a bullet into his creepy head and Josie and Jerry can be safe again.

    Also, I really hope I am interpreting too much into this, but the last time we saw Josie, she was about to go upstairs to gather the others, while now she apparently locked herself in the basement, with the evil fucks, Trevor and Violet, being suspiciously absent as well. Hopefully I am just paranoid, as apparently there has been a small time skip between her going upstairs and Jake returning to Calvin's house, but the thought that Trevor and probably Violet might do something to Josie while the rest of the group is completely clueless is very concerning to me. But regardless of what these horrible siblings are up to at the moment, the group needs to kill them as soon as possible, or else Jake's plan is doomed to fail for sure and Josie is almost certainly in for a horrible fate.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 4) Dogma Jake Morrison Jake’s elbow rested outside the window of the truck, he was seated in the passenger’s seat

  • I'm using a free online editor called Pixlr: Express to make them. I started with a shock image of a brick wall and layered different effects until it reached the pattern.

    Their reason for keeping Trevor and by extension Violet are pretty simple but have yet to be established. Trevor (and even Violet) could easily spill the beans on Jerry's liveliness. That's why they're keeping him on short leash and most importantly away from Zafir. Besides, about two months in, nobody's ready to start executing people.

    Yet...

    First of all, the updated main post looks pretty neat! What software are you using to create these little banners for the different acts?

  • edited September 2015

    I'm using a free online editor called Pixlr: Express to make them. I started with a shock image of a brick wall and layered different effects until it reached the pattern.

    I see, didn't know that one until now. I looked into it and it looks refreshingly competent for a free software. Perhaps I'll have some use for it :D

    Their reason for keeping Trevor and by extension Violet are pretty simple but have yet to be established. Trevor (and even Violet) could easily spill the beans on Jerry's liveliness. That's why they're keeping him on short leash and most importantly away from Zafir.

    So, they have reasons to keep them around aside from inappropriate morality? That's interesting to know. Objectively though, I can fully understand why they keep Violet and I don't hold it against the group. After all, she abandoned Zafir by her own choice when the moment came, which makes me doubt that she is going to betray the group for him. Really, the only reason why I hate her even more than Zafir at the moment is that she is Trevor's sister and an obstacle when it comes to giving him what he deserves before he can do even more damage. Trevor on the other hand is a completely different case. The whole messed-up kidnapper thing and the worse than a zombie-Hitler/Zafir hybrid thing aside, he never really cut ties Zafir, so I am curious how exactly they plan to keep him on short leash. If they don't lock him up somewhere safe, there is little they can do to keep him away from Zafir forever, aside from the permanent solution. Now that I think about it, Jake's plan has a few big weak spots, Trevor and Violet being the most prominent, but not the only ones. The group really should just shoot them and claim self defense, which in Trevor's case wouldn't even be too far away from the truth.

    Besides, about two months in, nobody's ready to start executing people.

    Well, I certainly can't think of two characters who would deserve death more than Trevor and Violet at the moment. Besides, Zafir already executed Jordan not long ago. Though I have to admit that Zafir is not the best role model for the apocalypse, to put it mildly. I also have the feeling that, no matter how much time passed since the start of the apocalypse, Josephine would probably be more than happy to kill Trevor, should she learn what he did.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    I'm using a free online editor called Pixlr: Express to make them. I started with a shock image of a brick wall and layered different effect

  • Great part once again! I honestly fear what will happen if Zafir discovers that Jerry is alive.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 4) Dogma Jake Morrison Jake’s elbow rested outside the window of the truck, he was seated in the passenger’s seat

  • Awesome part!

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 4) Dogma Jake Morrison Jake’s elbow rested outside the window of the truck, he was seated in the passenger’s seat

  • Update of sorts:

    Recently I've been planning further up the timeline all the way to the first chapter of act four. More of act three is being planned and chapter eleven is completely planned out. Now it's just a matter of finishing up this current chapter and we'll be on our way. But speaking of which, Dogma has been mauling over a singular topic for far too long, so it's going to heat up next time part five is out (I haven't begun it yet, so when is anyone's guess). Now that brings me to another topic, which is the points of views. If I remember right it went from Anthony>Jerry>Jordan>Josephine and Jake. It just gets handed off to the next guy. I'm hoping to change this trend starting with act three, which will return to a hub location so the characters aren't all bunched together all of the time, so we can get more points of views without their stories growing too similar and crowded by the same events. So, (if they live through this chapter) characters like Jerry, Jake, and Josephine, along with others will be continuing their sperate developments without canceling each other out. What you can suspect from act three: more points of view, consequences from previous choices (you messed up. Yes, you), a more realistic atmosphere, and more realistic medical recovery. A lot more things are going to be definite, sadly so. A few things already are.

    Well, I'm going to stop planning for a bit and start working on the next part soon. There's a lot to cover in the remaining few parts of this chapter. A lot of set-up for future events, too. Things are going to take an expected turn while also being completely unexpected, hence why I had to keep the eleventh chapter's title a secret, along with the last chapter of that act. So, I'm going to reveal a few things here and put them in the main post as soon as possible. For starters: chapter twelve is called "Blissful Among the Scary Things," chapter thirteen is called "Murderer," which isn't as inherent as you might expect, fourteen is called "Martyr," and the fifteenth chapter is also a secret.

    Lastly, the act titles are meaningful but abstract at the same time. "The Gateway Dream" is probably the most abstract of them all since it referenced the gated community while also making the notion it was just a gateway, so think gateway drug (which is a softer drug that eventually brings on hardcore drugs) but with morals (?) or something, it's been a while since I came up with it. "A Marching Band" simple referenced the fact they were traveling. "By Those Beyond" is still coming, but it'll make sense when the time comes. It's actually an abbreviated sentience. It would be pretty easy to figure out if I revealed the fifteenth chapter title. Then there's "In Kingdom Come" which is, like, a city you can enter but never leave, so that's probably self-explanatory. Finally, we have "The Last Song," which is just based on a song with a similar name.

    So after everything I have told you, I'd like to thank you all again for submitting characters and taking the time out of your day to read and participate in the voting. It means a lot. I hope this story lasts to the end. Obviously things can go awry in between now and then, but I'm looking forward to seeing this come full circle. So far it's been great and I hope it keeps going uphill from here.


    So, I know this has been Liquid's thing, but there's a good few people who read Monument and I'd like to share a story on this forum by another user. The story in question is called Venatore by Mathea. It's extremely well-written, but it looks to be in need of some characters. I don't want to speak for the author, so here's a quote from the main post:

    The world story will be taking place in, is present world where darkness exists hidden away from humanity. Only rare group of people realize and know that there is not only them but as well much stronger and mystical creatures walking amongst them. Those supernatural beings can be a friend of foe, depending on their classification and personality. There is a secret worldwide organization formed to keep track on them and make them invisible for the rest of the world.

    You are just a human, which is aware or not yet of their existence. Choice is yours in this matter. You want to be a member of the organization or soon to become one? You cannot create supernatural character – but you can become one while story goes on. Decision will be up to me though. (Buuuu, it sucks! No boundaries, Mathea!)

  • But speaking of which, Dogma has been mauling over a singular topic for far too long, so it's going to heat up next time part five is out

    Uh-oh... Things heating up is never a good thing. Considering that Zafir seems appeased for now, I am afraid this can only mean that Trevor finally makes his much-dreaded move. Considering my speculation, he might already made his move by the time Jake and Calvin have been talking in the last part. And there are only two (or perhaps three) ways I can see that one ending.

    If I remember right it went from Anthony>Jerry>Jordan>Josephine and Jake.

    You forgot Atlanta, who had major parts all over the story, together with Anthony and Jerry in Act 1 and together with Jordan, Christian and Jerry in the first half of Act 2. In general, there have always been several PoV's at the same time for most of the story, with pretty much every main group member having a PoV in the first half of Act 1 and the first half of Act 2. The way I see it, you do a good job with switching between the PoV's, although in my opinion this system has been the best in the first half of Act 1, where you managed to give almost every character involved their own PoV parts. A new hub location sounds exciting and I assume it will be a good opportunity for the PoV characters to spread out without interfering with each others storyline too much, a bit like it has been in Harvest Hills. Wait... does that mean that a new community is confirmed?

    So, (if they live through this chapter) characters like Jerry, Jake, and Josephine, along with others will be continuing their sperate developments without canceling each other out.

    Fingers crossed for Josie's survival. She has not come this far and through all this shit just to die here, I hope. That girl is pretty much a living bad luck magnet by now, so a bit of good luck would be a welcome, if unlikely change. I highly assume that Jerry is going to be safe, until he meets up with Sasha at least. Having a general idea about how Sasha is, I guess he won't be safe in any way after being reunited with her. In fact, she sounds a lot more dangerous to him than the piece of metal in his brain. I can see Jake potentially going both ways. His plan is doomed to fail in my opinion, but that does not mean that he won't manage to escape from the wrath of the Zafir. In any way, should these three survive, I am excited for what future development they may have.

    What you can suspect from act three: more points of view, consequences from previous choices (you messed up. Yes, you), a more realistic atmosphere, and more realistic medical recovery. A lot more things are going to be definite, sadly so. A few things already are.

    Wait... I messed up? I have to say, I really regret that the group went to Laredo, as it brought Trevor, the sociopathic, Josie-kidnapping, piece-of-shit rapist-timebomb to them, while also bringing Zafir closer to Jerry. Honestly, the Jerry situation would have been no problem if the group would have decided to head back for San Antonio. As for the choices in Chapter 4 and 5, I can't really see where I (or we in general) messed up, though in retrospect I have a bad feeling about the last Josie choice. Of course, I always have a bad feeling about every Josie choice, but thinking about it, this just looked so much like the good decision in this situation, that, by experience, it can't be the good decision. The things you mention that are sadly already set in stone do not sound good, not at all, and they make me really worried. I hope it's not what I fear it is. And what I fear is... well, really, really bad and really, really messed up.

    Things are going to take an expected turn while also being completely unexpected, hence why I had to keep the eleventh chapter's title a secret, along with the last chapter of that act.

    Wait... this does not sound good. The expected turn that is unexpected at the same time, I mean. I expect things to go down, Zafir to somehow learn about Jerry and especially Trevor to try and get his stinking hands on Josie. While I hope that it can be avoided, preferrably by dousing him and his worthless bitch of a sister in gasoline and shooting fireworks at them until they become the firework, part of me fears that we already managed to screw this up in some way. Now... the unexpected turn is what worries and confuses me to no end. While part of me already fears the worst case scenario for the Trevor situation, it is the unexpected thing that gives me a bad vibe. Since I partially expect the worst case for pretty much every situation, one might think it has to be something good if something unexpected happens, right? However, knowing Monument, it is probably not good and that is a bad thing. I can't imagine anything unexpected that makes the situation even worse than I already expect it to get, but I have no doubt that you'll find something. At least that fucking sociopath Trevor is capable of anything in my eyes and I wouldn't be too surprised if Violet is just like him, so I guess the unexpected turn will revolve around the Zafir situation or the coming walker threat you hinted at.

    For starters: chapter twelve is called "Blissful Among the Scary Things," chapter thirteen is called "Murderer," which isn't as inherent as you might expect, fourteen is called "Martyr,"

    Blissful Among The Scary Things sounds a bit calmer than the rest, which makes me think it might be a trap. If Murderer isn't as inherent as I would expect, I guess it could be about a sympathetic murderer. You know, like someone who kills pieces of trash like Trevor and Violet, but for some unexplainable reason still feels bad about it. Maybe Jake will be forced to kill someone, despite his high morals. Martyr on the other hand sounds dark and I expect someone sacrificing themselves for the group, or suffering in some other way for the sake of others.

    "By Those Beyond" is still coming, but it'll make sense when the time comes. It's actually an abbreviated sentience.

    I have always suspected this. For me as a non-native speaker, especially one with mediocre grammar, this combination of words made little sense so far, but I guess the fifteenth chapter title will contain the rest of this sentence, or even the full sentence. The only question is, beyond what? Anyway, it does not sound very hopeful. I'm noticing a pattern in my speculation.

    So after everything I have told you, I'd like to thank you all again for submitting characters and taking the time out of your day to read and participate in the voting. It means a lot.

    And well, I fear I repeat myself, but thank you for writing this story. Aside from all the seizures and strokes I got from all of these heartwrenching twists and turns, it has been a pleasure to read every single part so far and it is without a doubt my favourite story in the forum. In fact, as you can see by the length of my usual speculation, I just love speculating about the story, in a way that reminds me of the way I usually only like to speculate about very good books or tv shows, so that alone is already enough to make this story amazing. With great fear in my heart, I can say that I can't wait for the next parts :D

    So, I know this has been Liquid's thing,

    I knew I should have claimed a copyright on shout-outs, I could have been filthy rich by now XD Coincidentally, I am writing two characters for Venatore just as we're talking.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    Update of sorts: Recently I've been planning further up the timeline all the way to the first chapter of act four. More of act three is b

  • edited September 2015

    Edit: Part removed. Liquid brought a really, really big plot hole to my attention that somehow slipped my mind completely. I'm sorry, but this requires a rewrite. I'll either stay up later than I planned or do it first thing in the morning.

  • Fuck Trevor! This was so obviously going to happen, from the moment the group accepted someone as visibly evil as him at the house. I have not expected him to make his move already though. Fuck Clarice, I always knew what a damn bitch she is. And fuck Violet. Separation of morals my ass. Trevor is just a disgustingly one-dimensional cardboard villain without any morals at all and this dumb bitch is not better in any way. Her monstrous brother is about to continue where he left off with Josie and if he causes harm to her even in the slightest, then both siblings have lost their right to live. Also, while I never thought I could ever say it, fuck the group! All of them, for falling right into an obvious trap, that probably gets Josephine killed! They call that 'keeping Trevor on short leash'? Just allowing him to trap them, walk off and return without any problem at all? And they honestly leave Josie all on her own in that basement for the whole night without further guarding the house? Especially Jake is at fault for leaving Trevor back at the house, close to Josephine. And now they are kept from helping her because of fucking belts? And they haven't noticed them being screwed into the wall? Are they goddamn serious here? It is as if they want Josie and Jerry dead. Come on, just take a damn knife and cut through them! Are they all completely stupid? They have to get their damn asses down there and have to save Josie!

    [Hesitate further.]

    Josie is wounded and has to shoot with her weaker and unfamiliar hand. She already failed to hit her target with her strong hand, so the chance of hitting it now are even worse. Instead, she should wait until she got a clear shot on this bastard. The only good thing is that I guess there are three targets at max. Trevor, Clarice and Violet. Zafir wouldn't have trapped the group like that, he would have attacked with all of his men, so I doubt he is involved this time. However, I am pretty sure that both choices here result in bad consequences for Josephine and I am very, very afraid that one of these options could even kill her just like that. I fear I fucked up with that choice. God damn it, Josie mustn't die in that fucking basement D:

    On another note, have you just managed to write this whole part in three hours? I don't know what to say... I am seriously impressed.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    Edit: Part removed. Liquid brought a really, really big plot hole to my attention that somehow slipped my mind completely. I'm sorry, but this requires a rewrite. I'll either stay up later than I planned or do it first thing in the morning.

  • edited September 2015

    Edit: Okay. There's no way around this. I messed up big time when writing this part and now there's a plot hole staring at me. I think this one is the first with a big enough mistake to require a rewrite.

    Fuck Trevor! This was so obviously going to happen, from the moment the group accepted someone as visibly evil as him at the house. I have n

  • edited September 2015

    Okay... that was unexpected, because I haven't encountered any jarring plotholes while reading. The only thing, although it wouldn't be that much of a major detail in my opinion, would be the deal with the electric screwdriver. These things make a lot of noise if I'm not mistakening, so they should have caused someone to wake up. Though, since it looks like the rewrite is a bit bigger, perhaps there is something else I haven't seen as a plothole while reading. Perhaps the whole deal with Trevor just walking in and out of the house as he pleases? Although you brought up a good point fo this situation in your original response. Hopefully you're not angry at me for bringing this apparent plothole up. I also guess that most of the usual readers have already seen my comment, but can't read the part and are now probably left wondering just what exactly happened in it. Also, my response to the part and this response to your comment won't make any sense for anyone else, leaving them even more confused, muahahaha...

    I have seen your original response, but had no time to comment immediately and I will try my best to answer from what I still remember, as I think you brought up some good points. If I recall correctly, your original response mainly included a part about my reasons to hate Violet and a small defense for the group. And If I recall correctly there was also a small part where you hinted that my fear for Josie might be well-founded this time D:

    As for Violet, well, so far she is only Trevor's sister and did nothing bad herself, you are right. However, being Trevor's sister is already bad enough if you ask me, since I don't think she is okay with the group absolutely butchering Trevor for what he did. In the worst case, she even turns against the group the moment Trevor is in danger. Maybe she turns out to be alright, maybe she even opposes her brother, but as long as she doesn't, I'm not taking any risks with her. If she is better than her brother, well, now is her only chance to prove it. I hope at least that she turns against him before he does the really bad stuff to Josie and before Clarice does the really bad stuff to Jerry, but I honestly don't have a lot of hopes for her character.

    As for the group, I think you brought up some good points in their defense and perhaps I was a bit too harsh on most of them. For example, I have forgotten that Jake was on pain medication and I haven't taken Atlanta's exhaustion into mind. Although Josie is similarly exhausted and unless something happened to Calvin or Danny, she is still the only person who had to stay up all night to guard Jerry. Ashley and Dan get a free pass, as she is in no condition to do anything and he is a kid. Atlanta also donated blood to Ashley if I remember it correctly, so she probably feels just as dizzy as Josie feels. However, the one thing I really hold against Jake is the whole Trevor situation. He knew Trevor before and while I doubt that he knew just how sociopathic this bastard is, he at least had to know that he is not exactly trustworthy, right? At least not the kind of person he wants around those he cares for. I mean, everything Trevor said and did so far can be summed up to "Look at me, I'm so evil, harharhar", so there really have been some warning signs. I think Jake is just too gullible. It's actually pretty amazing how quickly he is trying his best to loose his status as one of my favourite characters with his goddamn naivety and stupidity, especially after his involvement in the last two chapters. I think with Jerry still in charge, nothing of this would have happened, as I can't see Jerry trusting Trevor in any way. Damn, I miss the motherfucking Stewart...

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    Edit: Okay. There's no way around this. I messed up big time when writing this part and now there's a plot hole staring at me. I think this one is the first with a big enough mistake to require a rewrite.

  • Everyone in the group has a knife of some kind. The drilling should have definitely woken someone up. There's a few other things I neglected in the original part so I really feel like it needs to be rewritten to a degree. A few details will be changed or added and a whole lot more context is going to be thrown in as well. And I'm definitely not mad at you for bring up the apparent plot holes, I'm actually extremely thankful that you pointed them out so quickly.

    Unfortunately, I can't write right now because I'm heading out of the house in like five minutes and am trying my best to eat my waffles before then. Anyway, I'm going to cut out the choice from the reworked part and just use your answer since it'll be more streamlined when writing it.

    Okay... that was unexpected, because I haven't encountered any jarring plotholes while reading. The only thing, although it wouldn't be that

  • edited September 2015

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 5)

    Dogma

    Trevor Moore

    It was very early in the morning. Most of the others were still asleep. The crackle of the crunching grass was like laughter underneath Trevor’s thick boots. Violet was not him with at the time. She was beginning to distance herself from him. Trevor could feel the wedge being driven between them. But there was someone who shared Trevor’s way of thinking.

    Clarice Willows leaned on the fence that ran between the doctor’s property and the one given to Zafir’s group. There were a couple hundred yards between the two houses, but it was just a two-minute walk to the fence alone. Clarice had been staring at the house until Trevor began his approach, then she started following him with her eyes. Trevor could see the state of the property Zafir’s group had set themselves up. It was once again a small semi-circle of tents and a trailer. The house seemed to be holding most of the members, though. Most were likely asleep.

    Clarice waited until Trevor was only about ten yards away before she acknowledged him. “So, you’re alive,” she sighed, unsurprised and disinterested.

    Trevor waited until he, too, was leaning on the barbed wire fence to reply. “It wouldn’t be the strangest thing to happen, now would it?” His sly, probing eyes looked her up and down before he cracked a smile and went on. “The dead are walking so much, it must be strange to see a dead man living.”

    Clarice didn’t seem to appreciate his smirk. With a roll of the eyes, she turned her back to him and continued to lean on the wooden post. “I’d say someone coming back from the dead is the least of my worries now.”

    Trevor licked his lips and sighed. He changed his perky demeanor to a sympathetic one, accompanied odd slouch. “You know, your absence during the showdown with Jerry and his group was not unnoticed by me.”

    Clarice suddenly angrily frowned towards the camp where she could see Zafir managing a few things completely by himself in the damp morning light. “Zafir,” Clarice hissed with a tone of pure resentment. “I had the biggest stake in killing that fucker Jerry and another fucker thinks I was too emotional to get it done.”

    “I thought I saw a connection there,” Trevor murmured, partly to himself. He leaned towards Clarice slightly and opened his mouth to speak, but for a short while only a wolf-like grin appeared. “You know, Clarice, some things are almost too good to be true…”

    His comment made Clarice look over her shoulder towards him with prying eyes. The expression on her face was one of slight frustrated confusion, but also intrigue. She pursed her lips, obviously not enjoying his company, and said, “Go on.”


    Jake Morrison

    Jake’s eyes slowly opened to the sound of drilling. He peered through the foggy veil of sleep and the medication induced fatigue towards the door and quickly noticed something was awry. Jake sat up as quickly and the room started spinning. The brief dizziness blurred Jake’s vision as he stumbled onto the cold, hardwood floor. Just as quickly as it had come, his head cleared.

    Ignoring the pain returning to his side, Jake pushed forward and approached the door. Even through the drilling noise had stopped, he heard hushed footsteps walking several steps before stopping. He wrapped his fingers around it silently, turned the doorknob and pulled back. It did not move a centimeter. Jake then knocked on the door loudly. “Hey! Who’s out there?”

    Without a reply, jake attempted to pull the door inwards again. As the frustrating sound of drilling returned to his ears, he pressed himself against the door and listened. His brief silence turned to an abrupt shouting. “Who’s out there?!” he cried, banging an angrily curled fist on the door.

    “Atlanta!” Jake shouted with his head hovering over the door. He continued after waiting a second for a reply. “Ashley! Calvin! Danny! Daniel! Josephine!” The stillness that answered him sent a shiver down his spine as he lost control of his breaths. Then the horrifying echo of boots tapping on wood, the sound distancing itself from Jake’s ears at it went down stairs until it dropped completely from his radar.

    More stirring entered the set of vague noises as the doorknob across the hallway turned and lack the sound of the door opening fully. A voice quickly pierced the silence. “Jake?” sounded Atlanta from the other room. “Jake, what’s happening?”

    “We’re trapped in our rooms!” Jake cried through the door. “Who would do this?” Jake huffed under his scattered breath as he pulled violently at the door, its lower and upper corners were the only things moving in the slightest and it appeared the door wouldn’t open. Jake tried to think amidst the confusing that was building in his mind. “Atlanta, wake the others with you and start looking for any way out. I’m climbing out the window.”

    “Are you sure that’s wise?” Atlanta said with a hint of worry escaping her alarmed voice.

    “I can’t bust a door down with a broken rib,” Jake disappointedly admitted. “You just keep trying and I’m going to check on Josephine and see if Danny’s still with her, then I’ll come back up and see if I can help you.”

    “Alright.” Atlanta’s voice disappeared from Jake’s spectrum of hearing until he heard the vaguely audible sound of her panicked voice waking Ashley.

    With that, Jake turned away from the door and grabbed his pistol from its holster that was sat on the nightstand. He didn’t have time to redress and simply started towards the window that faced out towards the dimly lit morning sky. He opened the window, closed it behind him as he stumbled out onto the porch’s roof in his underwear, a gun held tightly in his right hand while the other comforted his damaged side.

    Jake’s eyes widened further as he saw a woman running down the road from the north towards the doctor’s house. She had red, curly hair that was frayed and messy. It was Violet. “Jake!” she cried to him while frantically running up the driveway. “It’s Trevor! Trevor’s going to hurt Josephine! He ditched me at the side of the road so I couldn’t warn you!”


    Josephine Harper

    The faint drilling sound was gone just as quickly as it had started. Replaced now by a frustrated banging. Josephine looked up towards the ceiling and started lowering the book she was reading. A sudden, deathly quiet noise resonated within the basement, and Josephine realized worryingly that it was the sound of doorknob being jiggled. Just like the vague sound of the drill, it was over quicker than it began. Josephine was sure of one thing: someone had just tried the lock.

    Pure worry was biting at her as she rose from the metal chair Danny had brought in when he took his turn to watch over Jerry far earlier that morning. Her hand hovered over the pistol she kept by her side as stood and walked to the start of the stairs, staring up at the door. Seconds passed in the tense silence and absolutely nothing happened. Josephine uneasily put one foot on the first step and stopped again when she heard the distinct sound of hushed, frustrated voices from outside the door. Suddenly, the door’s hinges buckled under an unexpected force attempting to knock the door inward. It produced a hideous sound of cracking wood but thankfully held. Josephine now raised the pistol, pointed it towards the door and waited as it curved with a second heavy push.

    A bullet passed through the wooden door, and Josephine crushed as she covered her eyes with her arms and fell away from the stairs. The bullet ricocheted around the room until it vanished from sight. She pushed herself up from the floor and got away from the stairs just in time as another shot echoed through the air, repeating its sinister cycle until it was lodged in the concrete wall.

    The clatter of metal greeted her still ringing ears, followed by the sound of the damaged wooden door falling open with a creaking, soul wrenching tear. The echo of nearly completely calm footsteps filled the stillness as Josephine did all she could to keep her panicked breaths from overwhelming her and giving away her location in the dimly lit room. Her gun cocked, ready and poised at the corner of the stairs, she prepared for the inevitable final step of the intruder.

    Josephine’s eyes darted towards the ceiling briefly as she heard a rhythmic banging echoing from upstairs. While her eyes were elsewhere, something appeared from the corner and Josephine’s eyes fixed themselves on that area as she pulled the trigger twice without a second of hesitation.

    A piece of cardboard sheet fell to the ground with two newly made bullet holes while one of the bullets ricocheted back towards her and pierced the side of her right arm, causing her to abruptly drop her pistol in a moment of pain as she clutched the wound. The second disappeared him from her view. But the metallic clatter of the pistol woke her from the painful daze and she grabbed it with her newly bloodied, unfamiliar left hand because her other now hurt with agony from the slightest tense of her muscles.

    A brief thought passed through her mind as she considered the consequence of a shot bouncing back once more and injuring herself further, or even killing herself. Another movement caught her eyes as it rounded the corner and she already had the pistol poised with a more wobbly arm, ready to pull the trigger again.

    She hesitated again for half a second as a large figure stepped from beyond the corner and in two giant strides grabbed the muzzle of her pistol just in time to divert the barrel from firing the killing blow. Josephine caused more damage than she originally thought, though, as the stocky man pushed her backward and to the concrete floor angrily and in pain. The bullet that had left the pistol had pierced his knee at an awful, downward angle; the man’s agonizing screams that she strangely couldn’t hear made it apparent his kneecap had likely shattered; his tight grip around the gun’s slide had also proved to be his undoing, as his hand vibrated with pain, bloodied from when the slide ejected the empty bullet casing and cut his palm in several places.

    It was still unfortunately not a victory. The man’s face was made almost unrecognizable by his twisted expression, and her muted hearing faded into a dullness of the senses as she tried to perceive what was happening around herself. The cold figure of a woman step out of the corner cover and grimaced at the unconscious body of Jerry. A string of realization echoing in her face. It was all still just a blur of sight and dulled out sound to Josephine; at that moment she had the vague thought she might have hit her head on the hard floor.

    She was pulled back into reality as the man, limping, grabbed her by the shirt and angrily slammed her against the wall. He seemed to snarl at her, his words unable to pierce the stillness of temporarily deafened ears. He played little attention to the woman behind him, as she graced the table Jerry laid on with her touch. “--Fucking bitch,” he continued, no longer seemingly mouthing the words and instead the full fury of his tone was known to her, “I’ll never fucking run again!”

    Josephine’s senses had all come back to her now. But she was pinned to the wall with her feet hovering over an inch over the floor. And now, before she could even think of a reply, the man pushed against her neck; she started gasping for breath and instinctively clawed at his forearms. A sinister, hard frown appeared on the man’s face and he emotionlessly stared at her. “I don’t think you’re worth all this trouble after all,” he hissed. “Shouldn’t have ever listened to the bitch’s threat. Oh, you can thank Jordan for that when you join her in the fucking afterlife!”

    Josephine’s eyes couldn’t widen anymore than they had; but she realized it all as clear as day when the face of Trevor was highlighted by the glow of the morning sun escaping through one of the windows. It was him, she thought without a shred of hope. It was all him...

    Even with blurring vision and incoherent thought, Josephine saw that the woman was approaching them, and she didn’t look happy. “What the fuck are you doing, Trevor?” she spat, reaching for a sidearm. “This wasn’t part of the plan. This wasn’t a part of the deal.”

    Josephine felt the weight on her throat loosen and she drop that one remaining inch. Her shirt collar was still tightly held in Trevor grip, but he had turned to face the woman. An even colder frown found its way onto Trevor’s face. “Are you completely fucking blind, Clarice?” Trevor asked and unnervingly calm tone. He found a chuckle and waved a finger at Clarice. “You get Jerry and I get her. We each get our own little playthings to do with whatever we want—and I want to kill her.”

    Trevor’s eyes narrowed at Clarice’s waistline and saw her hand hovering over her holster. Clarice shook her head. “Yeah, that’s not going to happen.”

    Trevor gave a pronounced shrug and quietly sighed. “Well,” he said, flashing a defeated look, “it looks like I have been beaten.” The barrel of Trevor’s pistol was raised and the trigger pulled before Clarice could do anything about it. The bullet entered her neck and destroyed her brainstem, killing her almost instantly. The life left her surprised eyes and she swayed backward, falling to the floor with a deathly drop.

    Josephine was left unattended for enough time to regain her breaths. She grabbed Trevor by the ear and attempted to cause some damage to his hearing, but Trevor acted fast and took her wrist in his grasp. He threw her towards the white table Jerry was on and it tipped it over when she came into contact with it; Jerry fell with it and landed behind it, pulling the metal rack down with him with an echoing rattle. Josephine’s head was ringing slightly with the impact, but she still realized that the vice grip on his ear had not been shaken; a torn off ear was in her hand and Trevor was stomping in pain repeatedly.

    He stormed towards her, enraged. “You fucking bitch!” Trevor tried to kick her, but she moved in time of him to just kick the table. He gave up on making her suffer and aimed his gun at her squarely. She froze with a terrified look in her eye as she tried to back away.

    Josephine covered her face and a shot echoed throughout the basement; she opened her eyes just as the body of Trevor stumbled onto the ground. Her eyes looked for the shooter and found him standing at the top of the stairs. It was Jake standing in his underwear with a smoking pistol. He wore a shocked expression but it quickly diminished as she rushed to Josephine and checked to see if she was okay. “Did he hurt you?”

    Josephine nodded. “Yes. I’m okay, though. I’m…” she paused and stared at the body of Clarice with a guilty look in her eyes. “She saved me.” Josephine looked up towards Jake and stuttered, “It… It was him. It was all his fault. It was him!”

    With tears welling in her eyes, she wrapped her arms around Jake and cried into his shoulder. He did his best to comfort her and found himself on the verge of tears. “I’m sorry I let him get so close to you. It’s my fault this happened. None of this was supposed to happen…” He looked at the pistol in his hands and bit his lip. “I felt relief.”

    “Same,” Josephine said. She looked up when she felt a presence and found Violet standing at the top of the stairs. “Did… Did you know?” she asked the woman with a scowl that stared into her soul.

    “He--” Violet’s expression stiffened and twisted. “He confessed everything to me about five miles out and ditched me at the side of the road so I couldn’t tell anyone.” Josephine’s expression softened. Violet tilted head with some conflicted hesitation, gesturing to her brother’s dead body. “I never knew until today what he…”

    When she stopped and didn’t continue, Jake spoke up again. “I’m going to be honest, Violet. I don’t know if I can trust you and I don’t think I should. But I need your help.” He looked at Josephine and grabbed her shoulders. “People are going to be checking out the gunshots anytime now,” he said to Josephine. “Is Jerry okay? If so, we’ve got to move him.”

    Josephine gave a feeble nod. “The table was pushed over and he fell over there,” she answered, she motioned to where he laid, and Jake approached him while one hand rested on the overturned table. “Is he alright?”

    Jake squinted and saw the rise and fall of his chest. “He’s alive. A little bruised and battered, though. If there was any doubt that he wasn’t going to wake up sore, it’s been put to rest.” Jake looked to Violet and gestured for her come down the stairs. “Help me get him upstairs to hid him. Please, Violet, stay in my sight at all times. You too, Josephine.”

    To be continued…

    Sorry for the two daylong delays. It's out now, edited and includes the full part without a choice. Thank you for your patience and I'll hopefully start on the next part soon. I said there would be a whole load of flashbacks, but it's starting to seem that there won't be as many as I thought. The chapter isn't over yet, so there's still some story to unfold. Until then, thank you for reading! :D

  • Holy hell, that was unexpected! I need a moment, that part was crazy...

    First of all, I liked the original part, aside from the (in my eyes) minor plothole with the electric screwdriver, but I have to say that this revised part is indeed a lot better. It all makes a lot more sense now, the added detail really fit in well.

    Now, for the most important thing: Burn in hell, Trevor! Good fucking riddance! I was actually almost sure that he would at least partially succeed in whatever he had planned for Josie and was appropriately afraid of him, but it was extremely satisfying to read how he failed. As expected, he underestimated Josie, but the fact that she still failed to overpower him on her own, despite kneecapping him and ripping off his ear, makes him extremely scary. The determination he showed was terrifying. He would have deserved an even more painful death, but I can't say it wasn't great how Josie fought back at him and how Jake stepped in to end that fucker. Speaking of Jake, in my eyes he fully redeemed himself for his earlier naivety. In the long run, his lack of healthy pragmatism might be a problem, but he makes more than up for it with his bravery. Once again, he saved the day and Jerry and Josie on top.

    And, well, Violet. Fine, I was wrong. She is probably not as bad as her brother and maybe I was a tiny bit unfair towards her. I'm still going to be wary around her, as I don't know if she feels resentful towards Jake and Josie for killing her brother, but I guess she's probably alright. I mean, it could have gone both ways with her and I'm glad that she apparently chose the right side. But the one who really shocked me, more than Violet and even more than Trevor, was Clarice. Now I feel conflicted about goddamn Clarice. On the one hand, she had the intention to kill Jerry and I doubt there would have been any way for her to let go of her vengeance. On the other hand, she stood up against Trevor in an attempt to save Josie's life and that proved that she wasn't all bad. In fact, it looks like she was an okay person underneath her obsession for killing Jerry, and that came as a huge surprise for me. So... rest in relative peace, Miss Willows... I guess?

    And while I am glad that at least the big immediate danger coming from Trevor and Clarice is gone now, I am afraid about what Zafir is going to do, now that he is probably about to find out the truth. This can't end well and Jake better has a real plan this time. Hiding Jerry is a huge gamble that could result in everyones death. I guess it would be the best for the group to get into a truck and drive the hell away from there before Zafir and his men arrive at the scene.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 5) Dogma Trevor Moore It was very early in the morning. Most of the others were still asleep. The crackle of the

  • edited September 2015

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 6)

    Dogma

    Josephine Harper—Route 59—Webb County

    Calvin made Josephine sit on the clean, white loveseat that was stood in sharp contrast to the rest of the room’s bloodied furniture. She wondered if the doctor would put the couch on the side of the road to get rid of it. After the conflict in the basement, and the bloodstained concrete floor that would never come clean, so she wasn’t surprised that the man glanced around his house like he was sizing it up to move elsewhere.

    “It’s looks badly bruised,” Calvin explained while he parted her dark brown hair to examine the mean looking purple bump on the back of her head. “You hit your head on the cement floor, so I’m amazed you don’t appear to have a concussion. It’s still hurts, though?”

    Josephine nodded weakly, grimacing when the motion made her neck tense, reminding her of the pain.“It’s my neck, too.” She didn’t want to say his name, but it slipped out anyway. ”Trevor tried to choke me.” She didn’t want to be reminded of the situation in the cellar anymore. It was a grim, bittersweet feeling of survival. Part of her wanted nothing more than to forget it ever happened. “Where’s danny now?”

    “After Jake found us tied up in the closet, he wanted to get away for a bit. I reckon he went somewhere quiet to think.” Calvin’s eyes shot past Josephine and narrowed on a few people from Zafir’s group helping move the two bodies out of the basement. His eyes refocused on her and softened exponentially. “He’s looking for something more permanent...” his tone dropped to a mere whisper, “for all of us.”

    Josephine understood instantly what he meant and knew not to push the topic along any further. But a question started biting at her and she couldn’t help but ask with an eagerness to leave. “When will it be ready?”

    Calvin flashed a sad, sympathetic smile. “I don’t know for sure. He’s keen to get started, yes. But there’s a few others thing he’s taking care of for us first.” For a moment, he shared Josephine's frown. “Against my judgment, Danny took one of Zafir’s with him. Maria, believe.”

    A genuine smile found its way onto her face when she remembered the teen, Christian. Unfortunately, it sparked a few painful memories. “I’ve heard a little about her. She’s fine, trusted.”

    The doctor bobbed his head up and down, and then stepped back a foot when he had finished inspecting the bruises on her head. “That’s reassuring.” He inclined his head to the stairs leading up. “Jake’s up so you can take his bed.”

    “I don’t feel like sleeping,” Josephine said, almost too quickly. She guessed what she had said was a half lie. She definitely wanted to sleep, but didn’t wish to allow her thoughts to boil.

    “Tell you what,” he said as he clapped his hands together, “I have some books you might want to read. Mostly fiction, but it’s better than lying in bed with nothing but your thoughts for company.” It was like he read her mind.


    Maria Espinosa—Lake Casa Blanca State Park—Laredo, Texas

    She knew where they were the whole drive. It was the single advantage to being in her hometown that Maria could think of being there. She definitely didn’t like to reminisce about the people, the stops, the friends and family members in every waking moment. But herself and Danny were people the ones most familiar with the territory, so naturally she and him were the ones to scout ahead for what Jake had been envisioning.

    First they had taken a right on Route 59 onto Loop 20, winding through the dead traffic of abandoned cars until they reached a turn to the lake road. She knew of a community out the road a couple hundred yards that was ten times better than what they were using by the lake, and was disappointed they couldn’t use those set of houses instead. But they had their instructions. The red truck he drove belonged to Jerry and was what Danny had recovered from his house outside of Laredo. It also curried a third person; lacking a back seat, they had to put their guest in the pickup bed with a canvas tarp to hide him from praying eyes. Luckily it wasn’t particularly warm out. A cool sixty degrees.

    Now on the lake, they drove on an out-of-the-way backroad until they reached a grouping of houses in front of the lake. These homes were engulfed by foliage and unkempt brush lined the roads. It was subtle and hidden from the rest of the town. Exactly what they were told to look for. Maria used her knowledge of the area and remembered the alcove of lakeside houses, one of which belonged to an uncle that had passed a few years before the apocalypse. She vaguely recalled playing by the lake, getting away from her crowded household to stay with her dad’s brother.

    “I didn’t even know about this place,” Danny exclaimed while he unbuckled his seatbelt and climbed from the truck. “Jerry won’t be disturbed here, that’s for sure.”

    Maria gravely nodded and followed him out of the truck. “It’s secure, too. My uncle had barred windows,” she said as she pointed to a red house shrouded by the plants’ shadows.

    “Even better.” He smiled like a kid in a candy store as he strolled up the driveway and entered through the gate. “Let’s check it up and down before we bring Jerry inside.” He inclined his head to the curb where a large for sale sign had been staked into the ground. “It doesn’t look like it’s still for sale.”

    Maria furrowed her eyebrows while looking at the sign and remembered her mother had sold the property to a real estate company since they couldn’t afford to move out of their old house. Although the memory was unhappy, she was glad it had apparently not sold. The faded brick was still disheartening, but she ignored it as the duo came to the front door.

    “So.” Danny scratched the back of his neck. “Do we knock first to check if anyone’s actually home? Even if it hadn’t sold, the fence around it alone makes it a prime shelter for any survivors.”

    “You have a point,” Maria allowed. She stepped in front of him and loudly pounded on the front door fives consecutive times. After that she stopped and put her head to the door to listen for movement. There was a quiet creaking of the floorboards and what sounded like claws tapping on wood. “I think there’s an animal,” she whispered with her ear still cocked.

    Danny licked his dry lips as he pressed himself against the door. “Any idea what kind?” he asked nervously.

    Maria shrugged. “I’ve got no idea.” She banged on the door another three times and listened again. Stillness greeted her.

    “Nothing,” Danny mumbled as he, too, retracted himself from the door. He tested the doorknob and found it was locked. “Let’s go around back, unless you have a key.”

    “Yeah, I had a key. It’s useless, though. They changed the locks when I broke in one time.” Maria started walking around the house while Danny raised an eyebrow.

    “You broke in?” he questioned with a small smirk finding its way onto his face.

    “One time,” she repeated with her back to him. They continued around the side of the house and approached the back door. The backyard had a chainlink fence that faced the lake, whereas the rest of what encircled the property was a wooden privacy fence. It had overgrown grass like almost every other place. The most noticeable aspect was the view of the lake. The silver-colored, still water reflected the overcast perfectly until a breeze blew through and disrupted the calmness.

    Danny reached for the door and jiggled the knob to find it was also locked. “Well, since the windows are barred tight, there’s not many ways inside. Any other plans?”

    Maria racked her brain for anything else that might help them inside without having to permanently break something. She pointed to an air conditioner at one of the back windows where the bars had been cut off to allow it to fit in the window. “We can take that off and climb inside,” she suggested.

    Danny nodded with intrigue. “Will it come off that easily?”

    Maria replied with a shrug and the two approached it. Danny pulled his knife from his pocket and started trying to pray one of the chairs that help support its weight while Maria got to work on the other with her bowie knife. The woods was slightly pulpy and didn’t take work effort to remove the chains from the window frame.

    Maria began pushing her knife into the small plastic screen that filled the gap between the window and the air conditioner and cut a hole big enough to slide her thin arm into. She reached into, scratching her bicep on the rough edges her knife had made. Maria flipped the latch that locked the window and she retraced her arm. Maria gestured for Danny to open the window while the two stood on either side of the air conditioner as, without the window and chairs keeping it in place, it fell to the ground.

    Danny gave Maria a boost through the open window and she climbed through to the other side. Danny tossed her a flashlight from his backpack and she shun the light around the bedroom she had just entered. Walking through the doorway and into a small hallway, she turned the lock and allowed Danny to come inside.

    “Let’s open some curtains,” he proposed. He began to pull open the blinds and allowing the shallow light to illuminate the rooms. He kept a tight grip on his knife as he walked around the house, carefully reminding himself of the animal-like noises Maria had heard.

    The house itself was full furnished and looked very similar to what Mair remembered. It was grim to see it in such a unlively state. Once the ground floor was confirmed to be clear, Maria motioned to a metal spiral staircase with the flashlight and the two ascended.

    Upstairs was not unlike the first floor. There was an uneasy stillness to it that both Maria and Danny were weary of. It was considerably darker up there until Danny started opening the curtains and blinds to allow the light into the rooms. It was less dusty than it was downstairs. The floor creaked beneath Maria as she walked across the hall to another bedroom. Stepping into it, her face lit with shock. “Danny?” she called over her shoulder.

    “What’s up?” he asked as he jogged up to the room and peeked in over her. Inside, a giant dog was sitting at the far end of the room. Danny’s eyes widened and he put the pieces together. “So that’s the animal,” he said, keeping his voice a whisper to not spook the canine.

    Maria studied it for a second and it simply stared back at them, unthreatened. “Uh.” There was a pause. “You think it’s used to people, maybe?”

    “I didn’t see a doggy door, did you?” Danny questioned as he hesitantly stepped into the room. The dog’s ears perked up but it remained seated. “Good boy?”

    Maria smiled and casually walked past the uncertain Danny. She slowly held out her hand and the dog sniffed it before letting her pat its head. “Huh,” she managed. “C’mon, Danny, I don’t think he bites.”

    “You don’t know that,” Danny mumbled to excuse his shy behavior as he, too, approached and dog and mimicked what Maria had done, soon petting the dog’s head.

    “Hey, Danny,” Maria said as she looked towards the bed, “what’s that?”

    Danny turned and looked at a box of sniper ammo sitting on the nightstand. He moved to it as relaxed as he could in hopes he wouldn’t cross onto the dog’s bad side. Picking it up, he opened it and pulled out the biggest bullet he had even seen. “Holy shit,” he exclaimed. “This belongs to sa eriously heavy powered sniper rifle.”

    Maria’s face quaked with a series of realizations and he pointed to the dog again. “Someone’s taking care of him,” she mumbled and tugged at Danny’s shirt. “C’mon, we should get Jerry out of here before he comes back.”

    “Now wait a minute,” Danny said trying to calm her. “Don’t we want to see this person? I mean, they’re clearly a dog person. They can’t be evil. Look this guy,” he gestured to the dog, “he’s as cool as a cucumber.”

    Maria bit her bottom lip and peered out the window to see the pickup parked outside the gate, the bed was undisturbed and Jerry rested there. “I don’t know, man. Our priority is to find a safe place for Jerry to stay while he recovers, if is someone living here, it’s not exactly safe.”

    Danny sighed, considering their options for a second before he raised his hands and waved them around the room slowly. “If he’s been living here, we might be able to find out about them. Maybe we’ll find a telltale sign that they’re an evil bastard, or maybe we’ll find more lovable dogs.”

    [Agree to look around for a bit.]

    [Insist they leave.]

  • [Agree to look around for a bit.]

    Got to be safe for Jerry.

    As for the last part: that was tense. For a second I thought Josie got shot, but then it was Clarice, who I hated just a bit less but still was glad she died.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 6) Dogma Josephine Harper—Route 59—Webb County Calvin made Josephine sit on the clean, white loveseat that was st

  • [Insist they leave.] Dog people are great, dogs are great, but I've got a bad feeling about this dog person.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 6) Dogma Josephine Harper—Route 59—Webb County Calvin made Josephine sit on the clean, white loveseat that was st

  • edited September 2015

    It's good to see that Calvin and Danny are still alive. I was pretty sure that at least Calvin was killed by Trevor and I'm glad that I was wrong here. However, that makes his actions even more creepy, considering that it would have been easier to just kill everyone at the farmhouse than to trap them. It seems that Trevor was so fixed on killing Josie that he hasn't even considered killing the others and that's truly terrifying.

    [Insist they leave.]

    Whoever lives there might be a good person and a useful ally. Or they might be a violent psychopath. Being a dog person means nothing. Hell, even Hitler was a dog person. I don't want to take that gamble and I don't want to risk encountering this person. In any way, I don't want to leave Jerry at a place where a complete stranger lives, so in my eyes it should have a greater priority to find him a safer place. However, it is good that they bring him away from Zafir, that's certainly the right decision.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 6) Dogma Josephine Harper—Route 59—Webb County Calvin made Josephine sit on the clean, white loveseat that was st

  • [Insist they leave.]

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 6) Dogma Josephine Harper—Route 59—Webb County Calvin made Josephine sit on the clean, white loveseat that was st

  • [Insist they leave.]

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 6) Dogma Josephine Harper—Route 59—Webb County Calvin made Josephine sit on the clean, white loveseat that was st

  • Voting is closed!

    (!) Maria will insist they leave immediately

    I've gotten the continuation of Maria's part written out already, but the point of view after it might take a while to finish, even though it's half done. It may also very well be the final part to this chapter and subsequently this act. The flashback situation is looking grimmer. I've come up with an alternative for the storytelling purpose they were meant to fulfill. It seems to be a good substitute. Now, one big thing is that this part will possibly be in several parts if it's too big. I'm unsure what the limit is, but when it's all complete with the previews and act epilogue, I think it will surpass that. Anyway, I look forward to showing you this finale part and looking even more forward to what comes after. Good day, fellas. I'll see you soon.

    NoHopeLeft posted: »

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 6) Dogma Josephine Harper—Route 59—Webb County Calvin made Josephine sit on the clean, white loveseat that was st

  • edited September 2015

    CHAPTER TEN (Part 7)

    Dogma

    Maria Espinosa—Lake Casa Blanca State Park—Laredo, Texas

    Maria pointed a finger at the door and sternly looked Danny. “We aren’t going to test that,” she said. “I have a few other places we can try for a safe house.” She stroked the dog’s head and it happily wagged its tail. “Let’s this place in mind, maybe we can get in touch with whoever lives here later, but for now Jerry needs somewhere he can keep his head down.”

    “Unoccupied, sounds better,” Danny commented as he placed the bullet and box where he found it. “It’s missing three of them,” he mentioned on his way out of the room. “It’s odd, why take so few?”

    She caught up with him and looked over her shoulder to see the dog following them out of the room and down the spiral stairs. “Maybe they’re confident.” Maria stopped the dog from following Danny out the window by a gentle pull of its collar and it surprising stopped and sat.

    “Lock the back door, will you?” Danny asked politely as he pulled something from his backpack.

    She rolled her eyes at him as she turned the lock. “They’ll know we were here either way,” she said as she followed him out the window. He was quickly writing on a piece of crumpled paper pressed up against the door. “You’re leaving a freaking note?”

    “Well, yeah,” he said, shaking his head at her. “Unless we want to stay yeah longer to fix it, the air conditioner’s… condition is pretty noticeable. Whoever lives here will know we were been here. Let’s not give them the wrong idea about why we broke in. Who knows, if they have the rifle that goes with those bullets, they could be very well watching us from across the lake, looking for a reason to shoot.”

    Maria’s eyes jumped to the waterfront and frowned when considering the thought that they were being watched as they spoke. “Let’s get out of here, then,” she urged him along.

    Danny, frustrating Maria slightly, shook his head again. “Not until we give them a reason to not shoot. I know if someone broke into my house, then took the time to leave a note explaining what happened, I’d probably be a lot more sympathetic to them, and I also probably wouldn’t shoot them since it’s pretty considerate.”

    Maria involuntarily rolled her eyes again and looked over the note Danny had written. It repeated some of their reasons for being there, Maria’s relations with the previous owner, an apology for breaking the air conditioner. He also put down a comment about how well-trailed and friendly the dog was. “Kissass,” Maria joked.

    It sparked a smirk from Danny and he slipped the note in the window they climbed through and then followed her back around the house. After checking up with Jerry, they found that he was in the same condition as when they left the truck earlier. One U-turn later, and they were heading out of the state park. After they found a place for Jerry to keep low, it would be time to begin plan A and B.


    Jake Morrison—Route 59—Webb County

    It was cloudy, as usual. The colder months were ahead. The sides of the road were still dusty tan and splattered with some greenery, but it was mostly a yellow and orange palette, with the gray, cloud-filled sky making it impossible to feel warm in the coolness.

    The chilliness made Jake shiver, irritating his pained side with the involuntary shaking. His hands felt somewhat numb and stiff at the wheel of the truck. The heater could only do some much after just being started minutes prior. It would warm up soon enough, but he couldn’t let himself get comfortable with his passenger sitting right next to him. It was unconscious, but there was some merit to the uneasiness. He shouldn’t let himself get cozy in Zafir’s presence.

    He needed to be one step ahead of him at all times. He needed a plan, and that was what he was working on at the moment. Dividing his attention between controlling the vehicle and coming up with the full makings of his scheme. Danny was taking care of step one: find a place for Jerry to lay low. Step two was also the boy’s responsibility. While Jake was occupied with other matters, someone needed to survey the area, especially the abandoned safe-zone on either side of the border for the possibility of reestablishing one of them. If either proved inhospitable, his eyes were also on several other options.

    The air emanating from the vents suddenly took on a soothing warmth, and Jake couldn’t help but sigh with relief. In his peripheral vision, he saw the disgruntled mummy relax only slightly.

    They were on their way to Danny’s farmhouse where he had buried Jordan and made the fake grave for Jerry. But in the bed of the pickup truck, there was only one body as opposed to the two. It was Jake who wanted to bury that monster nowhere near Jordan. Clarice, on the other hand, deserved some respect. It was she who they planned to bury in the makeshift graveyard. Zafir had brought up the point of the being buried next to her brother’s killer, Jake retorted they won’t have to be right beside each other. It had been enough at the time to silence Zafir.

    “We’re here,” Jake announced soberly when the farmhouse was in sight. The barn on the property was a faded, disheartening red. Visible from the side of the road, the upstairs window that faced the yard were torn up from a firing squad of bullets and as Jake pulled past the driveway, he saw that the truck belonging to Jerry was gone. Sensing Zafir had noticed, he spoke up. “Danny took it with him.”

    A slow nod replied acted as the reply and the car’s swung open as the two surveyed the area. Jake’s eyes landed on the barbed wire fence with disgusting, dried blood clinging onto the spikes. Zafir’s expression was stone cold the whole walk. “Did he say when he buried them?” Zafir asked with a piercing glare as he scouted the yard for turned earth.

    “Behind the house,” Jake replied, already halfway to the side of the house. “That’s what he said, at least.”

    The slow nod returned again though Jake couldn’t see with his back to Zafir.

    The duo quickly reached the back of the house and found the turned dirt of two graves, close together, two wooden markers acting as headstones with their first names carved into them. There was a small pile of discarded wood by the steps up the back door that Zafir approached. He retrieved a single piece, produced a pocket knife from his belt and nodded a final time with only a little more life. “Pull the truck around,” he ordered.

    Jake gave a feeble bob of the head and started back to the truck. With him gone, Zafir could know for sure. He knelt by Jerry’s grave and pushed the dirt aside with his knife. The cold, dead, purple forehead of a man greeted him that was already decomposing. His head had a bullet hole borrowed into his forehead and out the left temple. Still unsatisfied, Zafir patted down the dirt when he heard the crunch of gravel beneath the tires of the truck.

    He began carving Clarice’s name into the scrap of wood and was justing finishing the A when Jake pulled around the corner, backing towards Zafir with the tail of the truck. He climbed from it and opened the back end, all the while Zafir continued with the headstone.

    Jake pitched a shovel to Zafir, who caught it despite the distraction of carving the wood. “Let’s start digging,” Jake suggested as he walked past Zafir, past Jordan’s grave and finally stopped a fair six feet from it. “We’ll dig here.”


    A comment was tossed from Zafir’s lips as they dug. “It’s strange standing over him,” he mumbled with his attention mainly on the task of digging. It struck Jake as odd, and his silence sparked another statement. ”Just a patch of dirt now, that’s all he is.” Eyes narrowed, he continued. “Maybe it’s all any of us ever are.”

    “I can’t say you make a good poet. Is there something you need to get off your chest?” Jake asked breathlessly as he spooned one shovelful of dirt from the hole after another.

    “Is Jerry really dead?” The question hit Jake hard and his eyes shot up from his work. “I feel like I killed him, but I also feel like my business isn't finished.” Zafir’s eyes met Jake’s. “I wanted to kill you, you know. I was going to kill you.”

    “I know,” Jake replied as he resumed digging. “But you’ve changed. You never had to kill me. You never had to Jordan, either, but that dice has been rolled.” He paused with inevitability. “It can’t be picked up again.”

    “Then why do I feel so empty?” Zafir question. “I feel like the job just isn’t finished.”

    “Because killing someone isn’t supposed to make you feel better.” A hint of opposed anger was in Jake’s voice and expression, but he brushed it off for the following sentence. “Since you can’t change what happened, I’d suggest you just move on and forget. That emptiness and feeling incomplete, it’s part of that.”

    “Unfinished,” Zafir repeated for the final time. Their eyes met again and when Jake realized what was happening, it was already too late. Zafir had stopped digging entirely and instead pointed his pistol at Jake.

    A sad expression formed on Jake’s face. “Am I the unfinished business?” he asked depressedly. “Killing me won’t satisfy that emptiness, Carter.”

    “I haven’t decided if you’re apart of this. I’m not sure if I should kill you for betraying me like I did to Jordan. It would be unfair to spare you when I killed her. But this isn’t about you right now.” He shook his head slowly. “This is about a man named Jerry Stewart.”

    “Jerry Stewart is dead,” Jake replied sternly as he planted his shovel in the cold earth threateningly. “He’s been dead for a day now. It’s time to let this matter rest. Do you want to regain your humanity? Stop looking for a reason to shoot me.”

    Zafir inclined his head towards the grave marked ‘Jerry.’ “I checked the grave. This person has been dead longer than a day.” He reinforced his grip of the butt of the pistol. “Now stop digging Clarice’s grave, it’s shallow but deep enough.”

    “Seriously, Zafir, besides the age of the body in there, what possibility makes you think Jerry’s alive?” Zafir looked towards Clarice’s body with Jake following his line of sight. He sneered. “It’s a hunch, isn’t it?”

    “It’s more than that, we both know it.” Zafir briefly pointed to the other man’s belt. “Give me your pistol or I’ll have to kill you now.” Jake reluctantly complied and resentful tossed his gun to Zafir’s feet. “Now walk towards the grave, slowly.”

    Jake’s climbed out of the hole and gritted his teeth as he stood over Jerry’s fake grave. Zafir pronounced his pistol some more and gestured with it to the grave. Jake went on his knees and uncovered the foot of loose dirt on top of the body. Danny had recreated the injury well for the show, but there was alone so much he could have done. The body was now visible to Zafir’s eyes. It was not Jerry.

    “Jake, if you want to live any longer, you’ll tell me where Jerry really is.” He pressed the barrel to Jake’s back and made him walk a step. “But first thing’s first: drag Clarice out of the truck and bury her. You know, it was Clarice’s betray that pointed me in the right direction. She didn’t want revenge on any of your group. She wanted Jerry’s head. That’s what confused me most. She wouldn’t ally herself with the likes of Trevor for any reason but that.” He gave a proud smile. “Jerry was in the basement at one point. And we’ll get to that. For just finish this…”

    Jake kept quiet for the rest of the time at the farmhouse. Pistol hovering above him as he pulled Clarice into the shallow grave, he began covering her with the dug out dirt until she was covered completely. Then Zafir offered him the grave marker and Jake spitefully took it, planting it as her headstone. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed the other man had uprooted the piece of wood at the head of the grave and gestured to Jake with it. “We’ll need this soon,” he said with a cocky tone behind a bitter expression. “Now get in the driver’s seat. You’re taking me to wherever you have him hidden.”

    “Fine.” Jake walked towards the truck and climbed in. He snapped his seat belt in place with Zafir climbing in next to him. “We won’t be stopping at the camp, though. We'll be driving into Laredo. If you try to get a word out to anyone, I won’t go along with this. It’s you and me, or I’ll sooner die.”

    “Is this some poorly thought out escape plan brewing?” Zafir blinked slowly and when his eyes reopened, they grew with overconfidence and arrogance. “It won’t work. And so you know, I’ll consider letting you live once I have Jerry. Though your fate remains to be planned.”

    How reassuring, Jake thought in silence.


    Jake stole a look at the doctor’s house. He could see Josephine sitting at the window sill in the upstairs bedroom with a book in her hands. She looked up with the passing of the truck, but it was already too late. The coal-black vehicle had drove by the two properties in a matter of ten to twenty seconds. Jake no intentions of leading Zafir to where Jerry was—he didn’t actually know Jerry’s current location. He supposed it was a good thing. It meant they couldn’t beat it out of him. He could still reveal under pained torture that Danny and Maria had taken him into the city, but it wouldn’t do much in way of actually finding the man.

    PART ONE OF TWO

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