The dark before the dawn. Interactive story

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  • [Which side of the war are you on?]

    mr.quality posted: »

    Samu Kuusi ~ I got his name right this time "Don't back down. We take our stand and fight. Right here, right now." Samu barked into the

  • Yes, i am!

    mr.quality posted: »

    Super! You're back!

  • Yay!

    supersagig posted: »

    Yes, i am!

  • [Which side of the war are you on?]

    mr.quality posted: »

    Samu Kuusi ~ I got his name right this time "Don't back down. We take our stand and fight. Right here, right now." Samu barked into the

  • Woo Hoo! I just passed my drivers test with a 90%!

    Anyways. If I get to it, new part tonight.

  • Congratulations :D

    mr.quality posted: »

    Woo Hoo! I just passed my drivers test with a 90%! Anyways. If I get to it, new part tonight.

  • Thanks!

    Congratulations

  • Congrats! I had to wait until I was 18 to get my license and I got 95%, its always tight parking areas that's rough for me D:

    mr.quality posted: »

    Woo Hoo! I just passed my drivers test with a 90%! Anyways. If I get to it, new part tonight.

  • [Which side of the war are you on?]

    mr.quality posted: »

    Samu Kuusi ~ I got his name right this time "Don't back down. We take our stand and fight. Right here, right now." Samu barked into the

  • Good for you! :D

    mr.quality posted: »

    Woo Hoo! I just passed my drivers test with a 90%! Anyways. If I get to it, new part tonight.

  • I have yet to take the road portion, I've only done the written part thus far, since I have to wait until I turn sixteen to get my licence. Thanks!

    Congrats! I had to wait until I was 18 to get my license and I got 95%, its always tight parking areas that's rough for me

  • Thank you!

    supersagig posted: »

    Good for you!

  • Dillon

    "Alright, go on through." The boarder guard said. The Mexican boarder looked like the entire Mexican Army, and then some just decided to camp out there.

    "Your not going to even check my papers?" Dillon asked.

    "Kid." The guard said lowering his voice to a whisper. "I'm on your side. Robert told me you were coming. Go into the city and into the only open bar. You'll find a man there. He will help you from there." The guard said. "Now go." He said. Dillon calmly walked past the boarder and into Mexico. He could feel the soldiers staring him down waiting for him to do something, And some of them looked like they wanted to shoot him anyways.

    "Vete a casa, gringo." One spat.

    "Uh, no habla?" Dillon said. He continued walking and soon was away from the soldiers and into the city, which had police crawling all over it. They were taking security to the next level. After a few minutes of useless wandering Dillon finally found it, a bar. Dillon pushed the door open and walked in. The place was mostly empty. Dillon walked through the bar towards the counter until a voice stopped him.

    "Americano, over here." A man called. Dillon turned to his right and saw a man sitting back at a table. He was wearing a black suit and sunglasses. Dillon slowly walked over to the table and took a seat. "Dillon?" He asked.

    "Yes." Dillon confirmed.

    "Good. We don't have much time. You want the trust of the Mexican government, Si?" The man asked.

    "I guess, yeah." Dillon said.

    "There's some serious shit going down in the area. Being this close to the boarder, it's only natural. The worst part, it's happening right under the policia's noses. First off, we got the drug traders. Normal stuff, no big deal. Except these guys are armed to the teeth, they back rebels who support the Network. They have a lot of support in the area. Meaning, if we slip up, we have half of the Mexican rebels up our ass in a matter of minutos." He said.

    "You said there was more, what else?" Dillon asked.

    "Human trafficking. Right outside the city. The Network captures civilians, and then sells them to the Mexican people. Mainly people who need cheap labor and rich politicians for reasons best left unsaid." He said.

    "So? What's the job?" Dillon asked.

    "One of their little 'trades' are going down in El Brasil, just a few miles from here. The job is we get there before they do, set up some cameras or something and catch evidence of this shit." He said, then paused. "I suppose if you're feeling lucky we could try to play savior and liberate the presos." He said. "Your choice, amigo."

    Choice

    [Attack the drug empire]

    [Investigate the human trafficking, not saving prisoners.]

    [Investigate human trafficking, saving prisoners.]


    Santiago Gonzales

    "What side of this shitshow are you people on?" Santiago asked. The woman pondered this a moment before answering.

    "We're on our side." She answered.

    "What's that supposed to mean?" Santiago asked.

    "That's another question." She said. "You about ready to roll?" She asked the doctor.

    "Yup. Let's move." He said.

    "Catch you later kid." She said as they ran off down the hallway and disappeared. Santiago sat in silence trying to figure out what was going on.

    "The militia of Maine... What is Maine doing here? Shouldn't they be, I don't know. In Maine?" Alex's voice asked. Santiago looked over and saw her in her bed across the hall.

    "I don't know, but I'm not questioning it. This might just be the break we needed." Santiago said.

    "Maybe." Alex said. "Maybe not."

    "Why do you say that?" Santiago asked.

    "Maybe they just traveled a hundred miles out of the kindness of their hearts just to help us. Or maybe they traveled a hundred miles to make themselves look like heroes so they can take over." She said.

    "Oh." Santiago said, and the two feel silent.

    "So, how are you feeling? I mean, with being shot and all." Alex asked.

    "It doesn't really hurt. I mean, I can feel it. But it doesn't hurt." Santiago said.

    "Lucky. I hurt every time I breath." Alex said.

    "Sorry." Santiago said.

    "You need to quit being so sorry all the time. You've done nothing." Alex said.

    "I've abandoned my sister, got my parents killed, hesitated to help you, and killed a man." Santiago said.

    "No. You saved me, ended the life of a horrible person who killed many people, and a lot more. You always over look everything good you do when something bad happens. But no matter what you think, I think you've done just fine." Alex said. A sly smile pulled at Santiago's lips until he heard something next to him and looked over. Lucia had woken up and was rubbing her forehead.

    "What the fuck? How'd I get here? I was passed out in the west hallway." Lucia said.

    "The militia brought you here. They found you. What happened?" Santiago asked.

    "Well, as it would turn out. My friend, Azumi. Was working as a Network spy. She pulled me off down a hallway and jabbed me with a needle. Next thing I know, I'm trapped in some terrible nightmare." Lucia said.

    "Sorry to hear that." Santiago said. Lucia stood up and nearly fell back down but managed to maintain her footing.

    "I don't need anyone feeling sorry for me." Lucia said.

    "Should you really be up?" Alex asked.

    "I'm fine." Lucia said as she began walking down the hallway.

    "Wait, Lucia." Santiago said.

    "What?" Lucia asked, turning around.

    "You said you had a nightmare. What was it about?" Santiago asked.

    "Why do you care?" Lucia asked.

    "Because I'm your brother." Santiago said. "You aren't doing anything else." Santiago said. Lucia huffed and walked back sitting back down on her bed.

    "Fine. I was back where it began. For me at least." She began. "New York city, right outside the park was an apartment building..." She said.

    "And inside there was a dead woman out side room 785?" Santiago asked.

    "How'd you know?" Lucia asked.

    "I was there. I had the same dream. Did your dream say anything?" Santiago asked.

    "What Kind of question is that?" Lucia asked.

    "Like, did it come with some creepy ass cryptic message?" Santiago asked.

    "Not really. But part of the nightmare was when the dead woman told me to come to her. Then I woke up." Lucia said.

    "This can't just be a coincidence." Santiago said.

    "What do you mean?" Lucia asked.

    "My dream told me I have to go there. If both of us have the same message. We need to go there Lucia." Santiago said.

    "No. No way in hell am I ever going back there." Lucia said.

    "Why?" Santiago asked.

    "You weren't there. I was." Lucia said. "You want to go chase down what a drug endued dream tells you, be my guest. But I don't want to go back... I can't." She said.

    "Santiago, this is just about to blow my mind." Alex said. "After I was beaten to a bloody pulp I had the same dream. Or one like that. It told me I had to go to the 'Heart of Dixie'." She said.

    "The Heart of Dixie? What the hell is that?" Santiago asked.

    "Alabama. It's the states nickname." Lucia said. "Look, if your going to be stupid enough to go after whatever the hell this is, I'm coming with you. No matter how much I don't want to. I lost you once and I don't want to lose you again. So I guess if you want to check out New York city, we can." Lucia said.

    Choice

    [Do it.]

    [Ignore it.]

  • [Investigate human trafficking, saving prisoners.]

    Perhaps they can do some good work in the process.

    [Do it.]

    I'm a bit torn. On the one hand, this sounds interesting. On the other hand, I'm pretty fixed on the creepy dreams=death theory, so it could be better to stay the hell away from whatever the creepy dream man wants from him. I see Alex had a dream too and it was something heart-related, which makes me worried for her. That is oddly similar to Katie's dream and we all know how that turned out.

    By the way, I got a question: If Katie wouldn't have checked out that damn valley in the middle of the night, what would have happened?

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "Alright, go on through." The boarder guard said. The Mexican boarder looked like the entire Mexican Army, and then some just deci

  • By the way, I got a question: If Katie wouldn't have checked out that damn valley in the middle of the night, what would have happened?

    1.) She'd be alive, unharmed in any way.

    2.) Denver would not be a traitor.

    3.) The following morning, the camp would've been attacked. Katie would manage to escape, possibly being the only survivor.

    [Investigate human trafficking, saving prisoners.] Perhaps they can do some good work in the process. [Do it.] I'm a bit torn. On t

  • edited July 2015

    1.) She'd be alive, unharmed in any way.

    So, that means she's confirmed dead now? Oh damn it... DAMN IT. I mean, I was prepared for consequences coming out of this, but to think that it could be a live or death choice for her... Although I'm just as concerned about the (possibly permanent) consequences such a fall could have in the worst case, even if she would have survived it.

    By the way, I realized she is missing from the main post. Just thought I should point it out.

    2.) Denver would not be a traitor.

    That just managed to amplify my hatred on him even more. I thought about it, what would he even get from betraying her? Does he really trust the Network in not attacking them, now that they know he has enough money to hire a small army against them? He can't be stupid enough to think he tricked them, can he? And was the money he got really enough to justify murdering a friend and icon of the rebellion? No, that bastard can claim good intentions for all he want, but I guess in the end he betrayed her out of spite or something like that. Someone has to hurt him really, really bad for what he did.

    3.) The following morning, the camp would've been attacked. Katie would manage to escape, possibly being the only survivor.

    The other people from her camp are all dead to me either way (except Denver of course, whom I really want to see suffering), so that wouldn't have been a loss. They would have deserved it for working with Denver. Damn it! Fucking valley and fucking Network and especially fucking Denver.

    mr.quality posted: »

    By the way, I got a question: If Katie wouldn't have checked out that damn valley in the middle of the night, what would have happened?

  • [Investigate human trafficking, saving prisoners.]

    [Do it.] Hope they have a road trip mix ready

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "Alright, go on through." The boarder guard said. The Mexican boarder looked like the entire Mexican Army, and then some just deci

  • [Attack the drug empire]

    [Do it.]

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "Alright, go on through." The boarder guard said. The Mexican boarder looked like the entire Mexican Army, and then some just deci

  • [Investigate human trafficking, saving prisoners.]

    [Do it.]

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "Alright, go on through." The boarder guard said. The Mexican boarder looked like the entire Mexican Army, and then some just deci

  • [Investigate human trafficking, saving prisoners.]

    [Do it.]

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "Alright, go on through." The boarder guard said. The Mexican boarder looked like the entire Mexican Army, and then some just deci

  • Dillon

    "I don't think I'm stupid enough to try and take on some drug lords on my own." Dillon said.

    "So, you want to go after the human trafficking? I assume you want to play hero to." He said.

    "You'd be right." Dillon said.

    "Alright then. Lets get moving." He said as he stood up and began to walk out, with Dillon following.

    "So, where's the car?" Dillon asked once outside, the man laughed.

    "No motor vehicles in Mexico. Only government employees gets a car." He answered.

    "What kind of rule is that?" Dillon asked.

    "Don't ask." He said.

    "So, how do you suppose we get there?" Dillon asked.

    "By horse." He said.

    "Great." Dillon said.


    Santiago Gonzales

    "We have to do this." Santiago said. Lucia dropped her head.

    "Fine. If it's so important to you, then we can go." Lucia said.

    "But first thing first, we have to get out of here." Alex said.

    "What's this 'we' thing? No one ever said you were coming." Lucia snapped at her.

    "Lucia, she had one of those dreams to. It could be important." Santiago said.

    "It was in Alabama! Do you know how far away Alabama is?" Lucia asked.

    "Pretty far." Santiago admitted.

    "But still, maybe I can help you." Alex said.

    "Or maybe you just get in our way." Lucia said.

    "Cut it out Lucia. She just wants to help, and besides, we can't just get up and leave." Santiago said. "There's kind of a war going on out there."

    "So you're going to take her side over your own sister? Fine." Lucia huffed as she stood up and stormed off down the hallway. A few moments later Santiago heard the sound of a jet fighter flying low enough over the building to rattle the walls.

    "Do you think that was ours?" Alex asked.

    "I don't remember having any planes." Santiago said.


    Samu Kussi

    The roar of a jet fighter brought Samu back to consciousness, a person wearing a black uniform was standing over him. Samu reached for his gun.

    "Hold on there, We're friendlies." The man said.

    "Who are you?" Samu asked.

    "I'm part of the Maine militia." He said.

    "The hell is that?" Samu asked.

    "The people who saved your asses." He said.

    "You're on our side?" Samu asked.

    "For now." He answered. "Looks like you got winged pretty badly."

    "Could be worse." Samu remarked.

    "It could be better." He said.

    "So, where are the Network now?" Samu asked.

    "The Network isn't here, it's only Mercs.Right now, they've retreated. What's left of them are hiding out in buildings. Our teams are searching ever inch of the place to find them." He said.

    "What about the civilians?" Samu asked.

    "They've been secured." He answered. "Now let's get you out of he- Gah!" The man said, then fell to the ground.

    "What the fuck?" Samu asked. He looked at the man and noticed a hold in the back of his head. Samu scrambled to find his gun.

    "Not so fast. Don't even move." A voice said. Samu looked at the source of the voice. A masked man towered above him, holding a pistol.

    "I've seen you before..." Samu said, racking his brain for any idea of where he saw this guy before. "Fort Bliss. You were the guy I saw on the screen..." Samu said.

    "And that would make you..." The masked man said. "Samu Kussi. What a lovely surprise. Maybe hiring these mercs wasn't such a bad idea after all." He said.

    "Go to Hell." Samu spat. The man chuckled.

    "After you." He said as he brought his boot down on Samu's face causing him to black out.


    Corporal Adam Johnson

    Adam glanced at the field hospital and began walking in that direction. If something was happening, he had to know. Sam could wait. He pushed the tent flap out of the way and walked in. The doctors had crowded around someone on a cot, but Adam couldn't see who it was. Adam walked through the hospital to where he'd last seen Elias.

    "Elias." He called.

    "Here." Elias answered, from behind him. Adam turned around and saw Elias next to Riley, who was tightly clinging to another woman.

    "What's going on?" Adam asked.

    "They just showed up. They're the people Riley was with before." Elias said.

    "What about that over there?" Adam asked motioning to the crowd of doctors.

    "She got stabbed, badly." Elias said, then leaned in closer dropping his voice to a whisper. "I heard the doctors say its less than a 50/50 chance she lives. It's bad." He said.

    "I see." Adam said.

    "And you are?" Adam asked the woman.

    "I guess we haven't had a proper introduction yet." She said. "I'm Ann. The one over there is Carmen." She said.

    "I'm Corporal Adam Johnson." Adam said. "I'm Kinda the go-to guy around here. If you have any questions, I'll try to answer them best I can."

    "How is Carmen? Every time I ask a doctor, they look away and don't say anything. I just need to know." Ann said.

    Choice

    [Tell the truth]

    [Lie]

  • [Tell the truth] I'm back!

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "I don't think I'm stupid enough to try and take on some drug lords on my own." Dillon said. "So, you want to go after the huma

  • yay! welcome back!

    [Tell the truth] I'm back!

  • Huh, looks like things turned from bad to worse for Samu. Hope he ends up okay.

    [Tell the truth]

    I'm curious too just how good or bad it is looking for her exactly.

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "I don't think I'm stupid enough to try and take on some drug lords on my own." Dillon said. "So, you want to go after the huma

  • [Tell the truth]

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "I don't think I'm stupid enough to try and take on some drug lords on my own." Dillon said. "So, you want to go after the huma

  • edited August 2015

    [Tell the truth]

    You got Samu's name wrong again, Kuusi* not Kussi ;D Things are looking pretty bad for him.

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "I don't think I'm stupid enough to try and take on some drug lords on my own." Dillon said. "So, you want to go after the huma

  • I... Keep... Doing it..... Gah! Mental note is taken, K.U.U.S.I. No Kussi. Got it. I think.

    finlander posted: »

    [Tell the truth] You got Samu's name wrong again, Kuusi* not Kussi ;D Things are looking pretty bad for him.

  • [Tell the truth]

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "I don't think I'm stupid enough to try and take on some drug lords on my own." Dillon said. "So, you want to go after the huma

  • [Tell the truth]

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "I don't think I'm stupid enough to try and take on some drug lords on my own." Dillon said. "So, you want to go after the huma

  • Dillon

    "This is it." He said, nodding his head in the direction of a partially build apartment building.

    "Finally, I thought my legs were going to fall off." Dillon said. The man shook his head.

    "You've done nothing but complain since you got here gringo, you need to relax a little." He said.

    "Relax? I'm here for some unknown reason trying to earn the trust of the Mexicans for God knows why." Dillon said.

    "Let's just get in there and set up before we run out of time." The man said. "I'll hide the horses, just go find a good vantage point overlooking the parking lot." He said. Dillon nodded in return, jumping off his horse. He walked towards the half built structure and drew his sword just in case. He walked through the open chain fence and into the actual structure, taking note of the foul smell coming from somewhere inside.

    "What the hell is that smell?" He asked no one in particular.

    "Smells like meth to me." A voice said behind him. He spun around and pointed his sword in the direction of the figure that was standing in the shadows. "What's up with the sword? You stuck in the middle ages or something?" He asked, stepping forward into the light. "This is our territory, so unless you got business here, I suggest you fuck off." He said gruffly. Dillon readied his sword to strike but the man pulled out gun. "Look kid, I gave you a chance to escape with your life. But no, you have to have something to prove against us. Drop the sword." He said. Dillon saw a figure appearing behind the man.

    "Okay, Okay. Fine." Dillon said as he dropped his sword and it fell to the ground with a clatter.

    "Kick it over." The man demanded. Dillon didn't budge. "Are you deaf? Kick over the sword, of I'm goin-" The man said, but was cut short when the figure behind him shoved a knife through the back of his neck. He fell to the ground choking on his own blood.

    "That was close." Dillon admitted.

    "If you count that as close, you haven't spent enough time in Mexico." The man said.

    "I rather not get to comfortable here." Dillon said.

    "That would be a wise choice. In Mexico, the life of a gringo is always a short one." The man said.

    "That's reassuring." Dillon said.

    "Let's get to the second floor so we have a view." The man said as he walked off. The building was not yet complete, and as it turned out it had no stairways yet. "I guess we just use a ladder." He said picking up a discarded ladder and carrying it off.

    "You know, I rode like three hours on horse back with you and I still don't know your name." Dillon said.

    "If you need to know, it's Cruz." He responded as he propped the ladder against the outer wall and climbed up onto the second level. Dillon followed right behind him. The second story didn't even have a roof on it yet, and most of the walls were incomplete.

    "Look's like they left this place in a hurry." Dillon remarked.

    "The treat of death tends to do that." Cruz responded as he walked to the other side of the building. "Here is good. I'll have a good shot on anyone in the lot." Cruz said.

    "And what do I do?" Dillon asked.

    "I don't know. Stay here and do nothing? Maybe you could go down there and set up and ambush, I'll lay down covering fire while you rip them apart." Cruz said.

    Choice

    [Stay in the building]

    [Go down and hide in the lot]


    Denver Brown

    "This is it. This is where it happened." Denver said looking over the ledge.

    "There's nothing down here!" Someone called from below.

    "Keep looking! The body has to be around here somewhere! Damn wolves must have gotten it." Denver called down.

    "Got something!" Another called.

    "You found the body?" Denver asked.

    "No, found a grave." They said.

    "Do you know it's hers?" Denver asked.

    "Yes. It has to be." They said. "I found her scarf wrapped around the cross. I also found a small trail of blood leading to the grave."

    "That's good. At least someone come along with the decency to bury her." Denver said.

    "Denver." A voice said behind him. Denver turned around to see a small group standing in front of him.

    "What is it?" Denver asked.

    "Do you think we should move her body back to the camp?" He asked.

    "No." Denver responded shaking his head. "Leave her where she lays."

    "How did it happen? How'd she die?" A woman asked.

    "Like I said before, the Network backed us up to the cliff. Katie sacrificed herself so I could get away." Denver said, once again.

    "Oh." She said. The crowd turned to leave but stopped. "Funny thing." She said, turning back to Denver.

    "What is it?" Denver asked.

    "That's not how our friend told us it went down." She said.

    "What friend are you talking about?" Denver asked. The woman stepped aside and a man walked out of the crowd. The Network agent from earlier.

    "Tell them." The woman demanded. "Tell them like you told me."

    "I was there when it happened." The man began, eyeing up Denver. "There was no Network involved, just a power hungry maniac. This man." He said, pointing at Denver. "Shot miss DiCanto, and proceeded to pushed her off a cliff. I was the one who buried the body." He said.

    "You lying son of a bitch. This wasn't part of the agreement." Denver said in a low tone, so only the man could hear him.

    "No, I remember saying the Network wouldn't bother you. I said nothing about your own people." He whispered in return, then turned to the crowd. "What do you say? Do we just let him walk after killing a resistance legend?" He asked.

    "No. We do the same to him that he did to Katie." A man hissed.

    "So it's settled." The man said, smiling in Denver's direction. He stepped out of the way. "Go now! Take your revenge!" He yelled. Denver watched in horror as the woman from earlier pulled a pistol out of her pants and shot at him, hitting him directly in the stomach. Denver crumpled to the ground in pain, as a man walked forward and picked him up by his shirt collar, dangling him over the ledge.

    "Put me down... We can work this out, I'm sure of it." Denver choked out. The man looked back.

    "You think he's telling the truth?" He asked. Then before anyone answered he shook his bald head. "Nah." He said as he let go and Denver fell downwards, hitting the ground like a ballistic missile, splattering his brains all over the rocks at the bottom.

    "You think he's dead?" One of the living people at the top asked. "Let's just make sure." Another answered, aiming his machine gun down at the already dead Denver and releasing a small burst. The woman stepped forward, emptying the rest of her clip into his body. The bald man stepped forward holding a Molotov cocktail, he lit it and threw it over the edge, burning Denver's already decimated remains. The crowd disappears one by one heading back to the camp, until only the Network agent is left. He walked down the trail to the bottom of the cliff and over to the make-shift grave. He pulls a green scarf and re-wraps it around the cross.

    "I'm sorry it came to this, you are a worthy adversary. If only it was over." He said as he stood up and walked away, in the direction of Mount Vernon. Yes, it was indeed far from over in America.


    Boom. I'm back. Sorry for the wait guys, I kinda forgot about this one.

  • edited August 2015

    Goddamn it... I have to be honest, up to this part I still had the slight hope that Katie survived that fall, but once again it kept getting worse. I mean, there was a lot of enjoyable stuff happening for her in the two weeks she actually lived in the story, so I was hoping she would stick around for a while instead of dying such an insignificant death. Even after she fell down that cliff I had a bit of hope, thinking that this can't be it, or else all of that build-up, her strange dream, her connection to Jack and her storyline in general would have been pointless. But this part once again put an end to my speculation for now, in the most horrible way ever. At first, when they found no body, I was overjoyed and finally thought there would be good news. And then, just a few lines later, they found that fucking grave and everything went to hell again. Denver's death just gave me even less hope. I mean, of course, maybe he just hit the ground in an unfortunate angle, but she definitely did not fall much softer or slower, even if her brain did not splatter all over the ground. Then there's the blood trail leading to the grave, that Network bastard who had her scarf to back up his story and the fact that there hasn't been anything to confirm my hopes, but plenty to contradict it in the past four weeks of the story. So... I don't know how I managed to hope for her survival for so long after such a fall, but that part crushed it, for good probably. Man, how I regret choosing that fucking option to check out the valley, but it looked like such a minor choice. Never thought it would cause her death just like that.

    By the way, I sadly have to say that the way Denver's death happened is my least favourite part of the story so far, not counting Katie's death itself. Not from a writing point, the writing was great as always, but because of how extremely and utterly unsatisfying it was. After what he did, I deeply hoped for vengeance instead of a quick death for him. He got so much less than he deserved and it was quite the bummer to see that he even got away with killing her without getting a real punishment. In fact, his quick death almost felt like a reward compared to the things he would have deserved. While there are of course still others responsible, he was the one who actually killed her and the one who would deserve the worst fate imaginable. He went out far too easily and I only hope that at least the guy who gave the order to kill her gets it a lot worse.

    Finally, given how much I speculate, I will probably still not be able to just accept her death without the ultimate proof. Perhaps could you do me a favour and actually show her body in some way in the next part or at least as soon as possible, so that her fate finally gets confirmed without any room for doubt? I don't know how it could still be possible to show her body after this part, but perhaps you find a way. I mean, the grave was a nice touch and unexpected, coming from such a Network monster, but it also failed to confirm her fate without any doubt for me, as no one checked if she was truly in it. And the fact that the Network asshole was talking about her in the present tense, as if he knows that she still is a worthy adversary, that just made it worse. The way he said "If only it was over" made me feel that there is more behind it and that he might hasn't revealed everything in front of the resistance. Perhaps he just meant the war in general, but I can't stop thinking that he might meant that it was not over yet for Katie. This feeling of doubt is simply plain terrible and I'm afraid her body, dead or not, would be the only thing that could put an end to it. I just can't stand incertainty when it comes to my favourite characters and in her case this feeling has been going on for four long weeks now in which I only got more doubtful and uncertain.

    [Go down and hide in the lot]

    Nearly forgot to vote for the first part over this damn second part. Whatever Dillon...

    By the way, one question since it won't happen now: What would have happened to her in the long run if she would have survived? Would she ever find out what her strange dream was about, or that Jack was the one who killed her sister? And what exactly was her dream about? Or would she have died either way a bit later? God, thinking about what could have been is depressing.

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "This is it." He said, nodding his head in the direction of a partially build apartment building. "Finally, I thought my legs w

  • edited August 2015

    [Go down and hide in the lot]

    Like Liquid I also hoped for Katies survival because I enjoyed her parts the most while catching up with the story but I think this part sadly confirmed her fate in some way. I even had my own theory how she could survive but was until now a bit unsure if I should share it as I was afraid it could be wrong. While I read the last Jack part again and saw my character Lester, I read that he has found a woman outside of the walls who couldnt be identified by the Network and until this part I have thought it could be Katie. I was surprised that I was the only one who saw this but now I see that I was completely wrong with it

    mr.quality posted: »

    Dillon "This is it." He said, nodding his head in the direction of a partially build apartment building. "Finally, I thought my legs w

  • While I read the last Jack part again and saw my character Lester, I read that he has found a woman outside of the walls who couldnt be identified by the Network and until this part I have thought it could be Katie

    God, I am glad that I haven't made this connection before, that would have made this damn part even worse for me. While I have read the line in question, I have never thought it could be Katie as he found this woman at a completely different location, but I can't even imagine how much more horrible this newest part would have been for me if I would have made the same connection you made. So, this Lester guy is your character? He is working for the Network, right?

    janitor posted: »

    [Go down and hide in the lot] Like Liquid I also hoped for Katies survival because I enjoyed her parts the most while catching up with th

  • Yes, Lester is my character, I cant wait to read more about him in this awesome story :) I am not sure if he works for the Network. He is a civilian and is mentioned as a civilian in the main post of the story but I dont know what mr.quality has planned for him of course. Maybe he works for the Network without joining them or he is forced to help them. I dont want to reveal too much about him before mr.quality makes it in the story but it would have maked sense for him to help Katie and maybe to lie to the Network about where he found her.

    While I read the last Jack part again and saw my character Lester, I read that he has found a woman outside of the walls who couldnt be iden

  • Ach verdammte scheiße... pardon my not-french. You know your character better than I do and if you say it would have made sense for him to help her, then your theory actually makes a lot of sense, or would have made a lot of sense until the last part kinda destroyed it. Still, that made me only more uncertain and nervous about her fate. I know, your theory is pretty much confirmed wrong now, but still I somehow hope you are right or at least not completely wrong. I don't have much hope though, even though I will continue to be nervous as long as her body hasn't appeared, dead or alive. And trust me, I hate that feeling. As for Lester, I hope he is just forced to work for the Network, because I'm done with anyone who supports the Network willingly. I already regret that I ever showed a bit of mercy to these fuckers in past choices, almost as much as I regret making the choice that caused Katie to check that fucking valley at night and got her killed. Any chance that Lester ends up brutally torturing every Network member in Virginia to death like they deserve it? He's pretty much the only one left there who could do that.

    janitor posted: »

    Yes, Lester is my character, I cant wait to read more about him in this awesome story I am not sure if he works for the Network. He is a ci

  • edited August 2015

    I don't think so, even though I would like him to do it. But if I remember him correctly he is not the kind of man who would torture someone to death, even if the Network people deserve it. But who knows, maybe my theory is not completely wrong and Katie ends up alive and in a position where she can take revenge. I think she would be more willing to fight against the Network. I dont think I got it completely right with my theory but this Network agent from the last part seems a bit dubious, as if he would know more about the situation. Now that I think about it I am also not completely convinced about her fate because there are many things that point at her survival but also many things that point at her death. i hope you get confirmation about her soon because I am very curious too.

    Ach verdammte scheiße... pardon my not-french. You know your character better than I do and if you say it would have made sense for him to h

  • I am not sure if he works for the Network.

    He doesn't work for the Network, He was one of the civilians captured during the takeover. :)

    janitor posted: »

    Yes, Lester is my character, I cant wait to read more about him in this awesome story I am not sure if he works for the Network. He is a ci

  • edited August 2015

    What would have happened to her in the long run if she would have survived? Would she ever find out what her strange dream was about, or that Jack was the one who killed her sister? And what exactly was her dream about? Or would she have died either way a bit later? God, thinking about what could have been is depressing.

    Maybe, Maybe not. I never think very far ahead while writing, which is what makes it fun for me. But I can confirm that if you wouldn't have picked to go to the valley, it wouldn't have ended how it did. As for the dream, I can't say much about it yet. Maybe it was just a dream? Maybe it wasn't. In due time my friend. In due time.

    By the way, I sadly have to say that the way Denver's death happened is my least favourite part of the story so far, not counting Katie's death itself. Not from a writing point, the writing was great as always, but because of how extremely and utterly unsatisfying it was. After what he did, I deeply hoped for vengeance instead of a quick death for him

    :( I tried. I'm not a gory detail person, I'll try better next time.

    I have to be honest, up to this part I still had the slight hope that Katie survived that fall, but once again it kept getting worse.

    Mr.Quality,breaking hearts since 1999.

    Goddamn it... I have to be honest, up to this part I still had the slight hope that Katie survived that fall, but once again it kept getting

  • Aha, I knew it :D That was the reason why I havent realized that it was him when I was reading the part for the first time. I havent thought he would first appear in a Network camp but that makes sense. I cant really remember all of the details I have mentioned while writing him but he is not a fan of the Network, right?

    mr.quality posted: »

    I am not sure if he works for the Network. He doesn't work for the Network, He was one of the civilians captured during the takeover.

  • No. Not at all.

    janitor posted: »

    Aha, I knew it That was the reason why I havent realized that it was him when I was reading the part for the first time. I havent thought h

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