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Corrupted Wish

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  • MaxilyahMaxilyah
    edited December 2008
    Granted. Your computer now downloads a millisecond faster. Congratulations.

    I wish for an immortal hamster who does whatever I tell it to.
  • Ugly BirdUgly Bird
    edited December 2008
    Granted, but you quickly discover that your hamster is completely deaf, so you can't tell it to do anything. You quickly grow bored of it and end up chucking it out the window.

    I wish for awesome telekinetic powers, that I will use for good, and not for Earl.
  • MaxilyahMaxilyah
    edited December 2008
    Granted, but everyone thinks you're a freak and scientists start to do painful and tedious tests on you because they want your powers.

    I wish Sam and Max lived in my neighborhood... and didn't try to injure and/or kill me.
  • Ugly BirdUgly Bird
    edited December 2008
    Granted. Sam and Max live in your neigborhood and inexplicably leave you exempt from their natural inclination toward carnage, but they end up killing/injuring everyone and everything you care about, so although you yourself are completely unharmed, you end up in a world where you have no reason to live (save to enjoy watching the antics of Sam and Max, which I disturbingly suspect might be enough for you).

    I wish for awesome BUT DISCREET telekinetic powers, which I will use for good and not for Earl.
  • MaxilyahMaxilyah
    edited December 2008
    (Do you mind if I use the first part of that post in my signature? It's just too funny to pass up. XD)

    Granted. You can now bend string with your mind. But since string is already bendy as is, you grow bored with the power and wish you'd been more specific. ;)

    I wish for a delicious cheesecake that is not poisoned, tainted, spoiled, explosive, and I won't choke on it. :P
  • Ugly BirdUgly Bird
    edited December 2008
    (Sure. No problem. Go right ahead. :))

    You eat the cheese cake and it tastes delicious, but it was rather small. Also, seconds later Sam and Max storm into the room and announce that the cheese cake you just ate is somehow vital to the resolution of their current case and subsequently attempt to "extract" it from your stomache with a few of their inventory items. After succeeding only to cause you horrible pain (in a few ways that I feel it is best not to mention) they finally decide to use their "nausea inducing parakeet figurine" on you, which finally does the trick. After they scoop up the half-digested remains of your cheese cake and bid you fairwell, you find that the whole experience was so horrifyingly unpleasant that you are unable to bring yourself to eat cheese cake ever again.

    I wish prestigious awards, including the Nobel Peace Prize.
  • MaxilyahMaxilyah
    edited December 2008
    (I'm running out of ways to make people's lives miserable. >.<)

    Granted, but the awards are stolen from people who actually earned them, and so you go to jail.

    I wish I had a sniper rifle to use whenever I please without fear of being shot by another person with a gun or of being arrested for using the gun illegally.
  • MouldcubeMouldcube
    edited December 2008
    granted, but no-one will sell you any ammo for it and you didn't start with any so it's pretty useless.

    I wish I had more motivation to work on a flash animation that I was making for a friend (which should have been made by christmas, but I've only done one line of speech, voice sync is surprisingly tedious).
  • metalkombatmetalkombat
    edited December 2008
    Granted, but then all of the tools you need to make the flash animation disappear. How unfortunate.


    I wish this year to be great for everyone.
  • Ugly BirdUgly Bird
    edited January 2009
    Granted. Everyone is happy and totally doing great this year, and everyone somehow gets along with everyone else, but this just sort of makes the whole world reseble a giant, year-long episode of "Barney". Disgusting...fortunately, when the year is over, everyone starts fighting again and all the wars come back bigger and bloodier than ever.

    I wish for Pandora's box. I'm not going to open it. I just want to see what it looks like.
  • StinkomanFanStinkomanFan
    edited January 2009
    you get it but you drop it and it breaks open

    I wish for Leonerd Maltin to die.
  • Ugly BirdUgly Bird
    edited January 2009
    He dies, but it is later discovered that the cure for cancer was in his blood. Your wish just doomed millions of cancer patients to death. Oops.

    I wish for one perfectly unspoiled wish.
  • StinkomanFanStinkomanFan
    edited January 2009
    You get it but it was the wish for the wish

    I wish for $5 that weren't stolen or counterfit
  • MouldcubeMouldcube
    edited January 2009
    you get it, but you can't wish for any more. pity.

    I wish that I could use telepathy to tell whoever replies to this that they got what goes wrong with this wish wrong.
  • yogurtmano8675309yogurtmano8675309
    edited January 2009
    you do but there is so much future mind reading that the world explodes

    i wish that my break would never end so that i dont have to go back to p.e. and do dancing
  • MouldcubeMouldcube
    edited January 2009
    it never ends, but then you become stupid from not doing anything and become homeless because you haven't got a job to pay for a house.

    I wish for the number 53.
  • 16_BIT_MARIO116_BIT_MARIO1
    edited January 2009
    You get a giant statue of the number 53. It falls over and crushes you to death.

    I wish for the burn on the back of my hand to heal. And for no other burns to appear anywhere else on my body.
  • metalkombatmetalkombat
    edited January 2009
    Granted, but you unfortunately fall into a volcano. You cannot die by the burns you obviously would receive, so you slowly die of starvation in the unbearable heat instead.

    I wish for a chocolate milkshake. Preferably from Dairy Queen.
  • StinkomanFanStinkomanFan
    edited January 2009
    You get it dumped on your head

    I wish for a pet rock
  • 16_BIT_MARIO116_BIT_MARIO1
    edited January 2009
    Granted, but it's more of a boulder. And it falls on you.

    I wish I was a fish good writer!
  • MouldcubeMouldcube
    edited January 2009
    you become one of the best writers ever, but everyone gets jealous of you and kills you with ink poisoning.

    I wish for a hat.
  • 16_BIT_MARIO116_BIT_MARIO1
    edited January 2009
    You get a hat used in medieval torture devices. Need I say more?

    I wish for my handwriting to be twice as good with absolutely no negative consequences whatsoever.
  • MaxilyahMaxilyah
    edited January 2009
    Granted. But if there were no negative consequences, we'd have no game, right? So now you're bored. Get over it.

    I wish for Sam's fedora. XD
  • 16_BIT_MARIO116_BIT_MARIO1
    edited January 2009
    Granted. But it's from Culture Shock, so you are easily hypnotized and forced to jump off of a cliff.

    I wish for a dollar. I don't even care if it's from another country; I just want a dollar.
  • MaxilyahMaxilyah
    edited January 2009
    Granted. You get a sand dollar. :P

    I wish for lots of whipped cream.
  • 16_BIT_MARIO116_BIT_MARIO1
    edited January 2009
    You get so much, it crushes you to death.

    I wish my bird would just SHUT UP.
  • MouldcubeMouldcube
    edited January 2009
    He be's quiet, and instead, next doors bird just starts, louder than yours.

    I wish for two buckets full of jelly.
  • StinkomanFanStinkomanFan
    edited January 2009
    You get it dumped on your head

    I wish for a Teddy bear
  • MouldcubeMouldcube
    edited January 2009
    you get a vicious real bear nemed teddy.

    I wish for all the future episodes of sam and max.
  • 16_BIT_MARIO116_BIT_MARIO1
    edited January 2009
    Granted, you get all the future episodes of the nonexistent Sam & Max TV show.

    I wish Mr. Passion had a lower HP level. (Mother 3)
  • Gman5852Gman5852
    edited January 2009
    Granted but his defense raised enough to make him invinsible.

    I wish for a faster computer.
  • StinkomanFanStinkomanFan
    edited January 2009
    You get it but it crashes after 3 days

    I wish for a new hat
  • 16_BIT_MARIO116_BIT_MARIO1
    edited January 2009
    You get Sam's fedora. *See post 65*

    I wish I could think of something to wish to wish for.
  • MouldcubeMouldcube
    edited January 2009
    you think of something to wish for, but you used up your last wish, so you can't wish for it. (just pretend you have limited wishes for the purpose of that post).

    I wish for my own pair of shoes...that don't get chewed by my dog.
  • StrongBadinatorStrongBadinator
    edited January 2009
    you get them, but they dont fit. darn.

    i wish for a bucket of fried chicken thats not too big to crush me.
  • King of The CheatSmithKing of The CheatSmith
    edited January 2009
    The mixing went wrong and it was poisoned. (you should have seen it coming)

    I wish I had contacts.
  • MouldcubeMouldcube
    edited January 2009
    you get more for your money...err...wish, you get contact lenses (that are too big for your eyes...and even too big for a boulder to wear around it, what idiot even made those contact lenses?) and you get people to contact...that don't like you.

    I wish for a magical land that I can alter with my mind.
  • King of The CheatSmithKing of The CheatSmith
    edited January 2009
    All your altering broke the balance of space and time, sucking you into a endless void, in which you die of starvation.

    I wish I had chocolate that wasn't poisoned.
  • StinkomanFanStinkomanFan
    edited January 2009
    you get a Chocolate bar but your dentist shows up and takes it away from you

    I wish for a Rubix Cube
  • MouldcubeMouldcube
    edited January 2009
    your head a-splode because you can't solve it.

    I wish that I had a lappy like strong bads.
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